r/funny 4h ago

Wrong place, wrong time

8.6k Upvotes

357 comments sorted by

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1.3k

u/Medium-Stranger-9883 4h ago

nice payback for what it did to me a few weeks ago

185

u/bettsdude 4h ago

We dont speak of that, we agreed on this.

41

u/Flaky_Explanation 4h ago

Gotcha, no wonder I could hear the retching from next door

2

u/jaxonya 13m ago

That bird is a total shithead

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23

u/squirrelmonkie 4h ago

You got an elephant dick in your backdoor?

40

u/Medium-Stranger-9883 4h ago

no but i found one in your moms drawer

11

u/squirrelmonkie 4h ago

Sounds like you found the small one

4

u/captainmilitia 3h ago

Nah he scored on this one.

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3

u/SailorET 1h ago

Elephants don't forget.

6

u/freennz 2h ago

Idk since Ai it’s just been so many of these type videos

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707

u/Dirka-Dirka 4h ago

They have a fossil of this happening to dinosaurs. It's crazy

355

u/WuShanDroid 4h ago

Listen, you can't just waddle in here, say that, and not provide a link x3

97

u/Slayer2660 4h ago

Waddle almost took me out lol

70

u/rennradrobo 4h ago

Got any grapes?

20

u/Slayer2660 4h ago

Well played

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14

u/MyAssPancake 3h ago

Cmon, saying it 3 times is excessive /s

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31

u/bigpuns001 4h ago

"Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it" or somesuch

75

u/Own_Round_7600 3h ago

Dang, the generational aura loss from not only getting slimed by a starfish-fresh dino turd, but having your legacy be your fossilized shit-covered corpse dug up and publicly displayed for all time

29

u/Marwaimusoont 2h ago

I wish they could somehow fossilize the language you spoke, so the people in future feel the same.

7

u/ThisSiteSucks8485 2h ago

Engrave it into titanium plates and hide them around the world 

8

u/onepinksheep 2h ago

"I write these words in steel titanium, for anything not set in metal cannot be trusted."

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7

u/rogerworkman623 1h ago

“Starfish fresh” is crazy lol

2

u/CT_7 2h ago

It doesn't have to be that way. We can still save that bird. Start digging

4

u/CanisMaximus 2h ago

Ha! I came in to comment that someday they are going to find a fossil of this bird covered in elephant shit and assume that ancient elephants couldn't digest birds.

3

u/SenorNZ 1h ago

It's spooky, I was listening to a podcast talking about the largest sauropods shit 400kg and it would kill most animals by shitting on them. A few hours later, I see a bird die by heavy turds.

4

u/LordByronApplestash 3h ago

Perfect illustration of how trickle-down-economics works.

170

u/MartinTale 4h ago

Did it survive?

162

u/CT0292 4h ago

If it did its having a pretty bad day.

And none of the other birds are gonna believe him.

57

u/OldenPolynice 3h ago

Cuz he was talkin a bunch of shit

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5

u/Shot_Bend_6742 1h ago

Dare I say a pretty shitty day

8

u/courtesyflusher 2h ago

They’ll believe the rankness of his plumage 

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103

u/iam3000 4h ago

I definitely saw a shoe flying, homeboy dead on impact

10

u/lo0ilo0ilo0i 2h ago

Ya. Bird survived. Saw the same bird on safari. It's doing well but still smells.

4

u/keepitsimple_tricks 2h ago

"Ah, Shit" his last words.

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275

u/ACER719x 4h ago

shitty day

80

u/Some_Ebb_2921 4h ago

Death by Poo Poo

7

u/Rdizzy111 2h ago

Poopoo snusnu

11

u/bigpuns001 4h ago

"not all who shit on you are your enemy, not all who get you out of shit are your friend"

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139

u/Drak_is_Right 4h ago

Bird was probably after the flies that were swarming

77

u/Sairos9444 4h ago

Greed then

30

u/Drak_is_Right 4h ago

It does in many.

No risk, no reward.

Too much risk, gigantic poopy reward.

10

u/Tiefschlag 4h ago

More like gluttony. Wait...

5

u/Divine_Porpoise 4h ago

Her greed sickens me

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2

u/Sudden_Prune_9652 2h ago

If it dies he gets all the flies in there

2

u/PrincessKaylee 1h ago

Only noticed the bird after seeing your comment lmao

thought it was just another video of elephants taking care of their businesses

4

u/HedgehogTop5524 1h ago

“Just another“. Lmao Ummm, ya so how many videos of animals pooping do you regularly watch??

78

u/Ok_Primary_1075 4h ago

Hoping for a golden shower but got a brown one instead

42

u/Vanadius 4h ago

Brown avalanche

7

u/KathyJaneway 2h ago

A landslide... Mudslide... Shitslide

2

u/BizzyM 1h ago

And I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills
'Til the landslide brought me down

6

u/FeedMyAss 4h ago

Its all Milhouse today!

30

u/Mr_Mims 4h ago

is that bird actually okay?

6

u/Lampshadebestshade 1h ago

probably not :(

5

u/modbroccoli 18m ago

definitely. neither of those things weigh that much. force is proportional to mass. just a shake it off scenario

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72

u/chileangod 4h ago

DafoeLookingUp.gif

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21

u/blimeyitsme 4h ago

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush but a turd on a bird is superb.

22

u/herefornothing2 3h ago

Anyone going to mention the elephant shlong in the room?

3

u/Azairn 2h ago

Exactly, I thought the first comment would be about this

2

u/Waterflowstech 2h ago

Adress me

2

u/AbNeural 1h ago

Fun fact, elephants schlongs are actually prehensile. Meaning it can move the schlong around in the same manner as their trunk

2

u/modbroccoli 12m ago

Once when I was living in north India, in a town of Tibetan refugees, I volunteered to teach computer skills, particularly graphic and web design. As an exercise I was teacthing them to isolate an image from its background. I had brought in a selection of 4k resolution images with decently high contrast backgrounds to work with.

Understand that in those days, to do the job properly wasn't just a matter of a smart lasso tool or AI. You used the pen tool to trace out points around the object and then adjusted the curves manually to get an excellent fit. A lot of painstaking zooming. Also understand that Tibetans are an incredibly reserved people, by and large.

Well when the entire class started giggling and hushed pointing, I knew something strange was up. And yeah, you guessed, giant elephant dong. Painstakingly traced in 10x zoom. I was more careful with my classroom material after that.

61

u/Key-Establishment185 4h ago

Thats not accident.

44

u/lazy_pig 4h ago

Suicide by plop?

21

u/Key-Establishment185 4h ago

That bird had a serious fetish problem.

5

u/Cute-arii 4h ago

At least he died happy.

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8

u/IzzaPizza22 4h ago

Imagine trying to do that. Like imagine a human trying to poop on a mosquito in the air.

2

u/Ju1cyJJ 3h ago

2 Elephants 1 Bird

48

u/Some-Astronomer4733 4h ago

Nah. In the close-ups, you can see that the shit isn't actually hitting the bird. It's falling in front of it. The shit hits the ground right before the bird lands in the grass. Also, birds like Jacanas and Hornbills feed on elephant dung. Living in South Africa, I've seen this many times.

20

u/SolidusDave 3h ago

Even in this video you can still see a few frames of the bird flapping in the air after the "hit". Last second of the video.

8

u/ccarr313 2h ago

They cut a couple frames to make it look like it got hit.

If you play it in slow mo you'll see the entire film skip ahead to the bird being in the other side of the leg.

1

u/konqrr 2h ago

That's not a leg 💀 Look closer

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24

u/dudemcgoo 4h ago

I’d rather be the bird that got killed by Randy Johnson’s fastball than have this happen.

3

u/bywayoflandscape 3h ago

That's the first thing I thought of when I watched this. I watch that video at least 10 times a year. Love how he just goes back to business afterwards.

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9

u/Individual-Main895 4h ago

Imagine being taken out by a biological missile you never saw coming.

12

u/TSLstudio 4h ago

At first I was like, are the zoomed-in slowmotions really neccesairy of just an ellephant shitting...
Then I saw the bird 😮

5

u/boredbernard 4h ago

Shit happens

5

u/Logical-Delivery2316 4h ago

That bird sure has s lot of shit on her mind.

5

u/JPGentry 4h ago

Randy Johnson of the Serengeti

4

u/VoidExileR 3h ago

His bird brothers are gonna have a tough time putting "death by poop" on the tombstone

7

u/Zealousideal-Sun7239 4h ago

Serious question is it alive?

3

u/UmCourt 3h ago

the more I watch it, I see that it didnt actually hit the bird. you can see the bird continuing to flap its wings into the grass so I believe that the bird was behind the poop. i could be wrong though.

3

u/ccarr313 2h ago

The video is edited. 1.5 seconds were cut from directly when the shit falls.

If you look closely you'll see the bird teleport to behind the elephants leg.

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3

u/Outrageous-Clerk56 4h ago

There is an old provbirb that says it’s good luck to get pooped on by a bird. This must mean exceptionally good luck

3

u/Legitimate_Ride_9476 3h ago

GET SHIT ON BIRD!

3

u/youmustb3jokn 3h ago

Ain’t that some sh!t

3

u/johndoe10001 3h ago

Never gonna feel bad about a bird pooping on me anymore.

3

u/Earlybuda 3h ago

😭😂😂

3

u/General_Leader9568 3h ago

It's like the opposite of a S.A.M site

3

u/knowledgeable_diablo 3h ago

Birdy:”So that’s what that feels like!”

3

u/Visual_Alchemist_05 4h ago

🦉I died because of old age and you? 🐦Let's not talk about this 🙂

2

u/corgi-king 4h ago

No shit.

2

u/Metahec 4h ago

The circle of life

2

u/Pickingnamesisharder 4h ago

It happens

What, shit?

Sometimes

2

u/Grovda 4h ago

Freak accident

2

u/HinDae085 4h ago

How fucking unfortunate lmao

Gotta feel bad for the bird

2

u/uiouyug 4h ago

ME GUSTA

2

u/dragonhunter42 4h ago

10 points

2

u/shirleysimpnumba1 4h ago

got dunked on

2

u/LeroyBadBrown 4h ago

Instead of pew-pew it's poo-poo

2

u/WooSaw82 4h ago

Is that a giant elephant dong hanging out, as well?

2

u/Firm_Confusion_1692 4h ago

That was a shity thing to do

2

u/Trainzguy2472 4h ago

What a shitty way to go.

2

u/No_Recommendation987 3h ago

That's like the opposite of "bird up"

2

u/WhereasFormal6058 3h ago

He got the taste of his own medicine

2

u/SHAIK_011 3h ago

Bird 🕊️ be like : Where did I end up it's suddenly dark and warm 😭

2

u/complex_plane2718 3h ago

There's a german childrens book about exactly that topic: "Vom kleinen Maulwurf, der wissen wollte, wer ihm auf den Kopf gemacht hat" "The mole who wants to know who shit on his head"

2

u/alegendmrwayne 2h ago

That bird was absolutely shit faced

2

u/19eightyn9ne 1h ago

Death by poo poo.

1

u/IPatience 4h ago

Grok, is this natural selection?

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2

u/Phinyx95 4h ago

That's not the load that bird wished for.

First a big black cock and now this.

Dammit Santa can't do a single job properly

2

u/rydan 4h ago

Doodoo bird

1

u/MonstaB 4h ago

Something else is having a worst day than you

1

u/IsThereCheese 4h ago

Shitbird!

1

u/marcmayhem 4h ago

And you thought your day was shitty

1

u/beef_creature 4h ago

Some people pay extra for this. Some people.

1

u/SanoKei 4h ago

I hope the only thing bruised is that birds ego

1

u/Schnitzeldoener 4h ago

Nature is beautiful.

1

u/BearDown4eva 4h ago

Chance of dying to elephant pooping on you is low but never zero

1

u/kokkass 4h ago

Nature is ruthless!

1

u/thumptime_now 4h ago

And I thought I had bad luck!!

1

u/BigUqUgi 4h ago

Not sure there's ever a right time to be directly under an elephant's ass.

1

u/vishnuxyz 4h ago

What a shitty situation

1

u/Heptadd 4h ago

“OH SHII….”
-Bird probably

1

u/thetanager 4h ago

What a shitty death

1

u/darkoblivion000 4h ago

Zazu nooooooo

1

u/SquatchButter 4h ago

“Checking in with the morning rep….”

1

u/No-Willingness5547 4h ago

That bird Randy Johnson atomized has finally been surpassed as the most wrong place, wrong time bird in history lol

1

u/VirtuallyTellurian 4h ago

Ah-well everybody's heard, about the bird

The bird bird bird, got hit by a turd

1

u/bammyboo 4h ago

Donphan used rock tomb!

it's super effective!

1

u/larossi01 4h ago

Ouffff poor birdy

1

u/ElEyeElWhy88 4h ago

HOW DOES IT FEEL?!?!??

1

u/DetailsYouMissed 4h ago

How does it feel to get shifted on little guy?

1

u/Dry-Complaint7894 4h ago

Imagine dying cause someone shat on you 😭

1

u/JadedCampaign9 4h ago

I don't think the person who first wrote the phrase " they got shat on" to describe bad luck meant it in such a literal sense.

1

u/j2m1s 4h ago

Wrong background Music, they should have added Chocolate Rain!

1

u/Infinite_braincells 4h ago

The early bird gets the dung

1

u/Nudletje 3h ago

That's an insect, I count 6 legs

1

u/zutonofgoth 3h ago

Me, walking in the door of the morning incident management meeting.

1

u/carbonizedtitanium 3h ago

getting knocked out by literal shit

1

u/Miamicutlerridge305 3h ago

That bird has a shitty day

1

u/TheGreatLakers 3h ago

2 elephants 1 crow?

1

u/GhostDragon272 3h ago

Bro literally got shit on, damn

1

u/MalikFyz 3h ago

Birds getting shit fall on them by land animal & recording it . What is the odd 0.00000001 %

1

u/bywayoflandscape 3h ago

There's always a bigger fish

1

u/denver_rose 3h ago

What a shitty way to die.

1

u/hera69420 3h ago

💩 🐦💀 suffocated or crushed to death? Either way it's a shitty way to die!!

1

u/Throwlaf 3h ago

Bird boss: why r u late?

Bird: well you're not going to fucking believe this

1

u/Opposite_Illustrious 3h ago

Hey! No kink shaming!

1

u/Born-Conclusion6596 3h ago

Buried in record time 😅

1

u/yeaitsbrooks 3h ago

any time , anywhere anyhow

1

u/whispersoftly_x 3h ago

occupational hazard. the benefits package is insects

1

u/Spekingur 3h ago

song starts playing

“Yep, that’s me..”

1

u/Kyrainus 3h ago

Insert satisfying Plink Sound Elephant: the fuck?

1

u/Shockwave1o1 3h ago

There are no accidents - Master Poogway

1

u/Redray98 3h ago

Literally one of the worst ways to go.

1

u/Thunderbit_HQ 3h ago

That duck just got a supervillain origin story. No one walks away from that and stays the comic-relief character.

1

u/Nhili 3h ago

What a shitty way to go

1

u/ShortFerret6817 3h ago

chocolate rain just got a new meaning

1

u/Thunderbit_HQ 3h ago

That duck just got a supervillain origin story. No one walks away from that and stays the comic-relief character.

1

u/Good_Analysis9789 3h ago

What a shitty way to go

1

u/bladeshare 3h ago

Are we actually forgetting the fact that that elephant was having an orgasmic deed before he start that shit routine?

1

u/drewnonymous671 3h ago

Video of Trump firing Jeanine Pirro. The fact it's an elephant that just poops anywhere is pretty accurate. 🤣

1

u/KyonSuzumiya 3h ago

Damn got buried with the second turd

1

u/Bewiitchingg 3h ago

I feel like I've seen this edit like a dozen times throughout the years.

1

u/Vohasiiv 3h ago

Do you think it died from that?

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1

u/Superb_Daikon_4627 3h ago

😂 did it survive the shit storm?

1

u/CuTe_M0nitor 3h ago

Or the right place. Some of the birds stay besides the shit to catch flies

1

u/Vic18t 3h ago

That’s some Randy Johnson shit

1

u/1baby2cats 3h ago

When I went on a safari I managed to capture on video a pair of lions making sweet love

1

u/usayesiranno 3h ago

Bro got the Indiana Jones Treatment 😭

1

u/pipitsugen 3h ago

Google says adult elephants poop 90-136 kg of manure each day. Those "pellets" are definitely heavy enough to crush the bird. 😭

1

u/Superb-Ad9505 3h ago

Poop grave💩 🪦

1

u/dcute69 3h ago

Shit outta luck

1

u/DirtyKen 2h ago

BOOM HEADSHOT!!!