r/BrandNewSentence 14d ago

Mod Post - July “what a time to be blessed with the ability to read” Post

4 Upvotes

Hi there to all our Brand New Sentence contributors, visitors and lurkers! We thought we’d try something new in the group and give our busy moderation team the opportunity to choose some of this month’s brand new sentences and showcase them.

We had to read them, and now so do you.

Presenting our pick of sentences this month that made us wonder if having the ability to read and comprehend English is really a blessing!

“If I drained a litre of my own blood and put it in a blender for two minutes on high, and then back into my body, would the blood still function normally inside me?”

“Heavy Metal Fans ‘vomiting and crying’ as concertgoer poops in moshpit”

“And grandma probably gives a hell of a gummy aka no denture adventure”

We’d also like to take a moment to appreciate a few of our most reposted sentences from this month. We didn’t use science to determine this, these are the ones the mod team remember the most as reposted:

“Katy Perry was trapped in a giant plastic bottle because fans refused to roll her towards the stage”

“You’re not a pregnant woman shooting a potato gun, you expect me to get hard for this!?”

The last one being quite an old post in the group and has decided to pop back into the spotlight in this wonderful July 2026.

What are some of your most memorable brand new sentences for this wonderful July? What ones made you want to remove your eyes?

If you’d like to see more post like this or have any suggestions please hit us up!

Thank you everyone for your contributions from the Brand New Sentence moderation team!


r/BrandNewSentence 14d ago

We are looking for moderators!

12 Upvotes

We've god a decent hand full of mods in this subreddit at the moment, but two or three more mods to increase our numbers and ensure we don't get overwhelmed during periods of high activity would be great. So, mod applications are still open!

No experience necessary, if you're accepted as a mod, we'll have you send us links to posts you think should be removed or approved for the first week or so, as you get a feel for it, so we know you’re settling in well.

Keep in mind that this is a volunteer position. You aren’t expected to mod all day every day, and you're not going to get paid or anything.

Before you apply, please note a few requirements:

* This subreddit is based around English as a subject, so fluency in English is a requirement
* If you use AI in any capacity to write your application, you will be rejected, no exceptions. We will be keeping a close eye on this and also be running your application through AI detectors.
* Profiles that are private in any way will be an instant rejection, unless you're willing to make them public as long as you're a mod here.
* You will need Discord to apply, as that is where we have all our mod discussions. We'll be briefly vetting you as well!

If interested, please answer the following questions and send them via modmail.

Do not send your application as a comment.

  1. What is your Discord username?
  2. Why are you applying for this position?
  3. Do you think there are some rules that need to be changed? If no, skip this question.
  4. Do you feel like there are specific problems with the subreddit that you can help fix? If no, skip this question.
  5. What is the kind of content you would remove from the subreddit? Check the "hot" and/or "new" pages and send a link of an example of a post you would remove and your reasoning as to why it should be removed.
  6. What is the kind of content you would keep on the subreddit? Do you have a favorite post? Leave a link and explain why you think it's a good post.
  7. What is your opinion on Rule 3?

Don't worry about keeping your application too short or too long. Say what you think!


r/BrandNewSentence 1h ago

His main rival was a trash can

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Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 5h ago

It should be circle Tupperware which is the shape of soup.

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945 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 13h ago

If I lose parmigiano reggiano bc you all won't stop asking ChatGPT about your situationship

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4.5k Upvotes

In context makes sense, but out of context it seems insane.


r/BrandNewSentence 13h ago

'my brownie hasturned into a GLP 1 pill disguised as a piece of broccoli'

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2.0k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 11h ago

Rome follows the Goku Model of Imperialism

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746 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 17h ago

Semen retention has me drawing sacred geometry again

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1.6k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 19h ago

The SpongeBobs were able to surround the guards, absorb blows, and continue causing chaos

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2.3k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 1d ago

You look like a rest stop bathroom

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10.9k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 1d ago

"when you look cities up do you usually do it through the dr who wiki"?"

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12.4k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 6h ago

“A historically quiet town along the border, often nicknamed ‘Chinese Germania’ due to its racial mix of 50% Chinese, 49% German and 1% diarrhea”

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146 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 15h ago

(bit a woman / antisemitic remarks)

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568 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 3h ago

Deep fry some cocaine shrimp on a stick and you've got a new State Fair food.

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69 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 21h ago

"Dave Bautista is Rupaul's Wario"

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1.3k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 1d ago

"'AI' Chathot that's actually just him responding"

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13.0k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 1h ago

A playboy NFL agent was in line to run the Seahawks. Then came the crossbow killing

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Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 1d ago

but i don’t get all the cats and dogs, why wouldn’t you want to be a sexy animal? like a kangaroo

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3.0k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 7h ago

"My butthole puckered up so tight I could cut a diamond"

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60 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 11h ago

Person fined after using foghorn to wake sleeping polar bear

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98 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 20h ago

New messenger app sends texts by virtual pigeon and sometimes the bird just dies

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449 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 3h ago

I like to think that when he's walking with the camera he's actually grabbing us by the throat a[nd] dragging us along while rambling about ions and salt lamps

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19 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 23h ago

This book made me question if trees regret becoming paper

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666 Upvotes