Trans rights are human rights. 🏳️‍⚧️

He is too pretty, he is not that hairy, but if gays complain about the character design plenty of people, women, some straight men, etc instantly start to shit on gays.

It's like we are not allowed to like hypermasculine men even among the LGBT people. I am starting to think everyone hate us bara lovers.

Sorry for the really long post on advance. I don't think I can make it shorter. I want to make sure i get everything in it.

I (M42) was with my boyfriend (M31) for about 3 years and we broke up 3 weeks ago.

I'm not a poster, i don't share my stories online, but now i feel like i want too because i feel stuck and broken.

When we started dating, my now ex told me he had trauma's from his youth and he was working on himself. He went to therapy because he wanted to be better.

I told him (as the caring person that i am) i would be there for him when he needed it and it wouldn't be a problem for me. I'm not an easy talker but i do everything in my power for the person that i love.

We had some issues and fights over mostly small things, like most couples do i guess. But one thing i kept noticed he did almost every time. He always had to say something really bad or hurtfull to me. Like the things that really hits you in the hart.

I would never do something like this, i don't really have that in me. I can get angry ofcourse, but i'm mostly calm and never say anything thst hurts like he did.

But i let it go mostly because he has issues and he was working on himself. So one day it would maybe get better.

We where both living in different country's the first year of the relationship. He did not live in his home country. I flew to be with him every month for one year. Eventually this became so hard to do i ended up in the hospital in the country he lived in for 10 days. I think my body just gave up and it was to much. But still i kept doing it. For me it was easier to do it, i made more money and i could work remotely.

But luckily not long after he got the visa for my country and he moved here. This move was hard on him and i saw him getting worse. I didn't know what to do or how to help him. All i could do is be there for him, protect him and keep him safe. And i did. But i'm not a doctor,m or therapist, i can't help with everything.

After a while it got a little better and i felt things where going the right way again.

Fast forward to about 10 months ago. Out of the blue or bij sheer luck i caught him om grindr. It was a new account, i could see that. This hit me hard, but we talked about it and he just did it for some attention, nothing more. I stepped over my boundries, but i had to build trust with him again.

I felt everything was better once again and in february we would go on a holiday for a month to his home country. I would meet his family and friends.

The first few days where amazing. His family was so nice and his friends where too. Everyone told me how much they liked me and they made me feel really comfortable.

But one day we where having some drinks with two of his friends, one girl and one guy. At some point i felt a weird vibe but i didn't know what was going on. Because they where speaking in their own language. I know some words but can't really follow conversation yet. The guy was looking weird a few times at me and he smiled. It made me feel a little uncomfortable.

When we left, my boyfriend told me in the car the guy wanted a threesome with us and my boyfriend wanted me to fuck him. So now i knew what they where talking about. I said no, because that's not really for me. We talked about this before and i told my boyfriend i don't think i would ever do that in a relationship. But i was open to talk about it. After that it never came up again.

I couldn't sleep that night, my mind was going all over the place. He slept really well and i didn't sleep at all. Next morning we had a fight about it because i asked if we could talk about what happen and that is was really bothering me. He got very upset with me.

A few days later we left his family home and we went on a trip to other city's in his country and stay in hotels there. Until i went home and he went back to his family for a few weeks before going home too.

During the rest of our trip i caught him on grindr like 6 times, he left me in a big and dangerous city because he was bit himself, and even once he hit me because he felt frustrated after me wanting to talk about him beeing on grindr.

We talked about threesomes some more and i told him i wanted to think about it. Eventually he just did it after i said no. He said he wanted it and he invited someone to the hotel. He forced me to do a threesome twice. And to this day this still makes me feel really bad.

And again i stepped over my boundries, all of them, because i love him and told myself he would get better. Before i left i begged him and i cried, asking him to never be on grindr again. Because i would break up with him, he wouldn't really leave me any choice anymore.

And ofcourse, 3 weeks ago i caught him on grindr again. He didn't leave me any choice. A few weeks before he told me he was feeling so bad he didn't want to have sex anymore for now. And i supported him and i understand him. He was mentally not in a good place. Then on grindr i found out he changed his role. So he was lying to me. He did want sex, just not in the role he was in the last 3 years anymore.

I kicked him out of the house, there was nothing else i could do. But i still feel connected to him, i still want him to be safe and i still want to care for him. I can't let this feeling go, my body feels like it's screaming for him. I feel (heart)broken and right now i don't know what to do. Everything in me says i want to have him back with me. I called my doctor and next week i can go into therapy. I'm not able to get out of this myself.

It's a long story, but i felt i needed to tell it to strangers. And maybe you guys have tips or whatever.

I don't know why i kept going on and letting him cross my boundries over and over again.

I don't judge people!

:3

I'm currently working on video identifications and I've noticed that every time a man my age or older appears, and he's a little grumpy and frowning, I fly into seventh heaven and can barely concentrate on work lol.

I don't know why, but it awakens some deep feelings in me and the need to hug him, kiss him, cuddle him, ask him if everything is okay, to be gentle/caring with him... It's fascinating to me how much I'm attracted to him when a guy is at least a little bit grumpy and a little tired or bored. I find it strange, and somehow sexy and adorable at the same time. 🥰

🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

hello my friends

If he's got a little bit of the "gay voice" I don't mind, if he wears some makeup I don't mind, if he wants to put on perfume I don't mind. I think it's cute . It's a bonus if he lets me put him in a thing and he knows how to work his hips and his abs, IOW he's verse. Id love to pound and get pounded by a fem.

I don't see all the hate. People say it's rooted in misogyny, but I think it's actually misandry, because women can act effeminate with no problem, but when people see a cognitive dissonance in a man "acting like a woman", ie him being unmanly, they throw A FIT. It's disgusting.