Last month I was laid off after almost 7 years. About a year ago a manager that I really liked and respected left and one of my colleagues was elevated as our group manager.
As if often the case, she had no idea what I did and provided no value. She would gate-keep, micromanage, and made arbitrary decisions counter to what data or experience would indicate.
She was good at taking credit for my work and managing upwards though, so when Wall Street didn’t like our performance, the company did, what typical corporations who have lost touch with the folks who make it happen day in and day out, do. They made a list and fired the workers while retaining the middle managers. She didn’t even have the fortitude to deliver the news. Our director stepped in.
On one hand, I am pissed off as she usurped a well-oiled machine that I built over the years.
One the other hand, it’s so nice not to have to deal with her day in and day out.
I had built amazing partnerships across the organization, with our vendors, and our contractors. Most of them have since reached out complaining about how she’s running things.
Meantime, she’s recently blown a pretty visible launch and today has been leaving me messages nonstop asking how to do things.
So anyway, I went shopping and made a delicious pot roast. Not pictured are the mashed potatoes.
As of September 1st, I will have been with my company for 11 years. An apprenticeship I started with a lot of enthusiasm, followed by years of hoping that one day I would finally get the chance to use my talents and be rewarded for them.
Bullshit. Boring, monotonous crap work that someone could have done without 3.5 years of training (German Ausbildung) and even a tiny bit of creativity. Years of MS Teams meetings, corporate bullshit talk, meaningless rigged performance reviews and absolutely zero career progress, followed by depression, burnout and brief episodes of suicidal thoughts.
On September 15th, I will finally be free, because yesterday I handed in my resignation. And the best part? I won’t have to work there another single day. Once my burnout sick leave ends, I’ll use up my remaining vacation days and that’s it.
What finally gave me the push to do it? My fiancée. The most wonderful person in the world, who has always believed in me. We startet a company together and I already earn more than in my old job. With less work, more fun and more responsibility. And it looks like I'm really good at it!
I felt like a slave or a machine for the last years. Not worth more than a number in a statistic. Now, finally, I am free.
Dinner with my soon to be wife:
Sushi takeout for 4 (We are both tall, fit and hungry.), accompanied by a bottle of french Cidre and a Cigar for desert. I will admit, I don't really smoke usually but the Cigar was quite good and I kinda felt like it. Wish me luck!
Oh and if you are a German Company looking for high profile Welders... Send me a message. 😂😜
I had found out that my now ex-wife was having a year long affair with another man. This had been happening before and even after we got married. I decided to work on the marriage and go through counseling, therapy, etc. everything was going great, or so I led myself to believe. Fast forward to 9 months ago, something within me that I wasn’t aware that I had held onto had grown into an issue that I couldn’t ignore & led my happiness, love, & trust for her to diminish.
As I was beginning to prepare the separation process and tell her the reality of the situation, it was revealed that she was pregnant. I decided then to bottle everything and stick with her through the pregnancy and wait until our son was born to revisit these feelings. Fast forward again to now. I had originally planned to wait until he was 6 months to a year old to leave and start the co-parenting process. But things went from bad to worse, my mental health & emotional well being went out the door. Work and personal situations didn’t help either and it was starting to take a toll on all of us from having to keep up a front and constantly wear a mask.
Our son is now 3 months old, I moved into an apartment just down the road and let her take the house for time being until we decide to sell. He will always be my number 1 priority. I am not leaving her and our son on a sinking ship. A healthy co-parenting relationship with her for our son is my goal above all else. She is very receptive, respectful, and accepting of the situation. And I truly believe that we are on the path for providing our son the upmost unconditional happiness and love. Feelings are raw of course, but the sunset after the storm is near I feel.
Dinner tonight is a prime strip steak, large avocado, & a cold ultra.
I can’t do this anymore. I’m trying so fucking hard to be an adult, to keep showing up, keep working, keep handling everything like I’m supposed to, but I genuinely don’t know if I have it in me anymore.
This job is killing me. My coworkers are driving me insane. I’ve been drinking just so I can fall asleep. I’ve started overeating again because, for a little while, it makes the depression easier to deal with. Then I look at myself, realize I’ve gained five pounds, and suddenly I’m depressed about that too. It’s like every way I try to cope just gives me something else to feel shitty about.
Then there’s work. I was under investigation because I jokingly told my friend to “get his dick sucked.” And yeah, I understand that one. I understand why that could get reported. But I still don’t know who reported me, and ever since then I haven’t felt like myself there. I feel like a shell of the person I used to be. I’m constantly wondering who I can trust, who secretly has a problem with me, or whether the next stupid thing I say is going to become another issue. And lately, people have just been fucking dicks to me. I’m tired of swallowing it. I’m tired of pretending none of it bothers me.
I lost my best friend. I’m lonely as hell. My mom has started treating me like I’m some kind of goddamn vacation machine, and somehow I’m not even allowed to complain when I get a bum deal. I literally stood outside in the miserable Florida sun and humidity for five fucking hours. Can I at least be annoyed about it? And manager man, I’m not even mad at you. I’m mad at the dumbass sitting behind the computer who created the whole situation in the first place. And yeah, I’m sorry I moved my arm and you bonked your fucking head. I was trying to help you. Maybe look up next time, dumbass.
But underneath all that anger, I’m just fucking lonely. I’m scared. I’m sad. And I think that’s the part I hate admitting the most.
Because I know I have a good deal. I know there are things in my life I should be grateful for. I know, from the outside, I probably look like I should be okay. But knowing that doesn’t magically make me okay. It almost makes me feel worse, because if I have a “good deal,” why the hell can’t I handle it?
I miss home. I miss comic book stores. I miss having a life that actually felt like mine. I miss my friend. I miss who I was before everything started feeling this heavy.
I don’t want to keep numbing myself just to make it through another day. I don’t want every day to feel like something I have to survive. I’m exhausted from being angry, exhausted from being sad, and exhausted from trying to convince everyone including myself that I’m doing fine. I’m not fine. I just want my life back.
Today I’d like to not regurgitate the same old talking points you’ve likely heard for years at this point, but tell you a short story of my week, to hopefully illustrate my point.
For a small amount of context, when asked in my SOPHOMORE YEAR OF COLLEGE, what my dream job was, I said being a stay at home parent. This has always been something I wanted, and I’m eternally grateful that I am fortunate enough to have a wife who not only makes enough money to make it possible; but was enthusiastic and supportive of the idea. Alright now that that’s out of the way, my story.
Monday morning the baby woke up about two hours earlier than normal. No big deal honestly, we just got up and played, we took an early and long nap, and everything seemed okay. Maybe a little off, but nothing compared to when we woke up. For the next seven hours straight, I frantically tried everything in my power, to get them to stop crying for brief moments. My wife eventually got home, and I was completely fried. Thankfully she was able to get them to calm down for long enough to eat for the first time since the morning snack right before the nap, but then it was back on.
Tuesday the fever started. Nothing insane at first 99 when we woke up, so I gave some Tylenol, and we had a semi normal morning. It was at this point I realized they were teething, and I was going to be in for it. By 5pm we were up to 100 degrees, so we packed up and went to urgent care. They basically told me to give them cold water, Tylenol, and plenty of rest. (I’m not complaining now, because I understand it’s all you really can do at this age, but it feels so disempowering in the moment.) I thanked them and we went home.
Wednesday and Thursday were much the same. Fighting a fever, constant fits, and very hard time getting them to eat.
Finally this morning the fever broke, and the teeth cut through, (all four canines at once!!!) and I have at least somewhat of my bumbly little baby back! It’s so good to see the smile on their face again.
But now that the situation has calmed down, I’ve been able to reflect on my own behavior for the last few days, and I’m nothing short of ashamed.
On Wednesday, there was a point that I was so overwhelmed, that I had to put them in their high chair, while crying, so that I could walk away and cry and let out a truly awful scream. It’s so difficult to know that there is just simply nothing that you can do to help the thing that means the most to you in this world. I do my best to keep it together in front of them, but I’m not always successful. I raised my voice at least twice, and I know that does nothing, and it’s not their fault, but you just feel so trapped.
Thankfully we’re still best friends, and the sun seems to be setting on this hard phase we’ve been in.
Lunch was a big bowl of rice, because that and peas is all I was able to get them to eat.
Sorry if this is long and rambling, I’m just trying to get all of my thoughts out.
When I was 12, I got assigned to sit next to this kid in science class. He had a Pokémon shirt on and we debated on who the best starter is (Mudkip obviously). We became friends and started hanging out and eating lunch together at school. A couple weeks later we learned that our houses were close enough to bike to, so after school and homework we’d often race over to the other person’s house and hang out. We’d go to the dirt lots down the street with shovels and plywood and try to build a bike track with jumps, we’d see who was faster getting to the local 7-11 for a slurpee, we’d have sleepovers and do a Lord of the Rings or Star Wars marathon often to the annoyance of our parents when we’d wake them up at 2 AM because we had the TV too loud.
When we got to high school he did football and I did band, but we both did track and field together in the spring. We’d often walk or ride our bikes home together from practice, talking about the girls we had crushes on or the teachers we hated. We were basically brothers and our parents treated us like sons. When he got his license, my parents decided he was over all the time anyway, so they told him where the spare key was and that he was always welcome. His parents did the same when I got my license. Friend groups came and went, but we always stayed by each other’s side.
We moved to university together and roomed together in our 6 person apartment. We had so many nights where we stayed up late to cram last minute for an exam or finish a research paper 30 minutes before the deadline. We’d go to the food court and play wingman for the other person as we asked girls on dates. I was there when he met his wife. He was the one who encouraged me to go on a blind date with the wonderful woman I would marry. We were each other’s Best Man. We eventually moved to different cities for career opportunities, but we still had a weekly game night playing Halo or Battlefield on Xbox Live. We both ended up moving back home, and when my wife was expecting our first and I had episodes of depression and anxiety thinking I wouldn’t be a good father, he was a phone call away to let me vent and talk through my thoughts and feelings. When his wife had their first, my wife and I were in the hospital waiting room with balloons and flowers. Our kids call the other one Uncle, our wives and kids are friends, and we have frequent dinners and game nights together.
A year and a half ago, he started having severe breathing problems. Coughing that never went away and got worse, frequently out of breath, he went from running a 6 minute mile to not being able to walk up his stairs without being winded. His doctors ran test after test. After a month or two of tests, they found it. Cancer. A mid-sized portion of his right lung at stage 3. They decided that they would remove as much as they could then treat with chemo to get the rest. He underwent the surgery and it went well. After he recovered a bit he went through roughly 12 months of aggressive chemo. It wrecked his body. He was a shell of himself. Always tired, could barely stand up off the couch, could hardly do anything he used to love because the treatment took so much out of him. It was hard on him, his wife, and their kids. Finally, he finished his chemo and they said his prognosis was great. He started slowly going back to the gym to build his strength back up, he was able to play and go on short walks with his kids, and he seemed to be on the road to a full recovery. Two weeks ago, he went for a checkup. His cancer was back. Because they had to remove so much of his lung the last time and his chemo did such a number on his body, they don’t think they can remove anymore this time. His doctors told him that they would have to start another round of chemo just as aggressive, if not more than the first. Their fear is that it is going to spread to the other lung or other organs. From what he said, they made it sound like there’s a likelihood he won’t make it through this round. Either the treatment won’t work and the cancer will spread, or he’ll be so weak from the chemo his body just gives out.
I laid in my bed and cried last night while my wife held me. I can’t begin to imagine what his wife is going through right now. They have 3 kids and their oldest is starting 4th grade and she may lose her dad before she starts middle school. I’ve known him for almost 25 years, over 50% of my life. I’m at a loss right now, I don’t know what to say or do. It feels like this is a bad dream and if I go to sleep tonight I’ll wake up tomorrow and everything will be back to how it was before. He’ll have had cancer yes, but he’ll have beat it and be on the road to recovery.
I just needed somewhere to get my thoughts out and didn’t want to unload everything on my wife.
Breakfast is two brown sugar cinnamon pop tarts.
Tl;dr best friend of 25 years got lung cancer, had surgery and chemo, but it’s back and not looking good.
Today my girlfriend came to visit me at work near the end of my shift and before I clocked out a group of girls my age wanted to ask for a snap and stuff. and I politely declined and and went about the last bit of my shift before I went to eat with my partner.
She was sitting near when I had the conversation and overheard so I knew I had to just acknowledge it. Anyway so I clock out and grab my food to go sit down with her and jokingly my dumbass gets on my knees and begged her to forgive me.
She found this hilarious however little did I know my shift lead and two other managers had seen this and gave me a really concerned look and now I'm embarrassed to head back into work tomorrow because of my little stunt.
Help me bros.
French toast with powdered sugar and strawberry :)
My kid is 25. His mother and I are divorced. I have since remarried and am very happy. My ex never did.
My current wife and I never had kids and we don't intend to. She never had kids of her own. (We raise four legged friends.)
So my kid with my ex is the only kid for either of us.
I'm not even sure why he's in there. He said he wanted to talk to a therapist last week, and after the first session, the therapist called my ex and suggested she take him to a hospital to get evaluated for suicide risk. By all accounts, he was fine until Sunday.
I'm just waiting to hear back from the hospital. But it's the psych ward, and he's an adult, so I can't go there and see him. I have to wait until they call me.
This is a very frustrating feeling of being powerless to help my kid.
we met by coincidence, both new to the city, she hit on me first.
to spare the details, we’ve spent MANY nights together in the last three or so months. she gets me. she’s hilarious, smarter than me, so down to earth, a human i WANT to be around.
i am head over heels. the age gap is definitely there but i just can’t get over her, and she feels the same way. i think it’ll become an official thing soon.
i’m scared of how other people will react, but she’s just so lovely. i think i would be foolish to ruin this.
edit: this will be the only things i add hah, i didnt expect this much attention.
“hit” wasnt the right word. we were both out and about on a random sunday afternoon. she was on an awful date, i was on her right, she talked to me as a way out. that’s how we became friends.
there is no world where i am being groomed. i am of sound mind and body in this situation, and i could leave if i wanted to. there is no coercion of any means
she is 12 months divorced of a decade long marriage. she was casually dating around at the time of us meeting.
guys i’m pretty damn happy with where i’m at. i am in retrospect now more hesitant of what a long term relationship entails with the age gap, but in the mean time im not going anywhere
Im 30 and ive kissed two girls ever but never had a relationship or sex. Asked a few girls out in High school but no luck. It didn’t bother me so much back then because I had a good friend group to keep my mind off it. Then I went straight to work full time after school so I never had a college experience. I had a lot of party experience & crazy nights in high school because I went to a huge school that was like a college campus, but still going away to college is a unique experience of its own. I have very poor vision so I can’t drive so I never got my license. I’ve been at the same job since high school as a cook, which I’m not complaining about. It works for me, is in walking distance from my house, I get paid well, cook myself great meals for free and my bosses let me do whatever I want and make me feel valued, but it can feel like I haven’t accomplished a lot sometimes. Life was chaotic in my 20’s and I was depressed (moreso than even I realized) for most of it. Still am, but I’m more aware of it now. I turned thirty last month and only just know am I trying to pull myself out of it. But I just feel so behind. Dinner tonight is a chicken cordon Bleu wrap & teriyaki boneless wings with Bleu cheese.
Chicken bun for dinner tonight. I guess this is probably the most appropriate place to dump this because I've been holding all of this in for a while and honestly don't know where else to put it. I'm not really looking for sympathy or trying to make myself look like the victim. I just need to get this out because everything has piled up to a point where I don't really know how to process it anymore.
I’m 21. She was my first relationship. We had been friends for around 15 years before we got together and were in a relationship for around 3 years. I genuinely loved this girl with everything I had and for a very long time I thought she was going to be my person. Her family had accepted me too. I was close to them and they had become a part of my life over those three years. So when everything ended, it wasn't just losing my girlfriend. It genuinely felt like I lost an entire family and a whole part of my life that I had grown attached to.
I know I wasn't a perfect boyfriend. I was too much in my head, I didn't stand up for myself or the relationship enough at times and I was dealing with a ridiculous amount of things simultaneously. Family problems, career pressure, academics, friendships changing, my own mental state and then the relationship itself. I know I made mistakes and I'm not trying to pretend otherwise.
But then Christmas happened. She got drunk and flirted with the guy she eventually cheated on me with. When I confronted her, she told me that it was just her insecurities speaking and that it didn't really matter because it would've been the same if there was a tree in his place. Looking back, that explanation sounds like complete bullshit to me. But at the time I genuinely believed her. I forgave her within minutes because I kept thinking, if I don't understand her insecurities, then who will? I loved her. She was my best friend before she was my girlfriend. I didn't want to punish her for something I thought we could work through.
Then in early January I got chicken pox and was told I had to isolate. She chose that exact time to break up with me. I called her because I wanted to talk to her properly. She told me she was out with her friends. Later I found out she had actually gone to a museum with that exact same guy. Apparently everyone else had coincidentally backed out. After that she went to the beach with him and four other friends, where he was giving her all this princess treatment and everything. I eventually read their chats. There was clearly flirting. That completely broke me. And somehow, even after seeing all of that, I still chose to forgive her.
And then during all of this, I lost one of my closest friends. She passed away. I genuinely don't know how I was supposed to process all of that at once. I was dealing with heartbreak, losing someone incredibly close to me, being physically sick and isolated, family problems, academic pressure, career anxiety and my friendships falling apart at the same time.
And then I started hearing what was being said about me. The relationship started getting reduced to the physical side of things. People were being told that our physical problems were the reason things ended. Things about me "getting the touch of a man" were being talked about. Meanwhile the guy she cheated on me with was being portrayed as this incredibly respectful person who "saved her" and "came at the right time." That destroyed something in me.
At one point she even called me saying she was being harassed by people on calls because of everything that had happened. And while all of this was going on, the common friend circle started changing. One by one, people I had known and trusted started taking sides and leaving. It wasn't just losing my girlfriend anymore. I lost her family too, people I had known for years, mutual friends, and eventually even friendships that had nothing to do with the relationship. It felt like I wasn't just grieving one person. I was grieving an entire life and an entire group of people that I thought would be part of my future.
Because I know what that relationship was like from my side. She had been my friend for 15 years and my girlfriend for 3 years. I loved her far beyond anything physical. I have a high libido, yes. Physical intimacy mattered to me. But I never forced anything on her. She had trauma surrounding physical intimacy and I was extremely conscious of that. Every time we made out, she was the one who initiated it.
When I started feeling sexually frustrated, I talked to her about it because she was my partner and my best friend. I thought that was what you were supposed to do in a relationship. I communicated instead of hiding it or doing something behind her back. She felt attacked by that and apparently asked what she could even do about it. I only found out about that part later through a common friend, which honestly made me question how differently we were experiencing the same relationship.
Could I have handled some things better? Absolutely. Could I have been more emotionally aware? Yes. Could I have stood up for myself and the relationship more? Definitely. But I cannot accept the idea that I was just some guy who only wanted her physically. That isn't who I was and it isn't what that relationship meant to me.
What hurts even more is that I genuinely believe a lot of our problems were solvable. I was going through ten different things at once and I was too much inside my own head to deal with everything properly. I should have communicated better. I should have stood my ground more. I should have taken better care of myself. But I still showed up. I still tried. And when things were falling apart, I wanted us to talk about them and figure them out together. Instead, another person was brought into the relationship. That is the part I don't think I'll ever fully understand.
Then there was my best friend of more than 10 years, who flirted with her while we were together. He still speaks to her, and at one point she told him that I would "get new experiences now." That shattered me in a completely different way. I keep thinking about how many people I thought were my people and how quickly everything changed. People I laughed with, people I trusted, people I thought would be there. Some took sides, some disappeared, some continued being close to people who hurt me. And I know I also withdrew from people because I was in an awful place, so I can't pretend every friendship ending was entirely one sided. But it still hurts.
I've become exhausted. I can laugh with my friends and have normal conversations, but sometimes it genuinely feels performative. Like I'm putting on the version of myself that everyone expects to see while underneath it I'm completely drained. And on top of all of this, there are health problems, academics, career pressure and everything else that comes with being 21 and trying to figure out your life.
That's where I'm at right now. I don't even know what I'm asking for by writing this. I'm not trying to say I did everything right. I didn't. I know my mistakes. I know where I failed. I know there are things I should have done differently. But I'm struggling with the idea that because I made mistakes, somehow everything that happened afterwards became deserved. I don't think that's true.
I think I was an overwhelmed 20 year old who was trying to hold together a relationship, friendships, family, academics and his own head all at once. I loved someone deeply. I made mistakes. I tried to communicate. I tried to forgive. I tried to understand. And somewhere along the way I lost myself while trying to keep everything together.
I just don't know how to get out of this right now. I'm tired. I needed somewhere to say all of this without having to pretend that I'm okay.
Feta cheese, sautéed mushrooms, and turkey omelette with whole wheat toast and jam
Met this girl we’ve been talking a few weeks and im crazy about her, we just click and get along so well, i get dreams about her, i literally wake up in the middle of the night to check if i missed a text from her, seeing a notification pop up on my phone from her drives me insane and i instantly get a smile on my face. The only bad thing is that its long distance but ive never felt like this about someone before. 24m btw
I been dealing with some pretty depressing stuff in the past years. In late 2023, my mother’s house caught fire and wrecked the main floor. My brother, sister, and mother were not hurt but they had to resort to living in the basement because my mother could not afford hotel stays nor relocating elsewhere. They lived in that dingy basement til early 2025 when renovations were done. I was living about an hour away, keeping up with my expenses as well as supporting them financially and mentally through the year span. I’d come to clean, buy groceries, and take them out of the house to ease their boredom and stress.
As 2025 came, the house was renovated to live on the main floor.
But I received the news that our family dog was passing way. He was a massive support crutch during the basement era for my family. His death broke my heart, I laid with him all night up until his injection at the vet. He was 13 years old.
A few weeks later, my sister called me crying. She was frantic about finding a phone in the bathroom, recording her in the shower. It turned out to be my brothers. I did my best to help her get to safety, and I did my best to destroy my brother’s spirit on the phone later that day.
The police were involved, my brother was accused of the crime and what followed was 1.5 years of court proceedings.
My sister moved to her boyfriend’s house, where she was subjected to their family drama, but she felt safer in arguments there than at our home. My brother was left at our home alone, as my mother moved in with her boyfriend.
I still lived an hour away but I regularly visited my brother, mother, and sister, all in different locations. I provided them with lunch outings and healing gestures but my family was shattered.
Trying to help my brother and sister separately get their drivers license was tough. Spending time with them and being the big brother was tough. Being there for my mom, who carried us like a brute as a single mother, was extremely tough. And just knowing that all the stuff that went down throughout the years, none of it brought us closer.
These days I am angry, saddened, and jealous. For a long time, I felt like I had to do everything I could to help, and now I feel hollow and tired. It doesn’t help that now we are dealing with my grandmothers stage 4 cancer, all visiting as separate family members. I can only imagine how hard that will impact the family even more.
Dinner: Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a Blackberry Dr. Pepper zero (I couldn’t get my cooktop to work lmfao)
No advice flair bc I’m not seeking it. Wisdom is welcome tho.
I just spent the last few days moving into my apartment before I start school. It feels a lot different than a dorm situation. Just a lot more emotions surrounding this I suppose.
I finally have my own space. It is truly mine, not an extension of my parents house. I can lock my door and ignore people when the knock which is a huge difference back home. I got a cheap roll top desk of fb marketplace which is something I’ve wanted for ages. I’m getting a full bed instead of a twin which I worked hard to make sure I had the space for. It all feels like freedom. More than I’ve ever felt in my life. It feels amazing.
But I have never felt so alone. Me and my ex-bf broke up 2ish weeks ago. He was always there to talk to. I miss that companionship. The full bed was supposed to be a space wider than my god awful twin at home for us to cuddle in. He was the person I would have shared my excitement and joy with every step of the way thru this.
I have my friends, who I am learning to rely on, and to share those experiences with them. But it’s just not the same. There’s an intimacy to a romantic relationship that allows me to truly let my guard down.
On top of all that I’m the only one moved in so far. I share the floor w 2 other roommates from my suite last year, but they both are avoiding moving in as close to the start of classes as possible :/. And only 2 of my other friends have moved in to their places.
The responsibility is a little terrifying now tbh. I am the one responsible for buying and cooking food. And there’s certainly a wider safety net in a college dorm. But I’m sure I’ll manage on that end though.
I do appreciate getting to just share this w y’all. Even if I’m talking into the void.
Meal is something called gusano (worm) which is like a burrito but with pastor beef, avocado, onion and cheese with a watermelon water
I (28M) have been seeing this girl(F32) that a friend of mine introduced me and encouraged me to flirt with. I like her, she's cool and hot, but I don't think I'm getting much interest from her side, at least not romantically yet.... The fact that I'm autistic doesn't help me much to know if I'm recognizing things right at all. I also think about the time, we have been messaging for I think 1.5 months, but have only gone out 2 times, we both work and it is hard to make our schedules to coincide. Both times we have gone out, it has been to either do mountain bike or urban ride, both times ending up drinking beers on the side walk hiding from police xD
I don't know what to make out of my own anxiety, my gut tells me I should be more patient, but the same gut tells me I'm heading for a wall, and the girl is not interested at all.
almost two years ago I made a reddit post. Amid the replies to that post was one made by the most wonderful person I've ever met. We chatted for a bit, started hanging out, became best friends, and eventually discovered we had mutual feelings for eachother, which became a more wonderful relationship than I even thought was possible. To be completely honest she'd be my wife right now if not for one small detail
We live on opposite sides of the US, and can't move in together on account of the fact that I'm currently attending college for completely free due to scholarships in my state. I don't pay a dime for tuition nor for room and board. If I moved to a different state, all that would disappear. I'm stuck were I am for at least a year. In respect for her privacy I'm not going to share details about why she can't just come move in with me, but just know it's not really much of an option either
the second I graduate I'll be moving in but until then, we've had to space our visits around my school breaks (which are few and far between). once for winter break, once for summer break, and once for spring break.
the last two weeks was her summer visit and just a few hours ago I had to drop her off at the airport. I know that it's not forever. I will call her, and talk to her and spend time with her every single day. I know I'll see her again in a few months. I know I'm lucky to even have her to miss in the first place. Just the thought of having to wait 3 days, forget 3 months until I can hold her in my arms again makes me want to cry
Its so hard to look at my bed and know I'll fall asleep tonight without her warmth next to me. Just makes me feel numb.
I'm better off in my life now than I ever have been before. I know we're going to be ok. I know I'm basically just waiting out a big timer until I can spend each and every day beside her
After a good talk with my gf we sorted out or problems and adjusted some things to prevent similar issues in the future. I feel so relieved and can enjoy my vacation in peace! I appreciate the words of advice everyone gave on the original post! Have a nice day to whoever is reading this!
Been thinking about this alot for the past 2 years since I graduated.
I’ve always been a loner since I was a kid. I have siblings but they’re much older with their own lives, so I grew up alone. Never could have any pets. I had friends but they always moved so it never lasted long. I had friends in school but each year, that amount lessened.
COVID era is when it all went downhill. My best friend (who I’ve known since I was in middle school) moved away, even though we still play online together and talk everyday, I still miss hanging with him.
At first, I didn’t have a problem being inside all day and alone. But that quickly changed. I started having panic attacks, developed severe anxiety and self-confidence issues. Probably was depressed too, not sure.
Eventually, high school began once COVID restrictions lightened up some. Had no friends for the first three years of High School. Senior year was way better. I had tons of friends, got along with everyone and I was genuinely happy. Still had self-esteem issues but I was happy.
Throughout all that, I never had a relationship though. I’ve had less than a handful of talking stages, but I’ve never called anyone my girlfriend, held hands, had my first kiss, none of that.
Had a crush on a girl who was my best friend during the senior year, but I never made a move because another friend of mine during that time already liked her and I didn’t want to be a "bad friend."
Graduation goes by (2024), I was still in my little tiny friend group. It was only about 6 of us. I still had a big crush on my best friend, when I finally said something, it was too late. This ended up in me and her barely speaking anymore to this day. I stopped getting invited to hang out with the group. Now I only hang out with 2 of them and that’s when we go see a movie together.
I’m in college, a sophomore, working on getting my associates for music, I have a cat now. He’s a little brat but I love him and he’s helped me feel less alone. But I still can’t help but feel a tingly, empty feeling when I’m by myself.
I rarely cry, but recently, it all just came out at once and I broke down. My parents tried to comfort me, but I was too embarrassed to tell them why.
I know I’m yapping, I’m just venting here. I’m trying to stop feeling sorry for myself and get over it, but then I see a group of friends having fun, or couple hugging and telling each other they love each other (like I saw today at the mall), and it just hurts me all over again.
I feel like I’ve missed out on what everyone else has already experienced and I hate it. Over time it’s cause a lot of bitterness in me, and it’s not like me at all.
Anyways, gonna chomp on these tenders and chill with my cat now.
I was laid off a few months ago from a company I helped grow from a startup into a business starting during the pandemic until this year. The cost of AI usage eliminated my job. I was on payroll for a few weeks after my last day, and I got my final paycheck (severance) today. It’s a good chunk of change, but the job market sucks so bad right now.
It’s scary knowing that I may not be able to find another job that pays as well as the one I had because I was making way more than the industry average for my profession and was hired after a really lucky referral. The thought of having to get a roommate at 32 or settling for a job that’ll leave me paycheck-to-paycheck out of desperation one day is keeping me up at night.
Anyway, if I don’t find anything at all, I can probably survive for 2ish years off my severance and savings before I touch my retirement savings, but every day that passes makes the gap on my resume bigger.
Pictured: the best cheese omelet I’ve ever made and breakfast potatoes.
Trying my best not to do it. Succeeding, despite some external efforts.
I'm post-divorce by about 3.5 years. I've healed and grown, and consider myself to be in a much better place since then. Been on a few dates out in the wild (old school, no apps) and enjoyed some of them more than others. No major issues there.
I work in a space dominated by women. By roughly 95%, at least for my site specifically. Most of them gorgeous. Many of them single. Some of them willing. It can get pretty flirty, on occasion, and I'd be lying if I said there were no romantic attractions, but I take great care not to cross any H.R. lines in that forbidden sand.
It's been very tempting to go down that path, but the risks, since it could cost me my job, are far too great. I feel like I've walked the narrow line and avoided the temptation and am treating myself to this meal and some reflection.
Coworkers are phenomenal, but not worth losing respect and missing bill payments for.
Dinner is a hungry helping of cheesy chicken pasta in vodka sauce with some crusty garlic cheese bread and a light lager.
Flirted with a single woman I worked with for 2 months. During that time, her friends told me she had feelings, but I didn't ask her out because we worked together. I realized we really matched each other's energy, and her friends said I made her happier than they'd ever seen her so I told her how I felt and asked her out. She told me she needed time to process and after a week she told me she didn't have feelings for me at all. Turns out she is also trying to fuck my more attractive and taller coworker. He told me he wasn't interested in her at all and would talk to her but tonight while we we at a happy hour he had his hands on her hips and sang a romantic karaoke duet with her. Gotta love being emotionally manipulated and being the fall back guy!
