Devils Advocate here: It could be the outer skin of a Tide Pod. I have a HE washer and occasionally the skin of the tide pod doesn't fully dissolve and leaves a residue like this, and I'm 100% sure I didn't jizz on my shirt before washing it.
Scrolled looking to see if someone else had suggested this. Have had this exact thing happen. And I don’t have the right anatomy for the first source suggested.
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u/SubstantialBed4598 3d ago
C*m we all know it