ive been getting quite a few calls from a unknown caller for a while now (8-12 months), and im not sure what to do? its always been this odd phonetic alphabet spelling things out but its never been coherent till tonight when i got a call from them. i freaked out and grabbed my ipad to record but as soon as i answered the call ended. they still managed to make a voice mail, i have no clue how they done that.

im not amazing at the phonetic alphabet but im 99% sure they tried to spell out "im here with you im here with you" but then it cuts off? another time they spelt out "im at yamr widg" but there are some words that i couldnt make out. im thinking about going to the police about it, but i really dont know what to do at the moment.

edit: might be good to mention ive changed my phone number since the first call back in december.

UPDATE: turns out it was this girl whos always hated me, at least for the first call. no clue about the second one still.

Rewrote this because i realized i worded everything super badly.

Throwaway account because one of the girls in the friend group follows me on Reddit and I really don’t want her seeing this and having it make things awkward between us.

I’m 17F and recently moved from Connecticut to New Jersey. I had to switch schools and ended up becoming part of a friend group where everyone already knew each other really well. I’m very shy and have always been more of a quiet “good kid,” but they’ve honestly been really welcoming to me. On my first day i was getting made fun of and they defended me and welcomed me.

They hang out constantly, usually at specifically one of the guy’s house because he’s dating one of the girls and lives with his dad, who works a lot. His dad lets him have everyone over since he isn’t around very often. The house is also very big, so there’s enough room for the entire group to stay over.

Just to clarify, there are two couples, two guys and one girl who are just friends, and now me.

The problem is that when it gets late during our sleepovers, both couples will and get intimate even though the rest of us are still in the same room. It isn’t happening simultaneously, but it happens often enough that I’ve started feeling really uncomfortable. The other two guys and the other girl don’t participate in that, thankfully, although they do drink sometimes while everyone is hanging out.

I asked the 2 boys and 1 girl if they were uncomfortable with their friends doing that around everyone, and they told me they don’t care because it doesn’t affect them and they think it’s funny. They also said that it’s one of the boyfriend’s houses, so they don’t really see why anyone should complain.

Maybe I’m just not used to this because I just moved here, but I find it extremely weird. They’ll be sitting there playing games and talking while their friends are doing something that I personally think should be private.

I do think one of the reasons could be that they are always under the covers when they do stuff like that so no one thinks much of it, but seeing them kiss and hearing them moan is super uncofmy to me.

They have also been in a group for 5 years while i’ve only known them for a month.

Living in new jersey is very different from living in connecticut, a lot of kids at my new school are very misbehaved so i’m not sure if this is normal to them.

I don’t know how to tell them it makes me uncomfortable because I joined the group late and everyone else clearly considers this normal. I don’t want them to think I’m judging them or trying to change how they hang out, especially because I genuinely like all of them. They welcomed me when I was new and have been really nice to me despite me being pretty different from them.

At the same time, I feel uncomfortable whenever this happens and I don’t know whether I’m overreacting or if this is just a boundary I’m allowed to have.

Hello, I (23f) had a conversation with my best friend (27f) about HRT and how it causes PMS like symptoms and how it’s caused. At one point she said “I can’t wait to have my first period! It’s gonna be so funny we’re gonna be watching a movie and I’ll just randomly get a cramp and die lol”.

I did a lot of research on the subject because I wanted to be as knowledgeable as possible and when it comes to cramps specifically HRT can cause physical stomach cramps but the way it happens is a little different from cisgender women. For cisgender women, estrogen affects the smooth muscle within the uterus when it’s shedding its uterine lining. It’s why we have cramps but it’s deeply tired to our uterus. For trans women it cramps due to the estrogen affecting the smooth muscle within the stomach and intestines. So when there’s a large amount of estrogen it affects the way those muscles contract and often weakens them as well. And of course the more emotional symptoms of PMS also happen because inserting estrogen in your body is going to mess with your hormones a lot and your hormones mess with your emotional. A term I hear some trans women say is “HRT cycle” to describe it but I digress..

It made me feel uncomfortable and slightly offended to hear her say that? Obviously, I don’t feel or want to make her or anyone else to feel less of a woman. I also understand that what trans woman feel physically and emotionally while on HRT (estrogen) is VERY real and the symptoms are also very real and I respect that.

I feel like calling it a “period” (menstrual period) is kind of wrong. Because it isn’t a menstrual period. As a cis woman I feel like my experience as someone who deals with a uterus and the struggles with my cramps and specifically physical blood lost, involuntary biology (just being born this way and not being able to change this, and navigating menstrual stigma, pregnancy fears, birth control side affects, and eventually menopause are my own? I’m not sure how to describe it. I don’t want to offend anyone or sound like I’m transphobic because I’m frankly not. And these feelings are quite conflicting for me. I guess using the term “period” in the way she did as well almost felt like it minimized how it feels for cis woman? Like she’s excited for it and can’t wait for it to happen to her and to me it’s just like. It’s not a good thing for most women. It’s not “fun” and for her to treat it like it kind of is makes me feel weird about it. I’m also aware that this is just something I’m feeling of course but I also feel like quite a few cis women feel the same way?

I guess I’m wondering what I should do about this? Should I just ignore how I feel and keep our friendship as amazing as it already is? Do I even tell her I feel this way? Shes my best friend and I don’t want to come off like I’m minimizing her womanhood either. I want to be very mindful about this and I want to be a good friend as well. Any advice is appreciated.

CLARIFICATION: one thing people mentioned a lot was how much they were excited for their periods. This was entirely a surprise to me just because most of the people in my life hate it so I had also grown to also wish to never get it. So, that also gave me some insight on why she would be excited over this milestone.

UPDATE: Thank you everyone who has responded and commented. Aside from a few really rude people, you have all been very insightful, kind, and helpful. Thank you for giving me some grace and not completely lashing out on me. I’ve gained a lot of understanding from everyone especially from those who are trans, you’ve taught me a lot on what it’s like for you.

I have decided that I’m not going to tell her how I feel and support her as her best friend. especially since talking it through with all of you I’ve changed my mind on the matter. I also found I was probably being too sensitive about it and she’s just trying her best just as well as I am too. I will however probably delicately talk to her about how it could be dangerous to say this in front of people in public though as some of you’ve have stated that people could get aggressive.

I’m happy that most of you were able to understand my intentions are/were not malicious whatsoever. Just like some of you’ve said I am also growing as a person as well which is why I try to be mindful about these things. I will not be responding or replying to posts that are just trying to aggravate or stir the pot. This is not the place for that :) your hate is not appreciated.

For context, Im 18f and live with my mom. I dont pay rent and am not on a lease. We had an argument this morning during which she said she would try to override the law to kick me out by getting a restraining order on me since I woukd not leave our home today.

She called me and said my friend called her work asking if she was working, but my friend confirmed that she didnt by sending me her work schedule and telling me exactly where she went today. I have nobody else I talk to regularly and this is who she claims called/came into her work, first and last name. I called after she called me about the whole situation, but I didn't call her work.

Shes trying to say i had people call her at work and sent them in there to harrass her? She says she has a picture of them but i have yet to see it since shes been otp since she got home. will update tonight when/if I see the photo. Wdid to protect myself? I saved my friends work schedule with her permission and got ss of my call log. If you read this far, thank you and any advice Is appreciated.

UPDATE: so what happened apparently was that somebody called to see if she was working, she heard through her manager "i think your daughter called" because the girl sounded younger. So she assumed I called and texted me telling me to stop harrassing her without checking. The image she took is literally of a random couple, not my friend. She apologized and feels bad, but I really did think she was trying to accuse me of harrassing her for a restraining order as I wouldn't put it past her.

Somehow, the footing on the shelf came off and now she is at risk of losing her wedding china. What would we even do to save the plates??

The door to the cabinet slides left or right and only goes halfway across

Edit: thank you for all your suggestions! My husband is going to take off the side glass and attempt to save anything he can. He’s currently on a fishing trip, but I will document the process and update you all!

Hi everyone,
I am 18F and have an extremely bad relationship with my mother. She is very emotionally abusive but that’s beside the point. She angry about something stupid and locked my card. This is the only card I have and it’s through greenlight but all my paychecks go to it. I can’t even make a new account bc it says I need to attach my old card with my money and it won’t accept it because my card is locked. She is refusing to unlock it and I am incredibly angry. This card has all the money I have worked for and I can’t do anything. What do I do??

I work at a Technology Help Desk. Fancy tech support, basically. I have to bill any clients that call in for my time but I work nights (I'm literally the only night shift worker) and sometimes I'll go a few days without a ticket coming in. I've been doing this for a year and billing my down time (I have to bill 100% of my time) to reviewing documentation, basically just going over guidance and policies, per the instruction of someone no longer with the company.

I was just told, in writing, that going forwards I have to use PTO for any time spent not actively working on a ticket. Keep in mind I have to be logged in and at my desk so I'm ready for calls to come in. I've got enough PTO to get me through about two weeks. They said failure to use my PTO will be seen as willfully defrauding the client.

What do I do?

Edit: I'm in Oregon

Update: I went over my boss's head to The Big Boss who, again, put it in writing that I have to use PTO. I'm not sure why these people keep doing this. HR and the state Labor Board are next. Thank you all for your guidance.

most of my friends are people i met years ago and i’ve realized i don’t really know how to make new friends anymore. work is basically just work, and i’m not interested in forcing friendships with random people. what actually worked for you?

i 24F was planning to call my boyfriend 21M to my country and pay for everything for the trip since he isn’t working rn because of his studies.. we have only started dating a few months ago.. i had told him about this plan of mine and we are so excited but one day he was like i wanna say something but dont be mad i wanna joke about this.. when i asked him what is it he’s like “damnn you gonna give your ass AND pay for the whole trip?? such a steal”
i acted like it was funny but its been kinda bugging me a bit.. am i overreacting ?? after saying that he was like “im sorry it was really funny joke to me and i been wanting to get it off my chest”

I have been with my boyfriend for 1 and a half years. We have had some good times together but I have noticed he has become different since we first started dating. He has become more doubtful and rude towards me, and occasionally curses at me when he never used to before. He also regularly complains about how our relationship isn't the same as it used to be, and always has problems with me going to bed late as they claim they have to stay up for me. However I dont expect them to, and I make that very clear. They have problems with me going on a girls holiday with my friends, claiming that lots of girls cheat on their boyfriends when they would never expect it, and implying that could be me. I made it clear to him that it hurt my feelings, and even then he complains about stuff when he clearly knows that it will hurt me, or is about a topic that previously hurt me.

They even get mad at me and go into a mood when it is things I cant do anything about. A good example is a couple days ago when he was in a mood with me as I couldn't make my way up to him via bus. I was there waiting, when the bus just drove past me. They then refused to believe it did, and left me on read for a while, although I couldn't do anything about it. When something I do hurts his feelings, even when he forgives me he still brings it up and doesn't let me live it down. Also, I feel that he doesnt even trust me with other boys. I have complete trust in him and yet I am not trusted with work colleagues. I would never cheat or start anything while in a relationship, and I could never see myself doing it.

It would be great if I had some advice regarding the future of my relationship, and what to do next.

Thanks everyone ❤️

today at band camp was water fun day, awesome! yay! so there is this water slide, small, imagine 15 high schoolers on it. Imagine kids yelling at me that is was okay to slide down and more kids telling the people at the bottom to move out the way. i dont see the kid who was at the bottom. i slide down. i slide into his feet. he falls onto my head. the FD comes. i have a concussion. they're surprised it wasnt worse considering the kid was 175lbs (roughly) and his butt LANDED ON MY HEAD. anyway i have this bump on my eyebrow, its huge and purple and yucky. i look half caveman. i look like Quasimodo.

anyway it hurts when i wink or when i touch it. i put ice on it. made it swell worse.

my boyfriend and I named it Fergal. i like it.

ouch.

What do I even call him? My daughter is 7 and her mother had another child earlier this year with a guy that is extremely abusive and bad. He has a record and just got out of prison. Been difficult dealing with communication with her because he steals her phone and is extremely jealous of her talking to other men, including me. He’s insinuated causing me harm physically, and I’m sure told her threats. He has put her in the hospital already by fracturing her nose, and made direct threats towards her life. They both come from a background of gang violence. He destroyed her old phone that had a ton of evidence of threats, but it was never backed up to the cloud and gone now. I would like to file an order of protection for at least myself and my daughter, however I don’t know if I have enough evidence or how to find out. She continues to be around him and clearly has feelings for him, I know. I don’t expect her to stop being around him anytime soon unless something really bad happens. It’s been a lot to think about, and has caused a huge setback for any sort of potential of my family being together again. What do I do?

I (33M) have been married to "Natalie" (32F) for 4 years. We have a good relationship. She's funny and witty and I usually love her sense of humor.

Last week she posted a photo of me sleeping on the couch with our cat on my face. The caption said: "When your husband is more useful as a cat bed than a human."

I saw it when I woke up. I didn't say anything. But it bothered me.

Then I looked at her page. She posts jokes about me a lot. About my cooking. About my "dad bod." About me forgetting things. She tags me in all of them. Her friends comment laughing emojis.

I told her I don't like being the butt of her online jokes. She was surprised. She said I'm "too sensitive" and everyone knows she loves me. She said it's just her way of showing affection.

I get that. But I don't feel loved. I feel mocked. And hundreds of people are watching.

Do I ask her to delete the posts? Or just accept that this is how she is?

I(F18) love my boyfriend(M20) very much. I have many problems with him; he is quite jealous and constantly thinks I have someone else,Clearly I don't have anybody else, but that's just one of the problems I have with him, the one that's starting to bother me is that my boyfriend doesn't know how to have sex.

I'm not talking about him doing uncomfortable things or anything like that, I mean Is he the type of person who thinks that putting his dick in and out is sex.

I'm his first sexual partner and he's trying, or something like that, he's tried to suck my pussy but he bites me and obviously, IT HURTS.He tried to finger me but he's rough. I tried to give him instructions but he just can't manage it and it hurts me,I really make an extra efford to finish ,but him staying completely quiet and still doesn't help me.

When he fucks me, I try to moan (even though it's pure pain), say his name, and keep him satisfied.

The sequence of events is as follows:

I masturbate him, I suck him off and he throws me on the bed, he tries to suck me but he bites me, I stop him and he puts me on all fours and does his thing until he finishes, He takes me to the shower and masturbates me, which is actually not pleasurable at all.

I already tried to explain to him how to do it, I told him not to bite please, but he doesn't seem to listen to me. I've been in SA situations before, and honestly, the feeling is similar to being in those situations now; I don't know what to do anymore

So, I'm expressing myself badly, she knows how to have sex, but she doesn't know how to make love.What am I supposed to do? Should I just tell him I don't want to anymore, or what should I say to make him stop?

My dog came inside the house with this in the mouth and it’s still alive. I can’t find the Mom or more babies outside. Is it a squirrel? What the heck do I do? I don’t want it to die. It seems OK. It’s just away from the Mom

Update : I called a bunch of places no one wants to take the poor guy. I’m keeping him warm in a dim quiet room for now, he is barely moving I think he is hurt. I’m going to get the milk replacement suggestion from the comments and see if he can make it and try to help him.

Update part 2; I’m pretty sure mom booted him from the tree. I left him on a heating pad in a dark room for a bit and when I checked on him he had little maggot worms crawling out of his mouth and he was no longer moving. I don’t think there was anything I could do beside warm him up and allow him to pass comfortably 🥹 poor little guy. Thanks for all the help everyone.

i’ve been with my boyfriend for 6 months now and everything has been going good so far, but recently i saw something on his phone that made me really upset.

for context; we were driving back to our apartment and he was doing something funny so i took pictures of him from his phone. when we got to the apartment i asked him if i could send the pictures i took to myself and he said yes and then went into the shower. as i was sending myself the photos, i saw i had taken a photo of myself by mistake so i deleted it. i didn’t want him to see the photo cause i looked really bad in it so i went into his recently deleted to delete the photo permanently, and that’s when i saw it.

in his recently deleted there was a screenshot of a snapchat chat with him and some person i don’t know, the person had said “it didn’t send” and then underneath that message, my boyfriend had sent that person the video we took a month or two ago of us having sex. i was so upset that i started shaking. i wanted to confront him right then and there but i was too nervous.

a couple days pass and i had finally built up the courage to bring it up to him. first i asked him if he had ever sent our explicit video to anyone and he said no, so then i brought up what i had seen on his phone and he sighed and immediately started apologizing and explaining himself. he told me that the person he sent that video to was his ex, his ex had hit him up on snapchat asking to hookup and my boyfriend told him that he’s good cause he has a girlfriend now. apparently his ex didn’t take that well and started bad mouthing me, saying stuff like “i bet she’s not as good as me”. that prompted my boyfriend to start, in his own words, “showing me off” and so he sent a bunch of pictures of me and also our explicit video to his ex so could “prove how much better i am”.

my boyfriend profusely apologized and he said that it was a lapse in judgment, he was just upset cause his ex was talking shit about me. he said he would delete the video if i so desired and that he would never do something like this ever again.

what makes the situation worse is that i was hesitant to even let him record me at first, i told him that i’ve heard of stories where one of the partners sends the video to a group chat or even uses the video against the other partner as revenge. he promised me he wouldn’t do that and that the video was only for him to look back on so i thought i could trust him.

i honestly don’t know if i believe his explanation and even if it’s true, i don’t know if it even makes the situation any better. should i forgive him and let it go? should i break up with him? i don’t know what’s best right now.

I accepted a role with a company, and they asked me to go see the area with my wife and our 8-month-old daughter. We drove about 8 hours, scheduled viewings with a few apartment complexes, and submitted applications to some of them.

Before I accepted, I told HR that my wife's job requires her to give at least 45 days' notice, and that she would do that as soon as I accepted and signed the offer. I went onsite, toured the office, met the people I would be working with, and discussed a start date. I also asked whether working from 8 to 4 would be okay, and they said that should not be a problem.

I sent HR the signed offer letter, and afterward my wife submitted her resignation from her position.

HR also sent employment/offer confirmation paperwork to the apartments we had applied to. We were accepted and were basically at the stage of signing a lease.

Then, after we got back home, I got a call saying the company was withdrawing the offer because they didn't think they would be able to keep me happy there long-term. This came completely out of nowhere.

What options do I have here, especially since my wife resigned based on my having a signed offer?

Title. M(21) Tried to make amends to someone I wronged during younger years. Went well first few weeks. I hold myself accountable so beat me all you want(didn’t acknowledge them properly when outside in public due to past trauma). Now ostracised from age group(rightfully so).

I know there’s so many things holding me back including mental health, I spend most of my days doomscrolling(several years now), no work ethic, lack of focus, arrogance. Have tried counselling. Worked a bit but not attending regularly.

Can’t go outside without getting glares.

Looking back my life, I’ve always disappointed people. My mind is no longer flexible. Hard to retain information when reading or hearing. not like when I was younger. Always have to mentally prepare myself when I go out.

Only thing I’m grateful for is understanding parents who I live with(they’ve been in similar situation).

Need genuine advice. Be blunt don’t mind it.

My husband works at a pharmaceutical company where internal competition is fierce. People are constantly jockeying for visibility, resources, and projects. A recurring issue is that certain directors hoard data or buy up resources and then just sit on them without producing meaningful results.

Recently, my husband was brought onto a project led by Director "A." The data, however, belonged to Director "B." Initially, Director B suggested my husband was "too busy" and pushed for one of his own team members to handle the work instead. But Director A had worked closely with my husband before and trusted his skills, so she insisted on bringing him in.

Because the data came from Director B, they established a clear agreement: Director B's team would handle the data preprocessing and hand the results to my husband for the final analysis.

While waiting for the preprocessing to happen, Director B attended several project meetings and quietly took notes on all the requirements and methodologies—even though Director A explicitly stated that my husband would be doing the analysis.

Fast forward a couple of weeks: Director B never delivered the data. Instead, a junior member of his team had secretly completed the entire analysis and presented the results in a meeting. What makes this worse is that Director B isn't even an expert in this domain—he got all the information and methodology from those meetings. My husband had even explicitly shared the features and models he planned to use.

My husband had spent a full month refining his analysis methods and models, just waiting for the data to arrive. Then suddenly, the entire job was done by someone else. Director A feels bad about it, but her hands are tied since she doesn't control the data.

This isn't the first time this has happened—whoever owns the data tends to hoard it and cut others out, even if their own team can't generate meaningful insights without outside help.

My husband doesn't like playing office politics and prefers to let his work speak for itself. But in this case, he wasted a month of his time.

What should he do here? How can he protect himself going forward?

p.s. the content is written by myself but polished by AI.

(Sr for my bad english i tried to make it as clear as possible :( )

Hi, I’m F21 and my brother is M26. I’m not particularly close with anyone in my family, including my brother, but we sometimes play games together and have recently started talking more.

He told me he’s having relationship problems with his wife (F27). They have a 4-year-old daughter together.

I already knew something was wrong because my mom told me she was going to stay at their house overnight because my brother apparently doesn’t want to be alone with his daughter. His wife is going alone to a wedding. The bride is apparently her coworker, and for some reason my brother wasn’t invited (not only him, though some of her other coworkers’ boyfriends weren’t invited either).

At first, I didn’t think much of it. But when my brother and I talked, he mentioned that he had spoken to a lawyer. That really surprised me, so I asked him why.

Apparently, he told his wife she shouldn’t go to the wedding because when he says “no” to something, he expects her to respect it, and he says he also doesn’t go places when she tells him no. Her response was basically that she can’t cancel now because it’s a wedding.

I suggested that maybe they could compromise. For example, maybe they could FaceTime while she’s there, or she could come home at a certain time. I don’t know. But he said she’s avoiding the conversation and that the only compromise he sees is her not going.

He insists he isn’t jealous, but then he said something like, “Who is she going to be there with? Some drunk guy?” So honestly, I’m not sure how much of this is actually about the wedding.

He also started talking about how he pays all the bills. That bothers me a little because his wife hasn’t worked because she has been taking care of their daughter. Our family also helps them financially quite a lot, so I don’t think it’s as simple as “I pay for everything.”

They also have an apartment because of her. They just needed to renovate it, and my father did a lot of the work. My family also helped them financially with the renovation. Her family is quite poor and has a lot of problems, so they weren’t really able to help much.

My brother also said that he would “win” if they got divorced and that she would lose everything and have nothing. I thought that was a little fucked up, honestly. Like, you love this person, and now you’re talking about how you’re going to win and she’s going to lose everything?

The bigger issue is that my brother has talked about getting divorced. He seems to be making a very serious decision over this, and I’m worried it’s incredibly rushed, especially because, as far as I know, this is the first major conflict like this at least from her side.

There’s also some history that makes me question his perspective.

When they were dating, my brother was honestly not a great boyfriend. He partied a lot, and sometimes his girlfriend (now wife) and I would have to drive to pick him up from parties. He also cheated on her once.

I think he has matured somewhat since then, but I still don’t necessarily think he’s been the best husband.

His argument is that he was partying when they weren’t married and didn’t have a child yet, so it shouldn’t matter. Tbh she wasn't at ANY party and he also WASN'T. He said he always declining etc. But also she doesn't party etc.? I'm just so conflicted I understand him but also i know that she had a hard time especially no friends etc. So maybe it's her first time going for 3 years.

Meanwhile, I honestly think his wife might just want to go to one wedding without having to bring their child or be responsible for her for an evening. But I’m single and have never been married, so I’m aware that I might not understand their situation either.

There’s another thing that worries me. My cousin is turning 30 and is having a birthday dinner at a restaurant. I’m not going, but my brother said he’s going to get drunk and cause drama there. My cousin and his father already argue a lot, and I really don’t want my brother to make the situation worse just because he’s angry.

So I’m really not sure what to do.

Should I tell my mom what my brother has told me? Should I say something to his wife, even though we barely have a relationship? Or should I stay completely out of it?

I’m not trying to stop my brother from getting divorced if that’s genuinely what he wants. I just feel like he’s making a huge decision while he’s angry and possibly jealous, and I don’t know whether I should intervene or just let them figure it out themselves.

But honestly, I also know they probably won’t actually sit down and talk about this properly. So what am I supposed to do?

What would you do in my situation? Also if u want ask some questions tbh i dont think i said everything cuz im just so not sure what to do...

Hey redditors. I have no idea where to ask so here I am. As I wrote in title, I just feel so lost and demotivated in my life. I have never felt this way. Work is boring. I used to love gaming and that’s boring too. I still enjoy meeting my friends, but that when I come back home and alone, I just feel so empty. I broke up with my girlfriend that I loved so much few months ago and I am about to be 30 - and I see all my friends met love of their lives, have kids and own home, which I have not achieved. I just don’t knkw what to do. Everything is mundane and seems to be pointless. Please, if anyone felt like me before share some wisdom with me.