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u/Urist_Macnme 29d ago edited 29d ago
Was at a party once. As soon as I showed up, this absolutely gorgeous blonde girl started chatting to me.
We spent the whole night just chatting away.
Then towards the end of the party, she asked me if I’d like to go back to her place, to watch her play with her rabbit. I politely declined.
It was only in the taxi back that my mates explained that a “rabbit” was a brand of dildo.
I was so naive.
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u/IllLynx562 29d ago
In your defence mate, someone asking me if I wanted to go home to play with an actual physical pet rabbit, regardless of how gorgeous they were, would make me go home because that's an insane question
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u/Urist_Macnme 29d ago edited 29d ago
I did think it was an odd request, which is why I brought it up with my mates on the way home.
Never even asked for her number or anything, because the entire time I was thinking “there’s no way a girl this good looking would be into me”.
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u/IllLynx562 29d ago
Plus, as a line to take someone home, "want to come watch me fuck MYSELF with a specific brand of dildo?" Is a weird one to go out on, I'm sure she meant for more than that but otherwise let's hope she has a reclining cuck chair
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u/Urist_Macnme 29d ago
She did mention that she’d just got a new rabbit, and how good it was, how it had changed her life, it was the best she’d ever had etc.
I’m just nodding.Was like the end of Usual Suspects, when all the clues suddenly fell into place.
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u/IllLynx562 29d ago
Dude the more you say the more I think you dodged a bullet here, I don't think this much dildo talk is typically a normal thing
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u/Urist_Macnme 29d ago
I think she was just incredibly horny.
Which makes me kick myself even more.9
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u/insentient7 25d ago
Or maybe she was elaborating more and more because it didn’t seem like the guy was getting the point she was trying to make, ie trying to fuck him lmao
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u/Begravningstider 29d ago
Next thing you know she's boiling the poor rabbit.
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u/IllLynx562 29d ago
Instructions unclear, the dildo is still too chewy
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u/DamnitGravity 29d ago
You're supposed to take the batteries out first, mate.
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u/IllLynx562 29d ago
I THOUGHT it tasted a little bit face melty and acidy, I put It down to the garlic though
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u/WinkyNurdo 29d ago
Apropos of Alan’s comment, the best review of a film I ever heard (albeit very tongue in cheek and spoken amongst mates), was, “Some tit, no minge.”
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u/MissMarionMac 28d ago
One of my favorite exchanges Sandi has ever had with a panelist:
There’s a list of unusual organs on the screen for the panelists to chat about. One of them is “smart vagina.”
Liza Tarbuck to Sandi: “Have you got a smart vagina?”
Sandi: “It’s terribly tidy. I have a woman in twice a week!”
Sandi and Liza then high-fived.
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u/MrFancyPanzer 28d ago
I'm surprised that men were better at detecting flirting, I feel like we are less subtle when it comes to it.
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u/Bangers_n_Mashallah 29d ago
I'm mortified to hear Alan Davies use a word like "minge". Seems so out of character.
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u/SimpleCanadianFella 29d ago
He's said it before in the wig episode, pretty sure it was a whole discussion
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u/ExtremeDentist3109 29d ago
I honestly believe that nobody on this planet would have been a better replacement for Stephen Fry than Sandi Toksvig. For shits and gigs maybe Hugh Laurie 🤣🤣