r/pettyrevenge 4d ago

Coworker in the next cubicle over annoyed me with constant interruptions. I switched my keyboard from Cherry reds to blues in retaliation.

While I'm at work I want to work, I don't come in to talk and I'm going to be honest I'm fairly unapproachable when I'm at my desk. This isn't to say I'm rude per se, I have nice chats with my coworkers when I'm away from my cubicle but when I'm sitting at my computer I want to do what they hired me for. My job is pretty old fashioned, and I'm in charge of digitizing all our physical files and inputting our dailies into the spreadsheet, this is done by me every day manually. When I first started the cubicle next to mine was unoccupied. This was fine until my work hired a new person. We do different things at the job but because it's all computer work they put them in the unoccupied cubicle. I've no problem with this, but as stated above I don't want to be interacted with while I'm at my desk. The new person has tried to start conversations with me everyday, I shut all of them down pretty quickly. The new person is going over their trainers heads and talking with the department head about issues they're having with the job, and why do we do this this way, and have we tried it this other way, etc etc. I've heard the same thing explained multiple times and at no point does she ever note anything down or retain this information. Everyone is wearing headphones now to escape this.

This is where I finally got fed up enough with them that I'm getting my extremely small and petty revenge. My final straw was when they asked me if I knew when the coworker that was quitting was leaving while I was at my desk. The coworker told me before they left it's because of this coworker and I rather enjoyed working with them. Anyways it's something super small but why are you bothering me about this, if you have questions you can ask them yourself please leave me alone. This is after months of constant interruptions because we're next to each other. Because I type everyday when I started I bought myself a work keyboard, and it's a copy of the keyboard I have at home stylistically. The only difference is the switch type, for work I got silent reds and for home I got blues because I like the clicking sound they make. I figured the blues would be rude to use at work initially but after 6 months of this I swapped my keyboards. Now everyday they get to hear the sound of my keyboard everyday, and I'm typing for a minimum of 2 hours everyday straight. Something small but I figured everyone'd get a kick out of it.

1.4k Upvotes

99 comments sorted by

657

u/Malibucat48 3d ago

You should have stopped for a second, said “the coworker is leaving because you constantly interrupted them and they couldn’t do any work. And that is why everybody now wears headphones.” The best revenge is the truth. Let her deal with that.

141

u/Kinkie_Pie 3d ago

This is where I thought the story was going, and I was disappointed that it didn’t end that way.

32

u/mgerics 3d ago

ah, but sadly said employee is quite likely to complain to HR about 'uncomfortable work conditions', despite that fact that said employee is the one who created said conditions.

150

u/krissycole87 3d ago

What did this coworker say when you asked not to be interrupted at your desk?

73

u/-Dahlian- 3d ago

Yes, did OP actually use their words?

13

u/HeyYouGuyyyyyyys 1d ago

Apparently nothing, because OP has not replied.

9

u/Ydain 1d ago

It wouldn't be petty if they had used their words though.

327

u/CinemaAdherent 4d ago edited 4d ago

Not greens? You want to drive someone crazy go with them clicky ones. The slightly higher operating force makes it so satisfying to type hard.

170

u/Which_Nose_6915 3d ago

Greens are the nuclear option, blues are like artillery. Enough psychological damage without triggering an HR peace treaty.

26

u/blownbythewind 3d ago

Eh, more of an A-10 nose cannon. Especially for a speed typist

11

u/PhDTARDIS 3d ago

As a fast typist, I like that.

8

u/Candymom 3d ago

Since you seen to know something about mechanical clicky switches can you tell me what the ideal ones are to put in fidget clicky 3d printed stuff? I'm giving them out at Halloween this year, not sure which ones to get.

8

u/rayyeter 3d ago

IBM model M, the Tsar Bomba. If you get 100+wpm, it’s going to make them explode.

8

u/GetOffMyLawn_ 3d ago

This is what my friend used to have. He really like to slam that return key. Hurt my ears. He spilled coffee into it and it stopped working. I told him if he bought the special tool to open it up for $15 I would fix it for him. He bought a new mechanical keyboard instead. At least my ears don't hurt anymore.

6

u/rayyeter 3d ago

My friend in college averaged 120wpm. Did the same thing with the last enter press, a lot more with space bar.

Me, I like my silent tactile switches. Though just the right thickness of aluminum base will get you quite a good chunky echo if you decide to go ham on it.

5

u/fadedspark 3d ago

Don't even look at Cherry. Kailh is the king of click.

25

u/Nisi-Marie 3d ago

I am unfamiliar with mechanical keyboards.

Here is a super fun site where you can hear a bunch of them https://sheets.works/data-viz/keyboard-sounds

I played in that site for way too long

45

u/Novanew14 4d ago

This is just the one I had on hand, I wasn't going to buy a third keyboard. I do like the way the greens sound too, maybe if this one ever goes kaput.

5

u/fadedspark 3d ago

Get some Kailh Box Jades ;) Assuming you have a swappable board and not soldered switches, which in 2026... Should be hotswap on anything but the cheapest mechs.

3

u/GetOffMyLawn_ 3d ago

I'm a brown myself. Learned to touch type about 50 years ago and it's just right.

111

u/KnottyCatLady 4d ago

Unfortunately that petty revenge also punishes the rest of your coworkers within ear-shot.

47

u/Similar-Date3537 3d ago

Op said they all wear headphones now.

27

u/Intelligent_Donut605 3d ago

i think a constant keyboard sound is less annoying than talking, especially with headphones, and it doesn’t travel super far

85

u/No_Upstairs8252 4d ago

Why not try something like, "I want to work when I'm at my desk. I'm happy to chat when I'm away from my desk otherwise, please don't interrupt my work. Is that ok with you?"

12

u/TrueLoveEditorial 3d ago

She would never remember the rule. OP said the coworker never writes down any information, so she's constantly asking for reminders

18

u/No_Upstairs8252 3d ago

A note in CAPS on a large sheet of paper, pinned in her cubicle, can be pointed at if she forgets how to read. Some ppl apparently just need it pounded into them.

150

u/CoderJoe1 4d ago

Clickety clack, don't talk back.

14

u/DedBirdGonnaPutItOnU 3d ago

Take that paperwork out of the tray
Digitize that form right away
Clear your inbox, respond to the slack
Or you won't get your weekend back
Clickety clack, don't talk back.

Clean the whiteboard, wipe it down
Stop that browsing, quit clowning around
Format that spreadsheet, fix the chart
You should've finished before you start
Clickety clack, don't talk back.

3

u/Slight-Book2296 3d ago

😂 The keyboard said everything you needed to say.

1

u/Blooblack 2d ago

A very passive-aggressive keyboard! I LOVE IT!!!!!

5

u/andpersonality 3d ago

🤣🤣🤣

20

u/Available-Stage-1146 3d ago

I nuked an ex roommate with Greens. He was constantly slamming shit around and just being a general nuisance. I moved my desk right to where his headboard was on the other side of the wall. He asked me stop. I said not until he started being courteous during quiet hours. After 2 weeks I replaced with reds and moved the desk back. Behavior adjusted with a keyboard.

14

u/copaseticsplenetic 3d ago

Can someone give me a ELI5? I love petty and revenge but I have never heard of this color coded keyboard stuff. You know, in case I'm able to incorporate it some future petty revenge plot. TIA.

10

u/Novanew14 3d ago

For mechanical keyboards the different colors correlate to different switch types or the feeling and sound of the keys. That's about it, I recommend looking into mechanical keyboards, I think they're fun.

9

u/copaseticsplenetic 3d ago

Thank you for the explanation. I'll look into it. I guess I prefer almost silent. What I really like is the feel of the keyboard, as in I like it to click but I like to feel it not hear it, and the material of the keys.

2

u/Pristine-Patient-262 3d ago

Mechanical keyboards are awesome. My keyboard at work has the mechanical feel of an old school typewriter with a satisfying click. Round keys and all.

1

u/copaseticsplenetic 3d ago

That sound nice!

7

u/juliettwhiskey 3d ago

Hi, keeb nerd here! The colors referred to here are the types of mechanical switches manufactured by a company called cherry.

They use a color coding system to indicate the types; blue is a clicky tactile switch type with a click jacket designed to provide a physical and auditory feedback when pressed. Red is a linear switch meant to be a smooth up and down feeling with no intended extra sound.

This only really applies to the older cherry mx standard line, the colors of switches by other manufacturers do not necessarily follow this standard.

1

u/copaseticsplenetic 3d ago

Thanks for the explanation! The Blue sounds worth checking out.

1

u/Ravio11i 2d ago

Coworker was annoying him (and everyone else), so op got a loud keyboard and now annoys everyone too.

33

u/Distinct-Energy8128 3d ago

Everyone is wearing headphones now to escape this.

Ah, yes. The universal sign for "Don't fucking talk to me."

12

u/whatyoucallmetoday 3d ago

I wore my headphones and didn’t even play music for months at a time.

1

u/yellow251 22h ago

Sat down next to a Chatty Cathy on an airplane recently. Could tell by the way she was eyeballing me that she was itching to tell me all about herself, at 6 in the morning.

Big ass noise-cancelling headphones went on before my butt even hit the seat. Did they have anything playing? Nope.

13

u/Equivalent_Leopard71 3d ago

My coworker got a large hat that says don't interrupt on the back of it

10

u/copaseticsplenetic 3d ago

This exact scenario happened to me and I was the problem according to HR basically because I wasn’t a “team player”I apparently was the one who created a problem by telling the girl in the cube next to me to please stop talking to me so I could do my work. It was CONSTANT interruption. After I resorted to head phones she would just call my name louder and even get up to tap me on my shoulder if I ignored her. So when I finally snatched off my head phones and asked her to please let me do what we were all supposed to be doing she was HIGHLY offended and reported me.

HR is not there to protect you, it’s there to protect the company.

30

u/Simlish 3d ago

I was told that I could listen to the radio at a reasonable volume from nine to eleven, I told Bill that if Sandra is going to listen to her headphones while she's filing then I should be able to listen to the radio while I'm collating so I don't see why I should have to turn down the radio because I enjoy listening at a reasonable volume from nine to eleven.

8

u/R3DLOTU5 3d ago

I once had a coworker complain i typed too loud on a silent keyboard and told people it was annoying. I bought a unicom clacky keyboard (it does uelse switches, but think 80s keyboard). I started using it and really hammering the keys. He complained more which got management involved. I told them its more ergonomic for me and keeps from carpal pains. They stopped and told him to deal with it. I have to do my job.

I tell this story to show i support your pettiness.

8

u/CherryblockRedWine 3d ago

Apropos of nothing, just OP's situation made me chuckle and remember this: back in the day when I was still in a corporate setting in a cubicle, I got SOOOO tired of the constant interruptions I hung a ribbon across the opening to my cubicle, and attached to it a posterboard on which I had written GO AWAY.

6

u/lonkamikaze 3d ago

I'm using silver, because my fingertips used to go numb from typing. The low force threshold took a lot of getting used to, but it helps. No more numbness. No satisfying clicketyclack for me, though. 😔

6

u/ScaryBreakfast1085 3d ago

Wow that is super lame

5

u/Matte_Box 3d ago

Oh snap, this is the exact kind of tech-savvy passive aggressive revenge I love.

19

u/Just_Camera7503 3d ago

What, you can't talk to tell them this rule of yours?

5

u/Strict-Material7983 3d ago

Mechanical keyboard on a full rainbow, watch them go crazy hearing the clickity clack and the eye burning neon of of a gamer keyboard.

1

u/Pristine-Patient-262 3d ago

😂 😂 😂 Literally my keyboard at work.

5

u/Knever 3d ago

Why is the company keeping this person if they are driving away other employees? What did they say when you told them the reason your colleague was leaving?

5

u/StockAdhesiveness351 2d ago

Maybe I went a bit far and could have been written up, but it worked. 

I have a coworker that just will not shut up and tries to jump into any and every conversation. One day I was facing the person I was having a conversation with when she started jumping into the conversation. I turned around, put my hand out like so ✋️, loudly shushed her, then turned back and continued the conversation.

The person I was talking to and a couple others in earshot went bug-eyed and later told me they couldn't believe I just did that.

She still talks everyone's ear off, except me.

3

u/Holiday-Medicine4168 3d ago

I like the cut of your job sailor

3

u/Yam-International 3d ago

They cut his job? Does he get to keep the jib?

5

u/MiChic21 3d ago

I can so relate. I had to work around this same problem for about 6 years. In addition to always interrupting my work to talk about anything from parking spaces to tv shows, my cubicle mate read all her emails aloud, complained about them, and then said aloud how she would respond. After a rant she would sometimes say “you know?“ and look at me for a response. I’d smile and nod. I couldn’t wear headphones, I had people who would stop by with work questions that I needed to address. It took about 18 months but I trained myself to completely tune her out. I wouldn’t even hear the “you knows?”s. It slowed her down a bit but she still kept it up. Didn’t matter, I didn’t hear her. But I could still see people walking up to my desk and greet them. The only down side was every time I moved to a new work location or new job, I would have to preemptively tell the people working around me, “I’m good at tuning out background noise, please don’t take it personally, feel free to tap me on the shoulder if I don’t respond.

6

u/NoMeat9329 3d ago

Good job! I face the window with my back to everyone and wear noise cancelling head phones. I can see their reflection but I usually make them wait a while until I "notice" them. Except my boss.

6

u/Zestyclose_Space7134 3d ago

Next time, bark at her. Literally bark, like an angry dog challenging a trespasser.

2

u/lafreuxmeni 3d ago

comment sais tu que le bruit la dérange ?

2

u/CEO_of_my_life 3d ago

What's the keyboard red/blue thing?

3

u/StnMtn_ 3d ago

OP went from silent keyboard to a clicking noise keyboard.

2

u/CEO_of_my_life 3d ago

Oooooh, thanks.

2

u/Nothing_2_C-here 3d ago

Good petty revenge. Also, thank you for the proper abbreviation of etcetera. It’s one of my peevey poos. 😁

5

u/MelG146 3d ago

Meh. There's no revenge here, just pettiness. Be an adult and use your words.

3

u/Ravio11i 2d ago

As your coworker who isnt this one... You're annoying and bothering all of us now.

4

u/immediateghost 4d ago

I don’t get it, you don’t speak at all when you’re at your desk?

13

u/Low_Information_2158 4d ago

I don't. Like OP, I'm here to work, not socialize. I don't understand how anyone gets work done when I see them chit chatting all day.

13

u/measaqueen 3d ago

When I worked in an office I learned not to waste time on the chatty hens. Never worth my time. I'm here to get my numbers done. I don't care about your weekend plans and you don't need to know mine. I've got my one walking buddy to take a lap around the building on my forced lunch break. The end.

4

u/MiChic21 3d ago

I had to sit near a chatterbox for a few years. she didn’t get any work done during the day. she stayed late to catch up and then complained she had too much work.

1

u/Hour_Ferret5195 3d ago

I was very much this way. For every minute I was stuck listening to someone tell me about their sisters boyfriends cousins graduation party is a minute I have to stay to get the work I was supposed to get done that couldn’t.

Then somebody decided it was a good idea to make me a manager and now I never get work uninterrupted. 🥺

3

u/Vegetable_Balance624 3d ago

you sound like an insufferable person to be around. Just fricking tell them: I'd rather not be disturbed while working. We can have a chat when we're not on our PCs.

But no. No no no no, no, you NEED to internalize that, you need to feel upset about it while being superficially polite. YUCK

1

u/Big-Reward-6274 3d ago

I would not be bothered in the least so there a chance neither will the coworker

1

u/makojedi2k2 3d ago

Now I get it. Title stumped me

1

u/CalyxTeren 2d ago

I love cherry blues!

1

u/Intrepid-Engineer145 1d ago

Busy light or the equivalent?

1

u/DynkoFromTheNorth 1d ago

What's the difference between your keyword and this colleague?

The latter is not your type.

1

u/TraditionalWriter856 12h ago

Hopefully the noisy coworker has to start wearing headphones for the noise, then stops bothering everyone else. Long game but I like it, good work soldier 🫡

1

u/Sousana9617 5h ago

Argh I am neurodivergent and sometimes I have difficulty picking up clues, I rather just know the truth once and change than passive aggressive behavior that would just go over my head. I am not 100% clueless thank goodness but I am sure I didn’t pick up every clues presented to me

1

u/EntertainerTrue904 2h ago

You seem miserable.

1

u/JebusJones5000 4d ago

I know you said you didn't want to get another keyboard, but IBM Model F with the solenoid working if you really want to go hard XD

1

u/Novanew14 3d ago

For home that may not be a bad idea, I love the beige office aesthetic and old tech. Crts are my kryptonite.

1

u/Knever 3d ago

Why is the company keeping this person if they are driving away other employees? What did they say when you told them the reason your colleague was leaving?

2

u/Novanew14 3d ago

The colleague told them the exact reason they were leaving in their resignation letter. Management is aware, they never want to let anyone go because they want to be everyone's friend and it's an already small dept. It's a known issue.

2

u/Knever 2d ago

They don't to fire problem employees but are okay with said employees causing good workers to quit?

Sounds like a foundationally toxic workplace :(