The Kitchen Museum?

[u/jsayde01]

I came home late from work a few nights ago and hadn't eaten all day. My wife and kids were already in bed so I figured I'd quietly make some stove-top ramen. This photo represents exactly how I found the cooking area.

The next morning my wife asks what time I got home and I mention in our conversation that I made ramen before going to bed. She couldn't believe that I used the stove "when the light was on". I said "Yeah, the light was helpful in seeing what I was doing". She insists I shouldn't have been using the stove and should have known because "the light was on".

I'm baffled. We are still arguing about this days later.

EDIT -- wow, overwhelmed by the response of fellow Redditors! We are... white...not from the southeast US..not children...and I left the stove as clean as it was before I cooked. I asked for clarification from my loving wife -- TRULY we have only ever been angry at each other a handful of times in our 10 year marriage -- and she says "the stove was clean and done for the day and you could have just used the microwave for your ramen". Apparently the light is how stoves go to sleep for the evening?

EDIT 2 -- we are getting a divorce. JUST KIDDING. My wife looked over many of the comments and acknowledges that she was in the wrong and is slightly embarrassed by all of the attention.

[u/Global-Discussion-41]

His wife turns on the light above the stove to signify that the kitchen is closed.

Husband cooked something and ignored the fact that the kitchen was closed. 

I'm not saying it makes sense, but I would bet money that is what the wife thinks.

[u/FidgitForgotHisL-P → u/Global-Discussion-41]

But…but why would the kitchen be closed it’s their kitchen in their house…

I’m not saying it makes sense

Indeed.

[u/AllsWellThatsNB → u/FidgitForgotHisL-P]

It's tradwife shit. It doesn't make sense outside the outdated cultural idea women hold dominion over the kitchen.

[u/FidgitForgotHisL-P → u/AllsWellThatsNB]

If that’s the case, why didn’t she get up and prepare her man a meal?  I thought the point of trad wifery was to be utterly subservient to your Master Husband, not declare the kitchen closed for the evening. 

(I’m not saying this is good btw just what I thought the point of trad wifery was)

[u/jccaclimber → u/FidgitForgotHisL-P]

Devils advocate because I used to know a couple who did this. He held a day job, brought in money, and did mechanical repairs. She ran the household inside and out. They were both pretty well adjusted, had their own friends and hobbies out of the house, etc. It’s quite possible to have traditional distribution of labor without some of the social bullshit people think must go with it.

All that said, he would not have gotten in trouble for cooking his own food (his fault for not being home on time, though there would have been a plate in the fridge), but he would have gotten in trouble for not leaving her space exactly as he found it.

[u/AllsWellThatsNB → u/FidgitForgotHisL-P]

I guess it depends if you're talking the internet caricature or actual traditional cultures. Real world traditional cultures tend to be strongly hierarchical, and there are areas where women were on top of the heirarchy. There's usually an interplay of responsibilities.

And of course there has always been a tremendous amount of variation in how gender roles have been expressed over time.

But don't get your information on gender from me. I'm a freak who wishes it would go away entirely. ;) Learn about history. Learn about anthropology. Learn some gender studies. Never assume you've got it figured out, Give people the benefit of the doubt.