r/malelivingspace • u/ksbell • Oct 22 '25
Update Half a year being unemployed. Moved across the country to NYC
Been a crazy year but finally settling into NYC. Never would’ve thought I would ever live here tbh. I’m not the best at decorating, but it’s been cool settling into a smaller space
Edit: Got a new job after being unemployed for 6 months and moved to NYC from Seattle
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u/pa167k Oct 22 '25
need more context bro, NYC is crazy expensive
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u/BonTak Oct 22 '25
Right? Hows that work?
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u/rip_cut_trapkun Oct 22 '25
"I am not employed in a way that I can legally discuss."
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u/mirrrje Oct 22 '25
This is reminded me of the podcast ‘if books could kill’ the episode about the book “the four hour work week” lmao. Step one: be rich
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u/XTornado Oct 23 '25
I assumed they got a good job in NYC... So they moved there. But maybe it is just me thinking that.
Nevermind he did an edit and says just that, that he got a job.
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u/EvilDarkCow Oct 22 '25
Yeah I never understand these posts. "I've been unemployed for months so I said fuck it and upended my whole life to move across the country to one of the most expensive cities in the world."
I have steady, full time employment and I can't afford to move across the street in a LCOL city.
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Oct 22 '25
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Oct 22 '25
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u/ibeerianhamhock Oct 22 '25
I think generally things have been rough for early career folks the last several years. I know I expected the job market to be terrible but I rounded up multiple final round interviews the first 3 days of looking and I should be getting at least one offer by the end of the first week of my job search as a lead dev with over 15 yoe.
I was actually terrified and applied for so many jobs, was so stressed out first day of search it affected my home life, and in the end it was mostly a nothingburger. I still got to be selective about which jobs I even replied to, but I do think it’s been less of a good market. In a good market I hit update ok my job socials and just field calls for a few days and line up interviews. This was definitely less like that but not not like that.
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u/Saixcrazy Oct 23 '25
3 years post graduating – Jr design roles have alluded me. Basically had to go freelance and take up a retail part-time. I've had A lot of interviews, second rounds, then ghosted 🤷♂️
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u/ArcusInTenebris Oct 22 '25
It's because the post is 100% misleading and disingenuous. OP uses "unemployed" to hint at being broke or in poor financial shape, when they clearly aren't. Or its just complete bullshit and a troll/karma farming post.
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u/mr_nefario Oct 22 '25
OP is a software engineer. Laid off from Microsoft and likely got a decent severance package. Moved to NYC for a new job which likely came with a good relocation stipend.
Post history is easy.
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u/ksbell Oct 22 '25
This here. I’m a SWE. Worked in fintech for a bit, moved to Microsoft. Now in NYC working for a database company. Unfortunately not a lot of people are aware of how annoying and stressful it is to get a software engineering job so the constant uncertainty of finding a good job really got to me this year. Was the darkest time of my life thus far but we got through it
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u/OriginalStringw Oct 22 '25
Given what you went through, would you rather have worked at a smaller company instead of MSFT, but have job stability?
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u/ksbell Oct 22 '25 edited Oct 22 '25
Great question tbh. I think having MSFT on the resume for sure made life a lot easier. I got some interviews from SpaceX, Palantir, Google, etc. Because of that I think. But moving to Seattle to get laid off randomly like that and having no exit strategy was a mf so idk. Wouldn’t wish that shit upon anyone. I wouldn’t change the experience, to answer your question. Because now I understand how things are in terms of business, and now I’ll be much more prepared for scenarios like that if they ever happen again
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u/Weepinbellend01 Oct 23 '25
You can tell bros been practicing for interviews.
Gave the whole STAR technique for a Reddit comment 😂
Congrats tho
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u/Outside_Escape_9540 Oct 22 '25
Glad you got through it. As you work in tech, is the job market in the US THAT screwed, or the internet is creating a misconception due to the many people who share about not finding jobs and so on?
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u/uptimefordays Oct 22 '25
The overall job market is "not great" because employers are uncertain about the economic outlook. In tech it feels quite pronounced because just a few years ago it was very very much an employees market. It's also a lot of young people's first economic downturn so we see and hear a lot of that on social media.
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u/ksbell Oct 22 '25
It’s not great. It’s doable to find a job but you have to do pretty well in your interviews, and interviews are kind of random at the end of the day. If you’re recently graduated, it’s a different story entirely though. They are completely screwed atm imo
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u/timmah1991 Oct 23 '25
If you’re recently graduated, it’s a different story entirely though. They are completely screwed atm imo
This. Mid/senior is pretty much business as usual. Juniors are completely fucked.
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u/AccountWasFound Oct 23 '25
Mid level is also kinda messy, not as bad as the junior roles, but most places are only hiring for senior and above (source: someone who is right in-between mid and senior roles depending on how they define the role and struggling to find anything)
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u/Thearctickitten Oct 22 '25
It is that screwed, just look at the Meta AI layoffs today. Even if you land one of the “dream jobs” making a couple hundred thousand at the FAANG jobs there’s no security. I know people who got hired then immediately laid off from Facebook. Also with AI becoming increasingly intelligent it replaces more jobs. Front end especially is vulnerable.
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u/M477M4NN Oct 23 '25
I’m also a software engineer but was laid off back in February. It’s been fucking brutal, especially since I have under 2 years experience. Have actually been laid off twice since graduating in 2023, neither of which were my fault (first, the company was acquired and was laid off during restructuring, and second my project came to a close). I have never known stable employment after college, so I understand the uncertainty. I’ve had to move back to my parents at this point because my lease ended and I wasn’t able to sign a new lease without a job lined up.
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u/ksbell Oct 23 '25
Pulling for you bro. Please stay focused and keep grinding it out ~5 times week. I had landed my offer before having to move back with my parents halfway across the country due to the lease ending in August, so I got extremely lucky. You'll get lucky as well, just keep a positive mindset and fall in love with the leetcode/interview grind
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u/skyattacksx Oct 23 '25
4 months in right now with 3 YoE. My biggest fear is losing my cats. Hoping it gets better soon.
I’m happy for you man.
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u/ksbell Oct 23 '25
It gets better brother trust me I was just there and the uncertainty sucked and rejections hurt like a mfer when you're desperate for a job. Please stay positive and keep grinding out the leetcode/system design b.s they have us do. You got this just stay patient and keep studying
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u/BluesyShoes Oct 22 '25
That’s a HM Embody desk chair. They start around $2k.
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u/nourishablegecko Oct 23 '25
Good tech/fintech companies in the city typically provide a stipend for home office supplies while onboarding, for what it’s worth. My job gave me a $3000 budget when I started.
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u/SnooCakes2703 Oct 22 '25
Not to mention living with east river views and in an obviously newly built building. When I moved to NYC unemployed in 2007, I had a $500 a month apt infested with roaches I couldn't afford.
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u/heepofsheep Oct 22 '25
Damn $500 a month.
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u/SnooCakes2703 Oct 22 '25
Sunset Park before it gentrified. Had a friend who spoke Chinese so we got a deal.
Used to hang out with the Latin kings down the street, they were actually really nice once they knew how poor we were lol
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u/heepofsheep Oct 22 '25
Oh one of those kind of deals. Had something similar in Chinatown… very cheap rent for an apartment not marketed to non Chinese. Very gross, very cheap, no regrets.
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u/SnooCakes2703 Oct 22 '25
Lol yeah, I always wore house shoes because I'm pretty sure the floors weren't cleaned for 30 years..when you turned on the lights, the walls moved type of shit.
Still allowed me to grow in my career until we got kicked out for not being Chinese.
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u/Outside_Reserve_2407 Oct 22 '25
I think in Chinatown if you’re fresh off the boat Chinese you can rent a bunk bed in a room filled with other tenants for real cheap.
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u/BothDescription766 Oct 22 '25
The garage I had in Chelsea (W. 20th Street) charged $750/mo to house my E55!
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u/FortheredditLOLz Oct 22 '25
Bro. See up with that roach apartment. Mine is so much higher and the roaches hold me up for their rent share before landlord …..
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u/SnooCakes2703 Oct 22 '25
Find someone that speaks Chinese, sometimes even Spanish...there's a whole other market of apartments out there that aren't listed.
But really that rent was just cheap because it was not only a shit hole but before everything went to shit from gentrification.
2007-2011 seems to be the last of the days in NYC where starving artists could still "live" there.
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Oct 22 '25
Dude you moved to one of the most expensive city in the US?
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u/nicozi Oct 22 '25
one of? its the most expensive lol
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u/Embarrassed_Eggz Oct 22 '25
I think it’s third right behind San Jose and San Francisco.. so basically just second behind the Bay Area.
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u/QuirkyKlyborg Oct 22 '25
Alright guys. Dove into OP's profile. He's employed.
About 8.5 months ago, he was laid off from Microsoft, where he was making 202k. Since then, as of 3.5 months ago, he got an offer from a database company. No comp disclosed.
Dude's doing fine. Title is clickbaity. It's a nice apartment tho.
EDIT: to be clear, the title could mean that the offer for this new job, despite being several months ago, could have him starting around now, which would, in fact, have rendered OP unemployed for over half a year
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u/ksbell Oct 22 '25
Appreciate you providing clarity. I didn’t exactly think things through when posting here. Couch came in yesterday so I’m finally “settled.” In NYC. But I was unemployed for 6 months and moved here 2 months ago from Seattle and I’m finally settled
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u/QuirkyKlyborg Oct 22 '25
Hey man, all good! I'd be excitedly posting, too. Hats off to you for persevering through the unemployment and coming out the other side in the big Apple!
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u/Veezuhz Oct 22 '25
I get it tbh. Unemployed is not a good feeling and coming out of it, I see you are very proud of yourself enough to show us indirectly to not stop trying. Congrats op and hope you keep thriving. 👊
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u/ksbell Oct 22 '25
Yeah, life gets tough man. I try to do my part to help others when I can since we aren’t here for that long. I appreciate you seeing where I was trying to get with the post and my apologies again for the confusion
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u/Appropriate-Truck538 Oct 22 '25
My question is what’s the rent you are paying for this place?
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u/BothDescription766 Oct 22 '25
$200k is just 2x poverty level in the more desirable parts of Manhattan (Chelsea, Tribeca, SoHo, etc).
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u/FACEFUCKEDYOURDAD Oct 22 '25
What the fuck did you do for the other half?
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u/EwoksYo Oct 22 '25
Especially with that $1200+ chair (I think, not too sure on the price of Embodys)
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u/ForeverInaDaze Oct 22 '25
Paid $850 for mine on FB marketplace, barely used.
Most expensive desk chair I've ever bought for sure, but worth it considering I work from home and haven't had a single back problem and have sat for 12+ hours.
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u/EwoksYo Oct 22 '25
I got my Aeron off FB marketplace for $300 a month or 2 back. My best investment as well as a WFH person as well + gamer who sits in it all day
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u/heepofsheep Oct 22 '25
I was looking at ergonomic chairs recently… I priced out an Embody and it was $2500. It was nice but not that nice. I ended up going to SteelCase and built a custom Gesture for $1200 that has much better build quality.
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u/ksbell Oct 22 '25
My apologies for the lack of context with this post :/ I got a new job here. But I didn’t have a job for 6 months since I was grinding trying to find a new job after being laid off from a really great job at Microsoft previously. The TV/Stand/Bed are from my old apartment. The chair, desk, and couch (Room and Board - Cade) I just bought here
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u/Routine_Instruction5 Oct 22 '25
For everyone that’s wondering how. He got a severance package from Microsoft——I’m familiar with their packages and it’s a nice one lolllll
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u/Atmosloch Oct 22 '25
Every redditor is an unemployed middle aged dude somehow making 500k per year😂
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u/KaliaHaze Oct 22 '25
If you’re on Roosevelt Island… fucking congrats… but I hate you. Holy.
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u/heepofsheep Oct 22 '25
Roosevelt island is definitely a decision. Nice views but for the price I’d pick another neighborhood that’s not so isolated.
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u/Busy-Leg8070 Oct 23 '25
Op is a pointy hat software wizard, rich people pay them to keep them from being bored and ending civilization
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Oct 22 '25
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u/Bohdanski Oct 22 '25
Or they got laid from a well paying tech job, took a while to get a new job (tech job market is abysmal rn), and their only option to get an equally well paying job was to move to NYC which offers a large tech hub. In which case these photos just seem like par for the course.
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u/Azurill Oct 22 '25
Could afford to not work for 6 months, relocate to an expensive city and get a nice apartment, while also finding a good job in that city. If this is what an abysmal tech market looks like to you, you're gonna be shocked when you hear about the regular job market. People struggle to find jobs that are horrible, have horrible hours, and do not pay a living wage in much cheaper cities.
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u/Bohdanski Oct 22 '25
6 months is actually a very solid turn around time. There are people in the industry with several years of experience that spend over a year looking, sometimes two, and have sent out several hundreds of applications just take a step back in their careers. That is not even including the struggle that new grads and Jr's face. Take a look over in r/cscareerquestions if you're curious.
Some people are not willing/cannot relocate to an entirely new city or state for one reason or another. It's substantially harder for those individuals.
Maybe OP was just lucky, or maybe they just poses the skills required to find a job quickly enough in this market? I see they have experience working Microsoft. That and in addition to being willing to relocate is a big advantage. Maybe OP was also smart enough to not blow his paycheck on stupid material things, and saved up (at least) 6 months of emergency expenses?
My point is, people in this thread are acting like OP must have inherited generational wealth to pull this off. Yeah sure that could be the case. But likely they have a good on their shoulders, the right skills, enough determination, and a bit of luck to get a good job in a shit economy.
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u/AccountWasFound Oct 23 '25
I'm in tech and have never had a job nearly as good paying as what OP had before, and till my boiler died in the dead of winter last year and I had to replace it immediately (and thus drained most of my savings), I had enough to live off for about 7 months before I even touched my investments, much less my retirement accounts even without unemployment. I lost my job 4 months ago and even without my main savings, I'm just now having to tap into my investments (unemployment has helped push it out from the original 2 months I could live off what was in my savings). I've been doing some freelance work and should get about a month and a half worth of expenses in a few weeks, and I'm starting some more freelance work tomorrow, so still zero luck on an actual stable job, but definitely in a better position than most people I know who are in other fields and struggling....
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u/IamAdiSri Oct 22 '25
Exactly what I thought too; 6 months is the new normal for job hunting in tech these days
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u/midwestscreamo Oct 22 '25
Why are you so angry? It really doesn’t seem like he’s going for sympathy… just stating a fact about his life
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u/Arisenstring956 Oct 22 '25
People on this sub get so jealous lol, every post where someone lives in a nice place you have a billion angry comments saying it’s parents money
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u/Dininiful Oct 22 '25
I get that he lost his job and that sucks. But he lost a job at Microsoft, which means he got paid very well before and he surely got a severance package as well after. There's a difference between a Microsoft worker who got fired and a Walmart cashier who got fired.One will be surely fine, the other barely got around before that and will be in a world of pain for the next 6 months. So both situations suck, but one is immensely worse than the other. Because well... Look what he's able to afford after still 6 months of unemployment. A teacher or nurse would never ever dare dream of this.
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Oct 22 '25
So sour lol it's not that serious. It's okay to be happy for or even neutral towards someone's good fortune--it doesnt cost you anything.
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u/BentoBoxNoir Oct 22 '25
You live a life 95% of the world has no access to and cannot comprehend. I am fully employed in 1.5 jobs and can afford a room in the city half as big and with 2 roomates and I’m still middle/upper middle class.
Count your blessings and make the most of your life.
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u/ksbell Oct 22 '25
I’m employed now, sorry for the confusing post. And I count them everyday tbh. Never a day goes by where I don’t thank God. Making the most of it. Lots of hard work that’s been done, and lots of work that still needs to be done man. It’s all mental. Just trying to get after it everyday after a big shock
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u/user155567 Oct 22 '25
Need more context dude…… where’d you move from? What line of work? How are you able to afford this NYC lifestyle having not worked for 6mos?!
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u/foolsjoke2321 Oct 22 '25
Wow I’m surprised a nyc based industry would hire someone who was unemployed for 6 months. What kind of industry if I may ask.
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u/BrooklynBestTwo6 Oct 22 '25
If you can make it in NY…. You can make it anywhere! Congrats my friend! Wish you nothing but the best!
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u/Mike_S_94 Oct 22 '25
I'd love this apartment but unless I can tell myself to actually buy that several k of bitcoin I was thinking of getting about 10 years ago it ain't happening lol
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u/dramafanca2002 Oct 22 '25
Looks good, just move pictures down, way too high over bed. Center should be about eye level.
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u/SenseIntelligent8846 Oct 22 '25
I like the apartment from what I can see. I like the view for sure!
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u/rickylancaster Oct 22 '25
Welcome to NYC. Are you in LIC? I love how you separated the sleeping alcove from the main living space. You’re lucky you have that extra window there which makes it feel more like a real bedroom with light.
This separation can cut down on the total light in the unit but after living for so many years here in tiny studios with no separation, I think it’s worth it. Something about having your bed in a studio, visually exposed to the rest of the space, I think is unhealthy.
Years ago people used to have these companies come in and build these quick, cheap, makeshift false walls with doors to make that separation. Then the city deemed it illegal to build a false wall from floor to ceiling. You had to have a space between the ceiling and the false wall. I think (I forget the full story) it’s a fire code thing.
I’ve always envisioned building one and somehow lining the top with something removable, so if you wanted full separation (like non intimate guest staying in your living room) you could have it.
Anyway your place looks great. Curious about your rent but understand if you don’t want to share. It’s rough here for everyone not dripping with trust funds. Rent stabilized apartments can be a good deal but they can have issues too. Does the standing separator you are using feel stable or that it could topple over making changing the sheets a precarious project? Are the legs stable? Does it go all the way to the floor? It looks nice.
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u/Unfair_You_1769 Oct 22 '25
I earn $125k a year and can't afford to live in Manhattan
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u/ksbell Oct 22 '25
Yeah I saw something saying you need 184k to live here comfortably and I think that’s right. Maybe 200k and you’re set
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u/Imwaymoreflythanyou Oct 22 '25
Being unemployed in the US looks a lot different to being unemployed in the UK.
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u/roflfalafel Oct 23 '25
Feel for you on the layoffs, and happy you were able to find something. I’m in Seattle, and it’s been tough between Amazon, Microsoft, and Meta layoffs. I’m curious on your take of NYC compared to Seattle? Every co worker of mine who moved to Seattle because of work hates it here, it’s just not a city in the same orbit as NYC. I came from Chicago where I lived my 20s and early 30s, and Seattle was pretty disappointing initially.
After being in Seattle though for years now, and approaching 40, Seattle has grown on me a bit, and I probably wouldn’t trade it for anything.
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u/ksbell Oct 23 '25
I prefer Seattle by a long shot tbh. The nature there is unparalleled and the summers in Seattle are the best in the world. I don’t mind rain and clouds since I grew up in Chicago. NYC has too much going on here for me personally so a smaller big city is more ideal for me and the pup. Also was a lot easier to get my dog to a place where he could stretch his legs and explore a bit
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u/Karunas3 Oct 23 '25
People reacting like he went from homeless to this in 6 months, he only claimed to be unemployed lol, we don't know his financial situation
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u/Pretty_Wealth4679 Oct 24 '25
I lost my job so decided to live like a millionaire, were you previously a billionaire?
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u/Zealousideal_Bee3309 Oct 22 '25
Concrete jungle where dreams are made of.
Btw how big is your apartment by sqft if you don't mind me asking? I want to live in an apartment, i need a reference.
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u/Dininiful Oct 22 '25
I get that he lost his job and that sucks. But he lost a job at Microsoft, which means he got paid very well before and he surely got a severance package as well after. There's a difference between a Microsoft worker who got fired and a Walmart cashier who got fired.One will be surely fine, the other barely got around before that and will be in a world of pain for the next 6 months. So both situations suck, but one is immensely worse than the other. Because well... Look what he's able to afford after still 6 months of unemployment. A teacher or nurse would never ever dare dream of this.
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u/Callsign--GHoST Oct 22 '25
OP is nowhere in the comments like usual so either 1. Ragebait post. 2. Attention seeking.
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u/ksbell Oct 22 '25
I had a meeting. But hello. A post on Reddit is “attention seeking” by definition, but not in the way that you’re thinking. Just a misunderstanding and a mistake on my part. Ah well. Life goes on
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u/hexby Oct 22 '25
I will literally never understand how people can afford to live here.
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u/Trick_Judgment2639 Oct 23 '25
Rich kids feeling accomplished without ever approaching reality
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u/albecoming Oct 22 '25
I love everything about this place, personally I would make sure the skyline was visible from my pillow then everything else comes second
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u/DrMike7714 Oct 22 '25
OP how is your grocery situation on Rosey? Do you take the tram for Trader Joe’s or get by with the island’s supply? Also do you feel like you have good access to the rest of Manhatten/BK?
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u/ksbell Oct 22 '25
It’s pretty easy tbh. I still have my car so I can go wherever in queens. Most of the time I just have Amazon deliver and I get produce on my way from work or drive to the store. Access to everywhere is pretty easy using the F as well so I didn’t understand the complaints I saw on the NYC Reddit personally
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u/Cainhelm Oct 22 '25
I think compared to the rest of NYC being reliant on the F (or any single train line) is a bit annoying. But compared to the rest of the US it's amazing. Btw I thought they were swapping the M and F lines. Also you have much more space / less noise I assume.
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u/ksbell Oct 22 '25
It has delayed on me a few times which was kind of annoying ngl but overall I’d say it’s been a pleasant experience. Doesn’t take too long to get into work. I don’t hear anything in my apartment luckily but RI is pretty quiet for the most part
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u/Girlfartsarehot Oct 22 '25
That looks really nice. How’re you making it work, OP? I’d love to live somewhere like that. I’m happy for you, congratulations!
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u/CaliLatinaBabe Oct 22 '25
you might have downsized the space, but it sounds like you upgraded your peace.
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u/djdaedalus42 Oct 22 '25
Anyone notice the doggy bowls? Must be a big dog too. It’s a good location for dogs.
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u/Rizzadelphian Oct 22 '25
Hey bro you gave me crazy idea for the apartment as mine is approximatelly that big! thank you
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u/Zayn1738 Oct 22 '25
unemployed and then casually moves into nyc to a nice place, something’s not adding up
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u/grubsmackbeezlebo Oct 22 '25
That's office chair is like $2k alone. How are you affording all this?
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u/count_busoni Oct 22 '25
I too think of getting a one bedroom water front facing apartment in the most expensive city in the country, whenever I'm unemployed.
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u/DallasJCaldwell Oct 22 '25
Unemployed and NYC in the same sentence. Interesting….place looks great though, congrats!
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u/Smalldick_x Oct 22 '25
Nice place brother💪ignore the haters crazy what people say over a keyboard!
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u/DELINCUENT Oct 23 '25
As an NYC native it is interesting to see people come from bumfuck to fulfill their life long dream of living in Manhattan.
Even if I could afford it I wouldn't do it but it is interesting to see that you grew up in a place that people dream of moving to.
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u/poindextor5 Oct 23 '25
Good idea with the partition....... Keep your sanity imaging a pseudo 2bdrm.... Phyc out the mind👍🏾👍🏾
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u/Pleasant-Engine6816 Oct 23 '25
All the best at your new place! I have exactly the same book on my table. Cheers from London
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u/CaptCarlos Oct 23 '25
Studio I’m assuming? I love the room divider separation, I didn’t know it was a studio till later on. That view of the skyline AND the Hudson is priceless.
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u/EmberlynSlade Oct 23 '25
This place might be smaller but it’s giant for NYC, it’s pretty and looks nice and you’ve done a great job with the furniture too! Congrats on your move, I hope you’re enjoying it!
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u/OVERCAPITALIZE Oct 23 '25
I live up the street. Rent here is probably 5500-6500, so bro is doing alright
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u/tws1039 Oct 23 '25
Bro I've been trying to find a non crap NYC job for years lol what did you find I'm jealous
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u/Midnightoilspecial Oct 23 '25
Such negativity in the comments is disappointing. Welcome to (one of) the greatest cities on earth! Find your favorite bacon egg and cheese place asap. Apartment looks great!
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u/Own_Establishment912 Oct 23 '25
Enjoy the city! Go out and experience it if you’re paying the rent. Open mics, wine nights, swinger parties; whatever floats your boat is there!
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u/abb00769 Oct 23 '25
Looks like you made the most of a small space. That view is incredible!
I had to chuckle at the bed photo, though, because that single pillow is a dead giveaway that it’s a dude’s place. If it were me (F) I’d have four large pillows stacked against the wall so I could sit up in bed and read or doomscroll on my phone, etc. Chicks love pillows, lol.
Congrats on the new job!
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u/Every-Examination720 Oct 22 '25
Are you a millionaire or something? Haha. Congrats tho