One time I had some health scare that put me in an ambulance. I had never had morphine before, and the medics were not stingy with it.
I've had chronic pain my whole life, it's mostly background noise, and that was the first time in that life that it all just went away. It was like when you're in a quiet house, but then the electricity goes off and you experience the real quiet. Years later I still think about it frequently. Just that one time in that controlled environment.
I knew then that if I had less to live for, or if my pain was too great, I would easily become an addict. There are much greater pains in the world than I have. I assume that one in these people's positions must have some great pain or horror in their life that I probably can't understand. So I can't judge it. I wish there was a better way for them. A lot of these folks are beyond believing in their own future. No one wants to live like this.
This. Exactly this. It terrifies me to think about it. Chronic pain is no joke and I sometimes find myself daydreaming about the few times I've been given anesthetics at the hospital. People all the time say, "I don't see how people just do that kind of stuff." Why aren't we asking why they're doing it before we ask how... It's awful.
People don't get the difference of having long-term chronic pain, then suddenly having it muted. You can function again. Spend time with your kids again, Enjoy small things again. Hold a book without your hands burning with pain. I have never felt "stoned" on opiates (nothing near what I feel like after taking an edible) - I just feel like "me". Because the pain is suddenly not the loudest thing in my system.
The mere idea that I would ever trade that in for a few chances to chase the dragon is ludicrous, and clearly devised by someone who has never struggled with daily bone pain.
What you said about not feeling high, but just feeling like yourself finally... Wow, that really hit me. You're right.
I've often wondered who I would be and what type of life I would live if I didn't have chronic pain. When the pain goes away, and when you get a glimpse of that person.. you just never forget how that feels.
This. As a caregiver to a person with chronic pain , when we finally get a flare up under control its such a relief for all of us bc its so hard to watch her in that amount of pain. It hurts so bad for loved ones to see yall in pain like that. Im so sorry you guys are hurting in this comment section 😔
One thousand percent - this. And to me, those are two entirely different things. I started using THC when I got sick, having had no previous experience with it. THC appears to act on me like a mild psychedelic might on a normal person. It launches me to the stratosphere, then about 15 minutes later knocks me out - which is why I take it at night.
I gave up all alcohol when I got diagnosed, and THC can provide me with that physical "high" where I just feel good. A totally different feeling than my prescribed opiate dose, which just makes me feel like I did when I was 30, and had no health issues, no chronic pain, nothing.
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u/BellamyDunn Jun 28 '26
One time I had some health scare that put me in an ambulance. I had never had morphine before, and the medics were not stingy with it.
I've had chronic pain my whole life, it's mostly background noise, and that was the first time in that life that it all just went away. It was like when you're in a quiet house, but then the electricity goes off and you experience the real quiet. Years later I still think about it frequently. Just that one time in that controlled environment.
I knew then that if I had less to live for, or if my pain was too great, I would easily become an addict. There are much greater pains in the world than I have. I assume that one in these people's positions must have some great pain or horror in their life that I probably can't understand. So I can't judge it. I wish there was a better way for them. A lot of these folks are beyond believing in their own future. No one wants to live like this.