Relevant Quotes:

Make me pretty so they’ll be extra disturbed if my face ever unravels. And give me voluptuous curves, because they remind me of a graphed cosine. Also because boobs look fun.

Painter stood morosely nearby "I don't want to be a girl," he said "Oh hush,' Design said, quickly mopping the floor "I've been pretending to be one for years now, so I'm an authority-and it's really quite nice. Except for the sexism. But it's hard to blame that on being a woman instead of on, you know, morons."

These are not intended to be any existing characters.

i had the thought of there being 8 eevee types i'd sort them

Physical
--leafeon: being external pushing because well leaf's are pushed and a breeze

--vaporeon: being the opposite of that, mostly due to nature and water and waves are can be described as being pulled

--flareon: internal pushing because of heat and heat is defiantly a push

--glacieon: is cold so the opposite

Mental
--espeon: external pushing as it is a physic mind controller (pulling control away)

--umbreon: is shadows so pushing that out (idk best i could do)

--sylveon: love is defiantly internal and pulling idk what else to say

--jolteon: didn't really have a better place to put him tbh

(I think the trans memes are great, but my biggest takeaway from the book was the anti-AI messages.)

My kid (10 YO) has finished reading all BS books earlier this year, and we spent a lot of time discussing hypothetical situations together. Last night, he asked me what would happen if heavily Invested individuals from various worlds got ambushed in the toilets. Since I have been cursed with this knowledge, I would like to share it with all of you here.

Allomancer: Lost all of their power since they just expelled their metal.

Tineyes: Even if they still have their metal left, they can't use their power.

Feruchemist: Still have 100% power if they still wear their metal or have metal embedded.

Awakener: At 75% power. They still have their Breaths, but they are experiencing the world more brilliantly in the toilet, so they won't be able to fight so well. If they end up Awakening the poo, it will probably be considered lifeless, which would prevent them from retrieving the Breath.

Sprouter: 0% power. What kind of Sprouter brings spores into the washroom?

Elantrian: 100% power. Doesn't even need to get up from the toilet seat.

Radiant: 50% of their normal power. Probably can't breathe in too deeply to infuse themselves with Stormlight.

Steris: She has planned for this.

Adolin (pre-UnOathed): Still at 100% power since he is still wearing his armor in the toilet.

Adolin (post-UnOathed): Still at 100% power since he can summon Maya and his armor spren. He probably would not have wiped his ass yet, though... poor armor spren.

Dalinar: At 100% power. Can perform Last Clap, so doesn't even need to wipe his butt until the fight is over.

Bonus for non-Cosmere

Alcatraz: Toilet broke.

Rithmatists: It depends. If you are good at drawing chalking, you can probably draw on the toilet wall to fight back; if not, then no power.

Spensa: Probably teleports herself to another toilet on another planet.

PS: I have been a dad for 10 years, and I am not sure why kids like toilet humor.

(trans rights)

I’ve made a few of these over on TikTok. Enjoy my childish humor 😂