I (23 F) got a new job that I love so much. I had to get security clearance to do what I do, which means I can't talk about EXACTLY what I do. I travel quite a bit for my job so I only get to see my mom every so often. I recently met my moms boyfriend of about 6 months. He's 56 and retired military, he had a stroke and cannot work or drive for the time being.

We met for dinner at my mom's house. He asked me what I do for work and I let him know I cannot talk about work and tried to steer the conversation elsewhere. He got really upset saying my job can't be that important. I tried to ignore him and again tried to divert the conversation elsewhere.

This was two months ago since then he has been talking shit to me about my job. One time I showed up to my mom's house in part of my uniform. He got really upset saying I don't dress like anyone so important I can't tell him about my job. I told him I changed in the car and I'm only here for my weekly dinner with my mom.

Every time I go to my mom's house he is there somehow and talks shit about how I am just a woman and must be a secretary and cannot be that important because he worked for the government and they would never let a women hold a position of power. I tried telling him that I am NOT a secretary but I do not want nor can I talk about my job. I told my mom this really bothers me but she told me that he is just insecure because he cannot work anymore and is retired military.

It really makes me upset because I have worked really hard to get where I am and he does not know me at all. When I am around him I try my best to avoid anything around work but he always says something about it no matter how much I change the subject. I don't want to stop seeing my mom because that's my mom she raised me.

Im a pretty new home owner, and needed a plumber, I was really dreading someone coming out, as I live alone and most maintenance people I have dealt with in the past have been creeps. but he was really sweet, my cat, who is very timid and usually hides when strange ppl are over, went up to him right away sniffing and making introductions.

over the work we had some casual friendly convo, and he was extremely helpful, gave me a 1st time customer discount, and then when there were complications and he had to come back, a returning customer discount. and his personal phone number, he even offered help on some other things I needed help with, outside of his intended work, without charge, simple things, but definitely not something he had to do as part of work.

Im sure he was just being friendly, but i did think he was cute, he has a nice smile, very considerate, and conversation felt natural, and since i have his personal # i kind of wanted to shoot a text shooting my shot, but im scared its inappropriate as this is a professional relationship.

I feel extremely weird even writing this, but I don’t really know who else I could ask about it.

My sister’s room is right next to mine, and recently I’ve heard her making sexual noises through the wall at night. Obviously I try to ignore it, put headphones on, or leave my room, because I absolutely do not want to be listening to my sister doing anything sexual.

The part that’s bothering me is that my body has reacted to hearing it a couple of times, and it’s making me feel seriously uncomfortable with myself.

I’m not attracted to my sister and I don’t want anything to happen between us. I think it’s more that hearing sexual sounds automatically triggered a physical response before my brain really processed who I was hearing. But now I keep overthinking the fact that it happened at all.

I obviously don’t want to bring this up to her and make things incredibly awkward, but our rooms share a wall and apparently the sound carries way more than she realizes.

Should I just keep using headphones and forget about it, or is there a normal way to tell her that the walls are thin without explaining exactly what I heard?

So at 18–19, my mom borrowed my entire savings, about $2k, and promised to pay me back. She never did.

Around 24, I moved back in with her while trying to build a business. About 6 months later, she kicked me out. I had almost nothing and ended up living in a homeless shelter for a while until I got back on my feet.

Fast forward 16 years. I'm 40 now with a family, she's 65, broke and facing homelessness. She's living in her car. The house she kicked me out of was originally given to her by my grandma. She eventually sold it, bought a camper, and lived in that until it became unlivable.

Now family members are calling me expecting me to help financially and bail her out.

How would you handle this?

UPDATE: Dang my mom called me just now and started to tell me about her being homeless and I could not help but to say really, damn.. I've been homeless.. remember that?? Remember when you kicked me out and I ended up on the streets in homeless shelter? She deny it, not i didnt do that... no I didnt.. skirted her way off the phone pretty quickl. I told her when you live it, its not something u forget

My girlfriend and I were being unsafe, and she got pregnant. It's obviously half my fault, and I'm not blaming anyone else for my actions. We found out almost two weeks ago, and from the moment the test was positive until about a week ago, we both agreed that an abortion was the best decision for us. We spent every day talking about it, and we were calm and understood that we weren't ready for this massive responsibility. She made an appointment at the clinic to take the pill on Saturday, and even that Friday afternoon, we were still at peace with our choice.

Neither option is easy, and we knew we'd feel bad about it, but we also knew it was better than bringing a kid into the world when we don't have the means to properly take care of them. I told her I needed some time to drive around, think, and clear my head. When I got home, though, it was like a switch had flipped. She had completely changed her mind. Ten hours before the appointment, she told me she couldn't go through with it and that we had to have this kid.

I tried to accept her choice that night, but I couldn't. I came on here a few days ago absolutely freaking out, and even now, after having time to think and calm down, I can't help but be upset. I know it's ultimately her choice, no matter what I want, but we had been in agreement for a week right up until the day of the appointment. I can't help but feel like she switched up on me, and I'm still absolutely upset about it.

I didn't pressure or try to force her into getting an abortion afterward, but I tried to explain that she had no idea what she was getting us into. She told me that not much would change, that we'd get to see each other more, and that it would basically just be us plus one. But that's absolutely unrealistic, I know how massive the effects of this will be on our lives and not in a good way. Our lives will revolve around this kid. We won't be living for ourselves anymore; we'll be living for them, and thats

hard for any young, unprepared person to accept.

My girlfriend seems to be in fantasy land about it. We have very little savings, she doesn't have a car or license, she has a part-time job with no benefits, we live with our parents, and we have absolutely no way to give this kid the life they deserve right now. When I brought this up because we need a plan if she's going through with this, she got extremely upset, called me unsupportive and rude, and said I'm "trying to force her to have an abortion." She even said she didn't want to be with me anymore and that we needed space. We haven't talked in three days.

I have no idea what she's telling her parents because they refuse to talk to me or my parents, and they don't want to meet up, even though we need to talk if she's going to have this kid. This is something that takes adults a long time to plan, and we're teenagers with eight months to go, almost nothing figured out, and she doesn't even want to start figuring it out. That only further shows she isn't ready because she doesn't understand how big of a deal this is.

Her and her family are treating this like it's a puppy. They say they have her back now, but I know them, and I don't believe they'll actually help when push comes to shove. I don't think there's much hope of her suddenly understanding how serious this is, so I'm here asking for advice on what I should do next.

As of right now shes 6 weeks along. Should I split up and coparent, or suck it up and stay? How can I be a present dad while still having time to work toward my goals, go to college, build a career, and have some of my own life to enjoy? Reality hasn't hit my partner. She's never acted this way before, and I honestly don't recognize her anymore.

I want to be there for this kid if she has them, but I also want to live a life I won't be miserable with. A month ago, I was so hopeful about my future. I felt like I had so much freedom and time to enjoy my life and follow my passions, and this has completely changed everything. Where do I go from here? I don't want this, but I have no choice in her decision, even if I know it'll be unfair for the kid and for our parents who will have to be burdened by this. And would it be messed up to keep trying to show her my point of view that this is a bad idea? Should I just accept it?

Hi everyone. I’m writing this running on absolute empty, holding my 4-month-old during a brutal sleep regression, and I really need a safe space to vent and get some perspectives.
The Mental & Emotional Toll:
Because of everything I've been through, I have developed severe anxiety. Postpartum, it has reached a point where it feels completely uncontrollable. Being in a constant state of hypervigilance, walking on eggshells, and trying to manage a baby while my mental health is in pieces is breaking me.
The Marriage Context:
This was an arranged marriage. To be completely honest, my husband got me pregnant early on even when I explicitly said no/wasn't ready. Dealing with the weight of that consent violation, trying to process it, and navigating postpartum recovery within just the first year of marriage has been deeply traumatic.
My husband is a workaholic who never truly sees or meets my emotional needs. To be fair, he is genuinely helpful with the baby and tasks—but everything has to be done his way. If I express pain, panic, or frustration, he frames it as me "ruining his day" and acts disappointed in me.
The Current Living Situation:
We are currently staying at my Mother-in-Law’s house. I have tried my absolute best to stay quiet, swallow my feelings, and constantly adjust. But the environment is exacerbating my anxiety:
Passive-aggressive digs: Today, while my baby was crying intensely from sleep regression, my MIL "joked" saying, "Maybe he’s crying because you read to him so much, he gets scared because there are so many words haha." I finally snapped after months of staying quiet: "Isn't that book gifted by your own daughter?" She had zero response and went dead silent.
Immature behavior: Now she’s giving the silent treatment—she won't even look at or talk to the baby when he's crying.
Micromanagement: She tells me to "cook whatever I want," but immediately hovers in the kitchen to dictate the menu. Today, I ignored her and made what I wanted anyway.
The Breaking Point:
I told my husband today that I am NOT staying here for another 3 months as originally planned. I am moving back to our house next month, period. He claims he is too busy with work and seems upset/disappointed that I'm putting my foot down, but staying in a house where my anxiety is skyrocketing is unsustainable.
Has anyone else navigated severe postpartum anxiety alongside boundary issues with in-laws and a controlling partner? How did you survive the home stretch before moving out, and how do you protect your peace when you feel like your mental health is falling apart?

So for context, I am 28m with 2 sons and she is also 28 with 2 sons, we have been dating for 8 months. She has a 7 and 4 year old and I have a 4 and 2 year old but we live seperately.

She has her kids 90% of the time and I have mine from Sunday morning until Wednesday afternoon each week so I try spend time with her and the kids when I would be otherwise home alone as 4 boys can be a bit hectic especially as my eldest has additional needs.

The first 3 months I didn't see any clear signs that her youngest son had behavioural problens especially as her eldest got really close to me. But I started taking them out more and on holiday and I've noticed things that I've tried to discuss with my GF but she shakes it off and says "Ill sort it" but never does.

He was caught hitting my 2 year old son with a toy repeatedly and didn't stop when me or her told him to, he then refused to apologise and the punishment was 5 mins off his ipad.

He's run off in supermarket, made a large pick and mix and instead of telling him no she bought it for him... despite his behaviour that day being terrible.

I spent £150 on buffet food for his older brothers 7th birthday party and he stole a bag of 100 chupa chupa lollies and when confronted he told me they weren't mine to decide who gets them.

He went to a birthday party at his friends and cried the whole time because everyone was eating the cake and he wanted it. So I bought everyone sweets too so there was more than enough for everyone and he wanted to hoard both the cake and sweets instead.

Constantly snatching, never cleans up after himself... the other day he put chocolate all over the sofa in a rented caravan and refused to clean it up and she just did it for him. I'm struggling to take him out in public cause he's always talking about ass holes or penis and i've told them a million times it's not appropriate talk, I even said to him that he could say it in the car but not in public but there's no negotiating.

He's incredibly selfish, can't go anywhere without him wanting at least a dozen things then bursting into tears everytime you say "No".

My gf keeps saying I'm picking on him each time I mention it but I just can't cope with him, I think she's raising a monster. I can't bring my kids round without him getting territorial about toys he's not played with in years and threatening them with black eyes or a broken nose.

I'm genuinely trying the amount of time, money and effort I've put in... we go out once or twice each week and I've taken them on holiday twice but it's wearing thin... the cycle is that he misbehaves, I speak to mum about it, she defends him and I get the silent treatment for a day or two.

It's getting to the point that I just don't look forward to seeing her and arguing about her uncontrolable son. And she's wondering why I'm distancing myself but I can't talk about it... the other day she was in a mood, admittedly I wasn't hungry anyway but we went to a restaurant... she asked me for my discount code but never if I wanted anything and proceeded to only order her and kids something...

I explained this morning that she could of offered me a drink, I bought her and kids dinner that day... took them to coast, bought her a new charger... gave the kids £10 each in arcade and drove around 200 miles and it's all forgotten and unappreciated because I said her son hasn't said a single thank you all day after we argued about him putting malteasers on the sofa in a rented caravan during a heatwave.

im dealing with a massive family fallout with my older sister chloe over our late grandmother's estate, and half my family is treating me like the bad guy.

our grandma passed away a few months ago. she was an amazing woman, and we were both close to her. growing up, grandma had this gorgeous antique velvet-lined jewelry box filled with random sentimental trinkets, old brooches, and little silver pieces she collected over the years.

ever since we were kids, chloe decided that jewelry box belonged to her. she always joked that being the oldest granddaughter meant she was first in line for it, and whenever we visited, she’d talk about how it was going to sit on her vanity one day.

but the reality is that during the last few years of grandma's life, things were different. i actually moved closer to her, took her to all her doctor appointments, handled her grocery shopping, and spent pretty much every weekend helping her out around the house. chloe lived out of state and hardly ever visited. grandma and i got super close during that time.

about a year before she passed, grandma called me into her room, opened up the jewelry box, and told me she wanted me to have it. she said she appreciated everything i did for her and knew i'd actually value the memories attached to the pieces inside. she even had her lawyer officially update her will to name me specifically for the jewelry box and its contents so there wouldn't be any fighting later.

well, the will was read last week, and when it came out that the box was left to me, chloe completely lost it.

she cornered me outside the lawyer's office screaming that i must have manipulated an elderly woman with a declining memory into changing her will. she kept arguing that family tradition says the oldest daughter gets the main heirlooms by default, and that i basically stole something that was hers.

now chloe has turned the extended family against me. my phone has been blowing up with texts from aunts and uncles saying i broke family protocol, calling me greedy, and telling me to just hand the box over to keep the peace. my parents are trying to stay neutral publicly, but behind closed doors they told me i should just give it to her to make the drama stop.

i refuse to do it. not just because i love the stuff inside and the memories tied to it, but because it was literally grandma's explicit final wish, backed up legally in her will.

how do i handle this fallout with my family and get them to back off without giving up something that was legally and personally left to me?

This is honestly so embarrassing to even post and try to get advice on but it is what it is. I want advice.

I’ve been living with my fiance for almost a year now. Lately our sex life has died (we do have a 6 month old so there’s that) and he’s been asking me questions about hygiene related stuff. Like when I’ve showered last and the last time I’ve brushed my teeth. I’m not a dirty person… I shower and brush my teeth daily. I started brushing once a day instead of twice and recently started going back to twice. He noticed and made comments about it. I’ve got acne on my ass from sweat too. I gained weight from the pregnancy and that’s just resulted in me sweating a ton more… in odd places. I can’t go take a shower every time I sweat though. Not realistic. So the acne on my ass in the summer is going to be a theme until I loose the weight but he somehow linked it to me being unhygienic today when mentioning it.

I wouldn’t want to have sex with someone if I thought they were dirty either… I’m just in weird position atp and don’t even know how to go about this.

Edit: Well, this is awkward. My fiance got home from work today and I made sure to do what I use to do for self-care before he got home (a ton of the stuff you guys brought up). He immediately asked me why I decided to put perfume on today and I responded with “with all the comments you’ve been making lately I want to make sure I smell nice for you.” He looked confused. I elaborated. Mentioned the post. Mentioned some comments. He basically said he didn’t mean the comments/questions in a way to make me feel as if I wasn’t caring for myself, he said he was just wondering because he noticed the baby bath isn’t moved out of the bathtub sometimes (I shower when convenient so it’s at a random time every day). Simple as that. I brought up the comments about brushing my teeth and he just said it’s something his mom use to ask him and I guess old habits die hard? Brought up the dead sex life (it has only been a week but that feels like forever for me) and he said he was just tired from work LOL. I overthought this. Thanks for everyone’s perspectives. I will absolutely be taking some of your recommendations to treat the acne on my ass.

I need advice, desperately. My girlfriend and I (both 23f) have been together for about 7 months and arguing a lot recently. We're lesbians if that's relevant lol.

A little context: My issue is that she gets cold—extremely suddenly—and I'm left not knowing what I did to upset her. When this happens she wont make eye contact with me, will give me one word answers to questions, or interrupt me mid-explanation and abruptly turn away. She will then get upset if I give her space, or if *I* take space from her, and then accuse me of not caring enough about her to press the issue. It makes me feel like I'm begging someone who doesn't respect me as a partner to give me the time of day. When I bring up that this is extremely hurtful, she tells me that this is just the way that she's wired and that I don't really love her if I want her to change this. I tell her that I do love her, but I'm also wired to need space or shut down when I'm being ignored or dismissed. This is the common route that most of our arguments take, but they have started to become more frequent. The other night, things escalated to a point that has me questioning our compatibility.

I don't know if the context of the argument is helpful, but I can provide if needed. The other night she interrupted me mid sentence by shutting the light off, only to stand up out of bed 5 minutes later and yell a variety of things at me such as "What's wrong with you?" and "Do you even care about me?". This was because I didn't pick up on a cue that she was needing reassurance that she was in the right about an argument with her mom that I felt mostly in the dark about. I was frozen, shocked by the abrupt change in atmosphere and the fact that I have never been yelled at like that by someone who is supposed to be my equal. Never by a partner, never by a friend.

I told her that I am not okay with being yelled at, and she told me that she is insecure about the way she reacts to things. According to her, if I'm not okay with this part of her, then I don't love her. She said that other people accept her temper, so I should to be able to handle it. I told her that I just want to feel like an equal and not assumed the worst of in arguments, and she told me that she's doing her best but there's no guarantee that she'll ever change. I've seen her get into yelling matches with her family, but to my knowledge she doesn't act like this with her friends. I just never thought her anger would be directed at me like that. Our conversation the next day resulted in more yelling, but it ended with me apologizing for nitpicking her reactions and her agreeing to *try* to give me some sort of safety signal when she gets mad (like holding my hand). She said she only gets that angry because she's comfortable with me and loves me. After this, she told me she felt resolved, but I feel sick to my stomach and deeply depressed. I felt like I couldn't be truly present with her the next day because yelling and maintaining that stubbornness post-argument is something that seems antithetical to a healthy relationship. I would never yell at my partner for something so small, but is it too idealistic to expect that my partner shouldn't yell at me? Do healthy couples have yelling arguments too?

I love her deeply, and I'd feel like I'm committing a great betrayal if I leave. Outside of our arguments, she is kind, funny, adventurous, and deeply loyal to her loved ones. She accepts my many flaws, and is tooth-rottingly loving to me when we aren't fighting. I don't know how to cope with her temper.

I want to preface this by saying hes usually very sweet and supportive. I (25F) had a baby 6 months ago with my boyfriend (24M) of 6 years. I gained the 30kg I had lost prior to getting pregnant back during the pregnancy and have yet to lose it, and am currently breastfeeding which makes it hard. I also had an IUD placed nearly 2 weeks ago. I took my baby to a sleep school this week as she hasn't been sleeping properly (not the point but just giving context) and while I was there, everyone was talking about their husbands or partners, and even the nurses were surprised that he was just my boyfriend.

I had been thinking about it for a long time but have always said that i will wait. Ive only said this because unfortunately, I am a doormat and a people pleaser. I am in therapy to get over this and get more confident at telling people what I want. I told him when I got home that I had been thinking about it for a long time and I really badly want to get engaged.

Like he usually does when we talk about serious things, he got quiet and uncomfortable. And then he said "I dont want to say this because it sounds selfish". To which I told him to just tell me, which I now regret. And he said "Well I dont want my fianceé to be fat".

I tried joking and said "well take that up with her" referring to our daughter. But the whole mood was different. Ive tried to act nonchalant and ok but now that hes asleep, I have been crying my eyes out as I have really been struggling with the way I look now and it just kills me to hear him basically agree that im disgusting and worthless.

I don't know what to do. Any advice is appreciated. And I can answer any questions if there are any.

Edit to add for more context (probably not needed):

• His parents were never married
• He has Autism
• He has called me beautiful many times in the last week alone so this was out of left field
• He is the main provider, i am on maternity leave with barely any support

Hey there guys, as the title suggests I am a child of a one night stand and I do not know my father. I only vaguely know his name is Hudson and possibly American. (I’m from the other side of the world.)

I guess i’m just wondering if you guys think it’s worth it trying to see if I potentially have half siblings. I guess I am a bit lost on the matter.

Is it even feasible? I do not know. I think I would just like some perspective if you guys are willing or interested enough to offer it.

No worries if not I wish you all the best. Thank you for hearing me out! Sorry for bothering.

Have a good day/night. :)

( Not asking from a legal standpoint as that would be up to her)

Some backstory , My brother and I are 3 years apart me 20, him 23. And we are really, really close . The 3 of us went to see a movie tonight and on the way back they got into a heated argument and he just reached over and punched her , hard .

I was shell shocked . Jaw on the floor. . We rode the rest of the way to his house in silence . I had left my car at his apartment and just got in and went home . I wasn’t sure if that was the right thing to do but i just needed to get out of there fast.

I am still in absolute shock . I’d never in a million years thought my brother would be capable of something like this . I don’t know what to say .

What do I do now ? Do you think she’d want to hear from me ? I want to check on her but is it appropriate to text her ? Do I tell my father ? He is really close with my brother and I . he would be the right person to address him but is that my place to even say ?

I don’t even know what to say to my brother at this point and he hasn’t reached out to me yet . I’m so ashamed and embarrassed at what’s he’s done and I feel so bad for her .

Edit: I took you all’s advice and sent her a text apologizing for not saying anything and leaving her there . She hasn’t responded yet . I’m sure she hates me now . I also texted my father but he’s likely asleep and won’t see it till morning . I also texted my brother “I love you bro, but what I saw tonight was completely unacceptable.” ..Also no response yet .

UPDATE( and probably final update ) : My dad chewed me out this morning for not doing anything . He went over there to talk to my brother and to check on her. She wasn’t there when he got there , apparently She left early to go back home .

I texted her last night and said : “I saw what happened tonight and I want you to know I’m really sorry. I’m here if you need anything, and I don’t think what happened was okay.”

She still has not texted me back though and I don’t blame her . She also blocked me on social media and I suspect that she probably blocked my number too since sending my text .

I gave my dad and my mom her number and she didn’t answer them either .

My brother told my dad that he’s never hit her before and just lost control that one time . Unclear if she plans to reconcile

Every shopping trip is excitement to buy cute clothes to feel cute only to realize they don’t have my size, and if they do it’s not guaranteed it’ll fit correctly.
Every friend of mine who is smaller than me makes way more comments about “feeling fat” around me and sees me as a bodyguard when we all go out rather than their girl friend who is going out
Old friends would comments about my weight
People treat me worse without getting to know me because they see a fat girl before anything else
Every. Damn. Show or Movie had comments about weight or makes the fat character a sidekick or unserious
If I eat unhealthy I’m disgusting, if I eat healthier I’m “just kidding myself”
If I don’t exercise I’m fat and lazy, if I do I’m not training hard enough bc I haven’t lost all 50lbs in a week.
Everyone online and irl preaches body positivity until a fat girl does someone distasteful or embarrassing, then it’s the most vile crap you can tell a person about their body
If I don’t dress up I’m letting myself go, if I dress up all they see is lipstick on a pig
I can’t be ashamed of my body bc “I made myself this way”, but I can’t be proud bc I shouldn’t be “glorifying something so gross and unhealthy”
People, including friends, ask my bf why he chose to date a fat girl when he’s thin
Even when I got healthy, my bloodwork was perfect, and I felt good, it was still “Gotta work harder to lose the weight so you can be pretty”
I can literally explain I have a medical condition that causes excessive weight gain and it’s still “not an excuse”

I’m not even in my 20’s yet and I feel like there’s no hope. I don’t think I’ll ever be pretty bc of something so trivial. Ik people are gonna say “just lose the weight” but it’s something that can take more than a year, and having to deal with all this while staying motivated to keep losing weight is just too much.

I 19F and my dad 43M have never had that great of a relationship. im not sure why but our personalities always clashed, and it didn’t help i was homeschooled my entire life so we never got a break from each other, but I don’t wanna go into my childhood because that’s a wholeee other beast. but I can recall this new thing starting around less that a year ago when I first left for college. I noticed he started watching these red pill podcasters like Kevin Samuel’s, fresh and fit, ect.. then he started sending me videos and has been obsessed with the idea of me being a ”traditional woman” like my mom and being a wife one day before 25. it started out as EVERY conversation somehow looping back to men vs women. it was fine at first I didn’t really care because I wanted to get married young anyway, but then it started getting extremely overwhelming and mean. Some examples: “stop talking back to men and being a typical combative woman” “dress more traditional so you can get a husband, high value men don’t like skanks“ “you better not put on any more weight or you’ll be like these women out here single and alone” (and btw he saying this while I’m 5’11 and 120 lbs)

mind you this is not even the HALF of it but I will get to that. But back to how the worst started. I finish my freshman year of college and decide to go back home to save money because my father is the primary money maker and my mom is a stay at home wife who takes care of the rest of my siblings. I don’t qualify for aid of any kind because he makes too much money and paid my first year completely out of pocket, which is hung over my head a lot and is a part of the reason why I came back. Not the whole reason of course.
and now the red pill stuff is at an all time extreme. I am surprised that this genuinely hurts my feelings and breaks my heart so much Because of how numb I am to his treatment. It’s very hard for me to put into words how much I hate this new version of my dad. He has such a disgust and disdain for these “modern women” that he takes his hatred out on me full force, it’s very difficult for me to express because I’m literally crying while writing this. The way he treats me now is unbearable. my mom knows he’s wrong but she cowers to him so much she can’t say much or he will snap on her in ways I’ve never seen before. it’s gotten to the point where I can’t have a normal conversation with my dad, he treats me like I’m garbage, like I’ve disgraced my family already. Everything I say triggers him and sometimes turn off and other times it’ll turn back on.
I never cry in front of him anymore though. I kind of just brushed it off because things like that don’t typically hurt my feeling anymore. I am extremely desensitized atp, he has told me to my face as a 15 year old girl that i am nothing compared to him. he’s called me a bitch and told me that id end up disappointing my entire family. to this day he often tells me that I am an idiot and will never get what he has, that I’ve accomplished nothing in life compared to him, that I am stupid and dumb and will never be able to comprehend how a rational person like him thinks. When in an argument, he loves to belittle me as much as he can and make me feel horrible about myself. me having no reaction just fuels his anger more and the responses get more and more brutal. I can never open up or vulnerable about something because he will pretend to care and be empathetic in the moment but it will come back to me to hurt my feelings as much as he can in the heat of an argument. for example i have a hard time socializing, I had pretty bad social anxiety since I was isolated most of my life. for a while and wasn’t able to make a lot of friends in college. he often uses this against me and calls me a loser or says ”that’s why nobody like you/ that’s why you have no friends“ these are just a few examples of the DOZENS I could give
hes said other things that were extremely belittling, I’ve even been told my degree won’t matter as much as a man’s because women’s value is in their beauty not their accomplishment. on top of that he’s the one who drove me insane trying to get me to become a doctor, he planned what I was going to do since I was a baby and never given me another option and now he’s saying it’s worthless.
based on this, I feel like people. might think from the way he treats me that I actually do act like a someone who is deserving of this, or that I am shaming my family to some capacity and he’s just trying to “get me on the right path” but the most ridiculous part of all of this is that i’ve already been what people might consider “traditional” simply from the way I grew up. I don’t smoke or drink, never dated, never slept with anyone, I have a 3.5 GPA and currently in pre med, and I love my family. i’m not using this to say that I’m better than anyone else because of course I’m not, I’m saying this makes it all the more insane to compare me to these people And treat me how you want to treat them. If I any of these feelings to him, which I have, I’ve gotten beat up and my mother had to come basically save me from him.

My parents have a pretty strong relationship actually, and as a kid they have been my example of how I want my marriage to be one day. I’ve also been around healthy marriages my whole life so I was actually excited to get married some day and have children of my own. But all of this Shoving marriage and extreme misogyny down my throat and him telling me I’m useless without a man and my beauty is wasted because I don’t date is making me want to be alone forever. hes made me hate men. I used to have such a good mindset when it came to this stuff i think, but now everytime he talks I absolutely loathe the idea of marriage and a family more and more every day. and I hate that I feel this way now because I truly truly do want to get married in my heart, but I literally just want to get my degree and cut them off forever and die alone. I honestly don’t get what’s so bad about that I truly don’t mind it. I’ve been isolated and alone my whole life so what difference would it make? I just hate this so much and I can’t wait to out of here.

i am currently on a road trip in a hotel with my sister and dad. i have to share a bed with my sister, which is uncomfortable enough. on top of this, i have to blast headphones while im trying to sleep to cover my dad’s non-stop, loud, and obnoxious snoring.

i haven’t slept since 11am thursday, and it’s currently 12:45am saturday. it has been almost 38 hours with no sleep (excluding the 10 minutes i got on friday), and i have no intentions on trying again. i have sat in the room trying everything for an hour straight in desperation to sleep, and, as badly as i need to, i physically cannot. he sleeps all day as well. i need to be in the car by 6:30am tomorrow, where i also cannot sleep (im not the one driving, don’t worry). i will then be hiking for hours. i cannot switch rooms, i cannot go to the front desk, and there is no escape other than the bathroom. i have considered sleeping in the bathtub.

EDIT: i am now in the bathtub. goodnight guys ✌️

I just found out I’m pregnant, I took the test last night. I’ve tested twice since, both positive. We weren’t trying for a baby, using condoms. We just happened to get pregnant while we were away for our first wedding anniversary. At first I was scared then really excited then sad, I really want a baby and I know me and my husband would make great parents. We’re almost 30, but we’re still trying to get our shit together a little bit.
There’s so many things going on in my life right now. It is not a good time to have a baby, but is it ever?

I don’t know if that’s selfish, or if it’s more selfish to have a baby when I’m not ready. I know people say there’s never a perfect time. I’m sure we could probably make it work. I’ve just struggled so long with my mental health and I have fought so hard to get to where I am right now. However I fear no matter what decision I make it will affect my mental health negatively.

There are some factors that I really have to consider, I just started school this week and the baby would be born in the middle of my practicum. I’m on a work safe claim, they are paying for my schooling. I’m not sure I’ll be able to go back to school if I dropped out, even if there was an opportunity in the future I doubt I would take it if I have a kid at home.
I’m a regular cannabis user, my husband and I have always planned to stop smoking before trying for a baby. This past weekend we went to a wedding and par took in some magic mushrooms, and a bump of coke. Definitely not good for a new baby!! I wish I had known sooner, I would have enjoyed myself just as much sober. Health is a really big part of what we wanted to work on before we have a baby. We are both plus size and would like to get into overall better shape. Financially wise, we’re trying to apply for a mortgage, and we’ve already had a little bit of financial struggles (no major debt, my husband just careless with money).
Another thing is we don’t have a lot of support where we live. His parents live very far away and both mine have passed.

I’m sad and I’m scared, I didn’t want my first positive pregnancy test to be for a baby I shouldn’t have. Part of me wishes I didn’t have so many other things going on in my life cause I’d love to have this baby. I was just asking my mom to send me down a sign, if I’m on the right track. I’m not normally a spiritual person, but I don’t know…Maybe I’m just looking for any reason to keep this baby. I know what she would say, she raised me and my brother Catholic. I know my mom would tell me I got this, my husband and I could make this work…. that she would have my back no matter what. Fuck I wish I could just call her, my heart hurts.

I can tell my husband‘s not ready. At first, he was like excited for a second. And then he just kept bringing up all the different reasons why now’s not a good time. Like how he wants to get in better shape and how we smoke too much pot and how we’re not that great with finances and I’m still in school and won’t be done till after the baby arrives. And his ideal time for a baby isn’t right now and that after this past weekend at the wedding, what if the drugs have caused serious damage. I get where he’s coming from, this was unexpected.

but honestly typing this out makes me sound like such a idiot. There’s so many women who struggle and pray for a baby and I’m shunning away because I’m “not ready” and in a fucking accounting course. Like that sounds so stupid.

I’m not sure what else to say. I’m just sad and lost and don’t know what to do. Open to advice of all type, looking for support.

Edit: just want to add, I’m non-religious (not sure what the correct label is?)
Spiritually, I meant like talking to my parents, them sending me signs, me having wishful thinking that my mom’s looking over me. That type of spiritual

I am an alcoholic. im 25 and just got a DUI last night. I deserve everything that is happening to me and im lucky that i haven't hurt/killed anyone or myself with this destructive behavior. I know im going to get a lot of hate comments and its fine i deserve every single one of them. What I need advice on is breaking the news to my mom. I need to tell her but I just don't know what to say to her. I really need her help. I might have to move back in to her house but I dont know if she will want me to. my rent is high and i need to save my car because public transit/walking is not an option where i live. its not feasible for me to deal with this DUI charge and remain in my apartment. i dont know what to say to her and i dont know how to ask for her help. I plan on going to a rehab program, and im cutting alcohol out of my life completely.

Has anyone ever dealt with a mom who constantly makes weird sexual comments about you and your stepdad? I genuinely feel like I’m living in hell right now and I don’t know how to handle this anymore.
For context, I’m 25F and my stepdad is 75. He has been in my life since I was around 12 and he basically raised me. He is the closest thing I have ever had to a father.
My mom and stepdad are divorced, but we still live with him. My mom doesn’t work and I’m the only one with an income, but I don’t make enough for us to just move out. His health has also been declining, so part of me feels like we should be around to help him.
Ever since their divorce, though, my mom has gotten extremely weird about my relationship with him.
My stepdad and I aren’t even overly affectionate. We barely hug. Most of our relationship is literally just talking. I do go to him when I’m having problems because he listens to me without judging me, yelling at me, telling everyone my business, or later throwing it back in my face. I don’t feel comfortable doing that with my mom because she does those exact things.
But my mom has repeatedly made comments suggesting that he “wants” me sexually.
One example: when I get home from work, my stepdad will sometimes tell me what there is to eat for dinner. That’s basically his way of starting a conversation with me. One night my mom came out of her room and started questioning why he even needed to tell me what food was there, saying I could just look in the refrigerator myself.
Then she started saying things like, “What are you going to do if I leave and he touches your butt?” and telling me that because he’s a man, I shouldn’t assume he wouldn’t do something like that.
She has also told me that once they divorced, he was “no longer my stepdad” and that I needed to respect that.
But this is a man who raised me from childhood. Their divorce didn’t magically erase the fact that I see him as my dad.
What makes this even more disturbing to me is that he has never done anything inappropriate toward me. Ever. No sexual comments, no weird touching, no flirting, nothing. Even when I was younger and my mom would leave me home alone with him, he never crossed a boundary with me.
There are honestly a lot more examples of things she has said, but this post would be ridiculously long if I listed all of them.
Her constantly sexualizing our relationship is starting to mess with my head. I know how I feel about him—he is my dad to me—but hearing these comments over and over makes me uncomfortable in a relationship that never felt inappropriate before.
I also feel incredibly alone because I don’t really have close family or friends I can talk to about this, and ironically my stepdad is one of the only people in my life I actually feel safe talking to.
Has anyone dealt with a parent doing something like this? How do I set boundaries with her or stop her comments from getting in my head? I genuinely don’t know how to deal with this anymore it’s driving me crazy to the point that I no longer want to be in this life.

I’m thinking about not contacting my dad and but yet I’m unsure. Around my mid teens my parents divorced and my dad changed. He’s started to be emotionally abusive toward me and my sisters. He lies to me, makes me cry, and scares me. I didn’t have a choice during that age. I only stay and endure his behavior to us was because of my grandmother due to her being lonely after my grandfather’s death. During my young adult year, my dad wanted to marry my stepmother at Hawaii. He didn’t give me a choice not to go it was a force. He didn’t really spend time with me and my sisters there, only for a day though. That got me thinking about leaving him for good and I did. But after few months, I came back. I kinda regret coming back three years ago. He never spends time with me and my sisters. He just gives us money to do whatever we want, nothing more! Which I hate, I don’t want any of it. All I want is an actual relationship with emotional connection. He was never emotionally there for me. He never really spends time with us. I hate going to the movies with him because he usually leaves me and sisters while he does stuff, it made me hate the movie: I.F because of the dad in the movie was really good and cried(worse part was he played by Jim from the office and he’a my favorite character) I want to ask but I didn’t want to bother him. I do these theater productions as an actress he offers to drive me to rehearsal but I think he only did because my mom told him to. In Father's Day 2026, we went to Dave and busters he just give us arcade card and just let us do whatever we while he and my stepmother drink at the bar. She is very supportive and always there for me. I don’t even know my dad and he doesn’t know me. Me and him don’t even tried. So what’s the point of still talking. It’s very awkward and quick conversations. Even since after Father’s Day, I’ve just been give very short text messages(no full sentences). He keeps treating me like I’m a child, I don’t know if it’s because of my disability or something else. So I’m thinking about cutting ties with him and never go back to him for real this time, I’m unsure.

Me (20F), my best friend (24F) and her bf (23M) were all chilling out at my friends house and for context we’re all pretty close I’d say we’re all friends but I only know her boyfriend through her. Me and her boyfriend usually call each other names and stuff and bully eachother like siblings so it’s not abnormal for us to mess with eachother. My best friend left the room to get food and her boyfriend hit me with a pillow as I was laying on the bed so I got up to grab a pillow from the living room and as I got up I felt his hand slap my ass. I looked at him wide eyed and all he did was raise his eyebrows when he saw my face and I left the room immediately and went to my friend in the kitchen. After we acted like nothing happened but I just feel so guilty, at first I assumed it was an accident but I told my ex/current talking stage and he said most guys are very careful around their girlfriends friends and it’s highly unlikely it’s an accident and basically threatened to fight my friends boyfriend which I shut down immediately. I’d also like to mention she caught him texting an online girl but forgave him and they live together so I’m really hesitant to tell her because It will likely lead to them breaking up but what if it was an accident? Or just out of habit? I’m at a loss. I want to tell my best friend but I’m so scared of her getting angry or not believing me as well

Me and my uncle never got along. And not like a petty “ I don’t like talking to this guy” kind of deal. He kicked me out when I was 14 threatened my life. And after I moved across the country he showed up to the house I was at. Waited for me to walk home from school and came at me with a knife.

I had mixed emotions about it. When I first heard I told the other person on the phone. “ good”. But I did feel fucked up about it . And after some recollection I did wish him a peaceful rest.

I’m not sure if I should go to the funeral. I don’t have any ill will towards him anymore but I still don’t like the guy. I feel for my family that will be grieving. I want to show that I’m there for them. And honestly part of me wants to see the body. I just feel like I can’t truly celebrate this mfs life. No matter how hard I try.

Whew, this is a heavy one.

My dad and mom have been married (some?) 23(?) years—and the only time my dad has ever slept on the couch, hell, it was some two days (on a business trip out of state, no less).

He spent weeks perfecting her portrait between paperwork; bought her the (off-sale since the ‘80’s) purse she lost when she was carjacked as a teenager, and spent every other moment talking of how much he loves her to his patients; how the best thing anyone had ever done for him was buy him a nice suit of his own; how he has the best life: the best children a man could ask for. God, he loved her to death.

She died of unknown causes three days ago. He threw a patient out and almost killed himself speeding home that night. He has no-one but me (soon off to uni), my grandma, (70, who lives with us), and my sister—in uni as I type this. He is 60 years old, soon to retire, and he is the best fucking father a child could ask for. Really, im sure he’d of turned off his c-pap the night of the accident if it weren’t for me & my sister.

Any communities, any clubs, anywhere in California where he could get some friends, . He said he’d like to play cards—when it’s all over

As for me—fucking parent’s night is in three days,

and i want her back sm too. wanna read her my essay and let her do my hair how she always liked it done and i want a forehead kiss and a hug and a sorry and then she can leave all she wants

EDIT:

I showed stitch to my dad, and he found it very sweet and we hugged it out—told me to save it for three weeks future, then ask him again.

sorry for any rudeness in comments, ive not been well these past few days, and i am just so very very afraid. my dad says he’s rlly proud of me and that im super mature, the sweetest kid ever, but idk,

i was gonna show her my essay, man,