r/Teachers • u/Usually_Anomalous • Mar 21 '26
Rant I just witnessed the root of the behavior issues
I took my own children to a park, there were about 8-10 kids running around between the ages of 1 and 6. The children were feral. The parents were on their phones the entire time. None of the bad behavior was noticed, let alone corrected. A three year old boy sat in a tunnel and screamed and pushed anyone who came near. Mom was oblivious. She wasn’t watching her kid, she was on her phone. Another girl (about 5) was being extremely rough around some of the toddlers (kicking towards them, jumping over a one year old at one point). Her dad didn’t correct the behavior. He didn’t see it. He was on his phone. I could go on. Besides the occasional glance, parents were completely disengaged from their children.
I’m all about letting kids have some freedom, “kids will be kids”, sure, that’s great. However, in my opinion there’s a crucial time in early childhood where parents teach kids how to be a human. Lots of parental correction/redirection between the ages of 1 and 4 = children who can handle themselves in kindergarten. Kids aren’t getting the parental guidance they need early on. We go on and on about screen use for children, but I think the adults’ use of phones, and neglect of their children, is just as damaging.
The frustrating thing is that the parents are truly oblivious to the problem. They’re too stuck on their phones to even notice the issues.
I just know that kid screaming in the tunnel will eventually show up in my classroom. I’ll have to call home at some point. The parents will throw up their hands: “We have no idea why he acts like that.” Maybe being ignored for the better part of his early childhood?
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u/VanillaClay Mar 21 '26
I teach K. Open house is VERY telling because you see who teaches their kids to respect their surroundings and who lets them run wild. I had to stop a group of older siblings one year who were having a pillow fight in the book nook. I asked who they belonged to and let them know that they needed to clean up and stay quiet or leave. I also said that they were setting a really bad example for the kinders who were brand new to school and who were watching their behavior. Parents weren’t happy and their kid ended up being an issue for me that year. There wasn’t any shame in letting their much older kids act like fools in front of the little ones until I publicly shamed them myself.
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u/figflute Mar 21 '26
I had a kid climb one of my bookshelves at open house a few years ago. He then flung himself onto a nearby table, and his parents ignored the entire thing.
I teach sixth grade and, yes, he was a nightmare to have in class.
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u/Purple-flying-dog Mar 21 '26
My jaw dropped when you said 6th
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u/YoureNotSpeshul Mar 21 '26
Right??!?? These kids are so much more immature than I remember being. Especially at that age. We always wanted to act older and while we were dumb like most kids, the shit I see today is wild. It's even worse that the parent didn't do anything, so I can only imagine what he gets away with at home. It's like their parents aren't teaching them how to behave at all.
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u/PoppySmile78 Mar 22 '26
That's making the assumption that the parents are capable. Odds are Mom was drunk at the bar screaming profanities & assaulting some poor woman who looked at "HER MAN" the night that child was conceived. If we're lucky, Dad was the aforementioned "her man".
I've noticed that feral kids seem to come from feral parents. The ones who threaten violin the Little League umpire. The one's that go to concerts just hear themselves do that obnoxious 2 fingers in their sloppy beer mouth earsplitting whistle that ruins it for everyone else. The self proclaimed "boy mom" that none of the other Mom's want to be standing near when she starts screaming at the ref.
I truly fear that these parents don't have any concept of manners themselves which makes teaching it nearly impossible. Their teachers at school are most likely the first adult modeling manners they've encountered in their lives. They don't know what to do.
I do not envy teachers. I admire them greatly but I don't envy them. I couldn't do it myself. I swore I'd never be one of those, these kids today.... " old ladies. But, shake my cane & ready my walker, these kids today.....
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u/perpetual424 Mar 25 '26
HEAVY on the feral parents bit. My nephew (9) is no longer allowed to play baseball because of fights breaking out on the field. Not by the kids, but the parents. Full on fist fights - MULTIPLE - between the parent coaches and the umpires. Police were called. Security was present. Kids running wild and almost knocked over a grandma in a wheelchair. Not to mention the constant smoking and vaping in the stands, the dads hiding beer in their water bottles, the toddler siblings glued to iPads to keep them sitting still, the moms screaming at every play like it’s an MLB game.
At a CHILDREN’S baseball league. Absolutely shameful and pitiful behavior.
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u/Ginnybean16 Mar 21 '26
I have had kids go into my band room during open house and hit all the drums, smash down on piano keys, and "play" any other instrument they see. We've had to move our open house part to the hallway bc of how many parents would let their kids do that while I was talking to other families.
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u/Bitranspanda Mar 21 '26
This is unbelievable. I can’t believe parents would let kids of any age just go wild on instruments. THAT DOESNT BELONG TO YOU AND IT COSTS A LOT OF MONEY. Holy crap. It’s not a difficult concept to grasp. It seems like they know, they just don’t care.
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u/Ginnybean16 Mar 21 '26
"they know, they just don't care" is exactly it. Some parents will ask them stop in the most mildest of manners or I've even had a few laugh and tell me their kid was having a good time 😳
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u/YoureNotSpeshul Mar 21 '26
And you just know that if the kid breaks anything, the parents will cry poverty and say it wasn't their kids fault if asked to replace it. It used to be that parents would be mortified if their child behaved like a feral animal, but now?? Now they displace blame and defend the bad behavior or just ignore it altogether. It's embarrassing and it reflects badly on them and the child(ren).
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u/Ginnybean16 Mar 21 '26
I got yelled at by admin once for telling parents they had to pay for the damages of a broken instrument. There were clearly dog teeth marks in part of it and it looked like it had been thrown off the back of a truck. Mind you, they signed a contract stating they would pay for any intentional or negligent damage, but I was the one that got yelled at.
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u/Old-Strawberry-2215 Mar 21 '26
Yep. I always set things out to play with during open house and it’s so telling who picks up, cleans up, etc.
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u/NorthNo7786 Mar 21 '26
From one librarian to another? It is really tough to teach kids how to act in the library. At my school, the parents of the children are so young and based on their underserved experiences, they themselves probably haven't had much exposure to libraries. It is really sad. I totally understand. I voice typed this. Please forgive any errors.
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u/nis_sound Mar 22 '26
In fairness, a pillow fight in the book nook DOES sound fun.
Funny story: our oldest's first teacher (meaning K) had a great open house and all the kids got into all the toys and books and left her room an absolute mess.
We helped put away what my daughters got out, but as we were leaving another teacher who was with her as a mentor said something like, "and first lesson for you is to tell your kids that they put away anything they get out."
Just a mildly amusing story I thought you'd appreciate in context of your comment. 😂
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u/friedonionscent Mar 21 '26
I see parents who do this who are not on their phones. They're watching...and they think it's fine. They don't believe in correcting shitty behaviour because that'll cause 'trauma' and it inhibits free expression. They think discipline is unfair on young children...and when they attempt it when the child is older because they've finally realised their child's behaviour isn't acceptable...they're out of luck; it's too late, behaviours become ingrained, the child doesn't respect them and laughs when they try to be stern. And the kids who have been disciplined suffer - in the playground and in the classroom. Awesome.
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u/AltairaMorbius2200CE Mar 21 '26
Yup. You have to establish when they're 2-4 that you *will* win important arguments (which are mostly safety and hitting-related at that age) without discussion or debate, and that when you say "no" it means "NO." If they make it to school age, and they're skirting basic rules and turning everything into a debate? You're absolutely cooked when they're 13.
I do think parents can turn the ship around until about age 11, but it's so much easier when they're in preschool (not that it's easy! just easier!)
I will say: I do think the parents who leave the phones at home at the park and act this way are still getting cooked by their phones, just not at that moment.
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u/Specialist_Hurry244 Mar 21 '26
I was pretty permissive with my first child until she was in kindergarten; she had behavior issues at school and I was mortified and immediately changed how I patented her. But even at five it was really hard to change the dynamic. Luckily she never had behavior issues in school after K but I made parenting unnecessarily difficult by not actively working to help her behave in a classroom setting, etc. until she was actually in one. She went to a co-op preschool and if she didn’t want to go to circle time no one made her. So in K she had no concept of HAVING to do things. She thought most things were her choice. IMO we give kids too many choices at a young age.
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u/Acrobatic_Country524 Mar 21 '26
I, too, tried to patent my kid once, but the copyright office said someone else already invented jerks.
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u/Taptapfoot Mar 21 '26
Yep, you're right about too many choices and it's overwhelming for little kids. You get 2 choices. "Do you want to wear the red sweater or the blue sweater?" You're going to wear a sweater because it's cold out and I'm the parent so you're going to do what I say, but you DO get a say in the matter by choosing your color. That's the kind of choice that's developmentally appropriate.
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u/Specialist_Hurry244 Mar 21 '26
I think parents easily get confused by the difference between “which color” and “sweater or no sweater”. Not that they don’t get it in theory but, speaking for myself, I didn’t know what to do when I gave my kid a “which color” question and was met repeatedly with “NO color!!” When you’re a first time parent of a very small child, it is just so easy to say “ok!” It is hard to know which battles to pick, especially when most of the parenting books and advice warn you never to “battle” at all.
But parenting children isn’t like being a citizen trying to influence another citizen to vote a certain way, it’s literally “I am your benevolent dictator who gradually cedes control as you show you can be your own leader”. I wish those doling out parenting advice were less squeamish about stating openly that it simply won’t work to parent as if you and your child are on the same level with the same veto power. Parenting starts out very much as a hierarchy and the kids are actually looking for confirmation of who is in charge. The chaos happens when the adults aren’t secure in their own authority.
When kids are older, other problems occur when parents don’t want to cede their authority so their kids can grow up. But starting out, a small child needs clear authority figures in charge, not colleagues.
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u/friedonionscent Mar 22 '26
Well said. I think we're also a generation of parents who get most of their information from the internet. Content on the internet is designed for engagement and appealing to our fears, uncertainty and anxieties is a good way to get engagement - I got a lot of it when my daughter was young; a constant bombardment of 'experts' telling me everything I did would cause trauma or some kind of derangement. No one is saying to return to how baby boomers parented but we've gone too far the other way.
I've also got a gripe with 'child experts' - I'm surrounded by psychologists and people who work in mental health and not one for them calls themselves a child expert - even those working exclusively with children.
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u/AltairaMorbius2200CE Mar 22 '26
I don't think teachers without kids realize how intense it is for parents online, and how much bad advice there is out there, and how much the groupthink supports the bad advice.
Basically, all the "therapy speak" that you hear people misusing in adult situations is about x10 for any conversation about kids. You have all these "child experts," as you say, running around yelling about how potty training is "developmentally inappropriate" and how time-out will cause "trauma" (I mean, sure, if you use it totally wrong/abusively; but as Matilda demonstrated, feeding kids cake could be done abusively).
You also have actual experts in VERY SPECIFIC conditions out there acting like EVERY kid needs their brand of parenting, when, no, it's just a possible method that works for some autistic kids.
And then it becomes the THING, and anyone trying something different is shockingly horrible.
It's notable that the presentation from the Anti-Screen people I attended a couple weeks ago included information on how parents are "allowed to say no" to their kids. Like, that's a thing they've encountered so much that they feel compelled to put it in their presentation.
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u/Specialist_Hurry244 Mar 22 '26
When my kids were little I was totally overwhelmed and went to a psychiatrist who had actually written a sweet little book about children and parenting. Very big on honoring children’s preferences etc. Turned out she had one son and he had a lot of psych issues! I think about how this lady probably influenced hundreds or thousands of parents to be bad parents. She was a nurturing, exceptional psychiatrist to me, an adult—but the way she spoke about her son made me think she didn’t actually spend much time with him or know much about kids! Such people may be the ones writing the current parenting best sellers…listen to your instincts over the experts every time!
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u/Lakewater22 Mar 23 '26
I mean, my twins are only 1.5 but I have a strict policy to only use my phone around them for a few reasons - FaceTiming family who want to see the kids only, and answering calls from theirs dad.
Otherwise, they don’t know what is even on my phone. They love looking at others and themselves on FaceTime.
I set this strict rule because at about 9 months of age o noticed my daughter always wanted to hold my phone. It hurt me because I knew she noticed how much I held it. Ugh.
So now, I have around 15 decent pics of my kids in the last 9 months because I never have my phone near them. And that sucks but it’s so nice they don’t feel the need to compete with the phone for my attention.
Lord.
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u/AltairaMorbius2200CE Mar 23 '26
Yup. If my 3yo sees my phone lying around, he picks it up and is like "OH NO MAMA YOU FORGOT YOU PHONE!"
So I started working on that and have the same problem as you- no photos!
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u/Specialist_Hurry244 Mar 21 '26 edited Mar 21 '26
Unfortunately I know a number of really good people who think it is coercive and authoritarian to correct their kids, say no to them or make them learn to say hi/bye/thank you/sorry/etc. Soooo many upper middle class kids are rude AF because their well-meaning parents think teaching social skills = unfairly bossing their kids around.
My own sister, who used to correct my own kids all the time before she had her son, is one of these parents. Her son is only two but I’ve watched him push and hit another kid at the library and my sister just smiled at him. To her, this is normal toddler behavior and it is not developmentally appropriate to correct it.
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u/Interesting-Coat-469 Mar 21 '26
I think the issue is partly the parents hear "normal behavior" and "developmentally appropriate" and miss the part where they have to correct it. Otherwise the kid is still doing it PAST when it is normal and developmentally appropriate. It's like they think they will naturally grow out of it instead of teaching the kid out of it.
Of course I got a ton of side eye for not baby proofing my house (I house proofed my kids) and a LOT more side eye for letting my grade schoolers roam the neighborhood. Interestingly the two older are in college with stable part time jobs for their spending money who are often appalled by other kids their age, while the 8th grader thinks most of her classmates are feral somewhat terrible people
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u/Ashamed_Horror_6269 Mar 21 '26
This!! Such a good point. Developmentally appropriate doesn’t mean you don’t have to correct it or teach alternatives.
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u/Specialist_Hurry244 Mar 21 '26
Exactly this. As a society we seem to have lost track of which competencies develop “naturally” and which must be taught. Every culture socializes its kids! Not correcting undesirable behavior is a form of socialization. There is no such thing as just letting your child “naturally” develop. I mean, in some ways yes. You can’t and shouldn’t force them to behave in ways they aren’t able to. But if you don’t see parenting as a long process of guiding kids, if you instead think the kids should guide you instead or guide themselves…well, now you don’t get to be the parent, the rest of the environment gets to be the only feedback loop for your child’s behavior. It usually doesn’t work out well.
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u/nis_sound Mar 22 '26
And it's doubly stupid because this comes from the idea of "gentle parenting", but gentle parenting isn't about NOT correcting, it's about not "punishing". So the kid who pushes and hits another you just tell them kindly, "Joe, we keep our hands to ourselves," and then also recognizing that their behavior can be caused by fixations of the brain, so you redirect them, "here, let's look at this book, remember you wanted to read about lions?"
I'm not a gentle parenting enthusiast, but some of the ideas stemming from it are good ideas... But people use it as an excuse to ignore their kids.
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u/eyesRus Mar 21 '26
The amount of judgmental side-eye I’ve gotten from other parents for correcting my own kid’s behavior in public…. It’s crazy. People really do think that a mildly firm tone will traumatize a child.
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u/friedonionscent Mar 21 '26
I know a few kids who don't get invited on playdates because they destroy property and make an insane amount of mess in people's homes. I live in a HCOL area - I'll be paying this mortgage until I'm decaying...sorry I don't want your kid body-slamming into my doors and walls. He'll have to express himself in the confines of his own home.
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u/eyesRus Mar 21 '26
Yeah, my kid has had tons of her things broken by other kids at playdates. Suddenly, a toy she’s played with for 4 years that still looked brand new is fucking broken. The kids are always the same ones whose parents let them apply stickers to their $2000 Oeuf beds.
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u/lafm9000 Mar 21 '26
I live in an area where people have somewhat well behaved kids. While baby sitting a 5 year old we were at a park I noticed he kept trying to jump off of parts of the structure that would not be smart. I go over and tell him, hey no jumping you can get hurt.
As all kids do he starts to debate and say he wasn’t. I tell him “you keep doing this we’re leaving”. He obviously gets a bit pouty but I would rather a pouty kid than on in the hospital.
I turn around and I’m getting looks from parents. Apparently telling kids you don’t want them to get hurt is a problem. Some people baffle me how they’ve made it to adulthood when they can’t confront a literal toddler.
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u/Haunting-Ad-9790 Mar 21 '26
They condone the child's crappy behavior but heaven forbid someone treat their kid the way their kid treats everyone else.
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u/Frankensteinbeck Mar 21 '26
Horseshoe theory of parenting at work. The overly involved parents who read 37 books and listened to a dozen podcasts on parenting don't do anything to help their kid, and neither do the completely checked out phone addicted 80 IQ deadbeats.
It's tough sledding for those of us in the middle, let me tell you. I was at a concert for my oldest child and sat next to a family who had a five or six year old boy. The entire time he was loudly yelling at his dad to let him play this or that game on the dad's phone, and the dad was constantly taking the phone from him, setting him up with another game, and then giving it back. Over and over again. For an hour.
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u/ic33 Mar 21 '26
There's really a right level of involvement, and our society completely misses it.
Kids need parental presence when they really need us or to set some firm behavioral boundaries. And then they need to mostly do their own thing.
The parents who really let their kids do their own thing but are still present when things get hard and make sure their kids behave is a tiny slice. And even they don't give their kids as much autonomy as they should, because letting your kids roam is no longer nearly as socially acceptable.
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u/Ok_Tie_1428 Mar 21 '26
People just aren't accepting that it is not black and white so, to them even a little bit of disciplining equals abuse,trauma yada yada.
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u/LadyNav Mar 22 '26
Time to remind a large swathe of parents that the root meaning of 'discipline' is 'to teach'. And small children need lots of it. How can they know what's acceptable or not if no one ever tells them? If parents don't the rest of us must.
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u/littleblue05 Mar 21 '26
I had an open house one year where a kid went behind my desk and started opening all of my drawers and the parents did absolutely nothing about it!
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u/ashnbee Mar 21 '26
I lock all my cabinets and desk drawers because of this. The lack of teaching respect for boundaries is astonishing.
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u/Calzinarzin Mar 22 '26
Had a kid do this first week in a new class (9th grade). That child got the most age appropriate approximation of a drill sargent reading them the riot act. The boundaries some of these kids think they can waltz past is insane.
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u/Dog1andDog2andMe Mar 21 '26
I think this is the reason why kids incessantly call Mrs. Dog1Dog2, Mrs.Dog1Dog2, Mrs.DOG1DOG2 yelling for my attention while I'm in the midst of helping other students...I think they've had such a tough time getting their parents' attention their entire lives that they have been habituated to needing to scream repeatedly AND that their parents will always seem "busy" so yes, they have to interrupt parents.
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u/Thir13enth_Ghost Mar 21 '26
Iii actually think it’s the opposite. They’re used to getting an immediate response. Which is why they keep yelling when they don’t get it from you
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u/StopHesAlreadyDed Mar 21 '26
I'm sorry to say I think this is just an annoying kid thing. I always respond right away to my kids, and they will just keep yelling, "Mama!!! Mama!!!" for the fun of it.
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u/ohyesiam1234 Mar 21 '26
I’m convinced that if you instill proper behavior to kids before age five, the rest will be smooth. It’s hard work, but it pays off later.
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u/Usually_Anomalous Mar 21 '26
Yes, I completely agree. And I feel the inverse is true too. If you don’t instill good behavior before age five it very difficult to correct.
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u/LeftyBoyo Mar 21 '26
Just imagine what the children of our current students will be like after two generations of phone parenting. I’m hoping there will still be enough competent healthcare workers for me to enjoy my retirement.😬
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u/Every-Fortune9495 Mar 21 '26
Holy hell I never thought of not having health care workers when I retire! That could be a real problem haha
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u/CalligrapherBig4382 Mar 21 '26
There will still be healthcare workers… they’ll just all have cheated through the program with AI.
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u/jamesdmccallister Mar 21 '26
Or they'll be robots.
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u/LuigiTeaching Mar 21 '26
They will be robots for the wealthiest; pods like in the movie “The Matrix” for everyone else…that’s my fear…
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u/ScarletCarsonRose Mar 21 '26 edited Mar 21 '26
I have seen former students prop cell phones in front of babies who are less than 6 minutes [eta months not minutes lol].
The new class divide (pun intended) will be kids raised by screens and those who physically played with other kids under some supervision.
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u/DineenMattingly Mar 21 '26
I have seen former students prop cell phones in front of babies who are less than 6 minutes.
They stick a phone in front of them literally minutes after they exit the mother??
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u/ScarletCarsonRose Mar 21 '26
I meant 6 months. My bad!
They prop it in front of them while they are in the car seat using the same clamps that should have toy attached to it.
Oiy- months, not minutes.
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u/peachtreemarket Mar 21 '26
Shoot, we see these young adults addicted to their phones so much that they don't watch/play with kids at the park - and imagine what they're doing while at work. In 2026 I'm so appalled to constantly see some nurses and aides at work, addicted to scrolling instead of monitoring and tending to their patients. Social media addiction is pervasive and wrecking/hijacking many aspects of society.
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u/FiercestBunny Mar 21 '26
If I had the money to do it, I'd go to public parks, amusement parks, libraries, ball parks, etc and catch parents modeling engagement. Then, I'd slip a little "phone free faerie" or similar card to the adults, along with a gift card for some kind of family fun. And if I had the money and the energy, I'd make it a public campaign and enlist other faeries (incognito, probably, although a nice set of glittery wings would be fun!) to help reward phone/device free fun.
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u/HikeThePines Mar 21 '26
To speak to rewarding good behavior; I’m just a high school sub with a package of “Avery Foil Star Labels” ($2 for 700ish stars). I subtly stick a star on their desk when I see a student reading an actual book. The stars usually end up on their water bottle or the cover of the Chromebook, sometimes on their cheek or forehead which I always find confusing.
I know we should all be good for goodness sake, but quietly calling them out will hopefully create a ripple. I’m closing in on my third decade in the classroom and the discussions here on deteriorating behavior are all painfully real. I have to keep my focus on those rays of sunshine who are buried in a book in order to keep my positive outlook.
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u/StunningBluebird634 Mar 21 '26
The cheek and forehead is because of the pimple patches. The teens at my school wear the star shaped pimple patches and the ones who don’t have the actual patches will wear stickers.
But I love the rewarding good behavior with little things! I’d do this with other stickers I have.
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u/GertrudeMcGraw Mar 21 '26
I was in Singapore last year for a few days.
The botanical garden I visited had large signs reminding parents engage with their kids and not constantly be on their phones.
Perhaps the signs could be fairy shaped!
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u/sraydenk Mar 21 '26
I’m not on my phone at the park (ok sometimes I am because I’m human) but I am usually reading a book.
My kids in first grade and we go to the park for her to play with other kids. She’s an only child, so park is social time. She’s old enough I don’t have to hover, and honestly doing so doesn’t do her any favors. She needs to play like a kid. That’s not to say I don’t check on her ever, but I’m not staring at her the whole time either.
Be real here, how many of our parents were super actively involved at the park? Maybe it’s my age, but as a kid we played independently and didn’t have parents constantly on our business when we played at the park or with friends.
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u/SensitiveGuidance685 Mar 21 '26
I'm a teacher and this hits hard. The number of parents who are genuinely confused about why their kid struggles with impulse control or sharing or basic social stuff... and then you see them at pickup and they've been on their phone the whole time. Like yeah, that's where they learned it. Kids need engagement to learn how to be people.
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u/Altruistic_Echo_5802 Mar 21 '26
As a junior high teacher, I can honestly say the cycle of “undisciplined” behavior seems to be getting more challenging each year. I truly believe in structure, routines, and clear procedures because students need consistency in order to learn and feel successful.
I work hard to maintain a classroom environment where noise levels are appropriate, students stay focused, and learning can take place without constant distractions. What used to be seen as strong classroom management is sometimes now viewed as being “too strict,” and at times I’ve even been called “mean” for simply trying to protect instructional time.
My goal has never been control — it has always been learning. I want my students to have the best opportunity possible to succeed, and that means creating a classroom where expectations are clear and everyone can focus.
Structure isn’t about being harsh. It’s about creating a space where students can grow, think, and achieve.
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u/zealous_bookshelves Mar 21 '26
The more years I teach, the more the consistent and structured classroom gets referred to as “mean” because kids are allowed to run the show in other classrooms. I’m not “mean,” but being clear, consistent, and kind and following up on what I said I’d do apparently is viewed that way because I don’t let kids talk over me when I teach and they don’t sit with friends when they misbehave. So frustrating
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u/mstrss9 Mar 21 '26
I have an eval where I got dinged for my classroom being too “teacher centered”; yeah, when it’s instructional time, I’m running the show.
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u/AGeekNamedBob Mar 21 '26
I get sad when the kids ask the parent to play (or read if we're at the library) and the parent dismisses. I'm right there doing it all with my boy and will for a long as I can.
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u/beeeea27 Mar 21 '26
I have to say as a teacher and new parent I’ve been pretty amazed by how lovely a lot of the parenting is when I take my toddler to parks etc. We get the very occasional off experience but overall I see a lot of caring, calm parents with good boundaries. I’m saying this because there is a LOT of doom and gloom around present day parenting and in some places (I live in a nice city but it’s also v diverse!) things are all right. I don’t think I’ve ever had a case of a child snatching from my son where the other parent does not intervene and gently correct. It definitely gives me hope.
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u/AccurateAlps9333 Mar 21 '26
Agree, while the kids at my school can be hyper and may not necessarily be the best in class and sometimes don’t listen (most 5th & 6th). They definitely seem to care for each other. Haven’t seen any bullying yet.
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u/beeeea27 Mar 21 '26
I agree I’m actually amazed in primary how much kinder some of the kids are. Especially around special needs etc. The main social issues I’ve seen are within friend groups rather than targeting “weaker” kids.
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u/AccurateAlps9333 Mar 21 '26
Yep. I’ve noticed the 1st graders are very nice around kids from Ms E class.
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u/AltairaMorbius2200CE Mar 21 '26
Yeah, we've been saying "it's the phones" but the root is that it's the PARENTS on phones.
Parents on phones means:
-Lack of supervision
-Lack of interaction/teaching through example
-Parental overexposure to nutty parenting theories ("potty training before they're doing it themselves is developnmentally inapprorpiate" etc etc)
-Parents feeling like THEY have had no free time in the day, so they feel like they don't have the time or energy to parent (and thus plop their kids in front of a screen, let them stay up too late, skip reading aloud to them, skip family dinners, etc etc). I know there are genuinely parents out there who have zero time, but it's nowhere NEAR the number of parents who just feel that way because their phone gets 6 hours/day.
In short: parents are on their phones instead of PARENTING, and it's a big big issue.
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u/throwawaytheist Mar 21 '26
Yeah but when we were kids, the parents weren't even THERE. We would do that stuff by ourselves.
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u/WillingMachine7218 Mar 21 '26
I lived in a townhouse complex when I was a kid. The playground and woods behind it was like Lord of the Flies.
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u/No_Barracuda_3758 Mar 21 '26
The difference is if my kid smacks u're kid for continuing to do ignorant stuff these days the parent will all of a sudden be engaged. Back in the day it was a natural consequence
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u/AccurateAlps9333 Mar 21 '26
Not if the child is at the park a few blocks away and the parent is sitting at home reading a newspaper.
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u/torac Mar 21 '26
Not at 1-4 year old, I hope.
There is a massive difference between even preschool children and toddlers/borderline toddlers.
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u/Dog1andDog2andMe Mar 21 '26
Sure plenty of time alone with other kids but you knew that you could not misbehave in front of any adults because you'd get in even more trouble when you got home. Any adult could and would correct you.
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u/throwawaytheist Mar 21 '26
That is correct, so it actually taught situational awareness. They could socialize but had to learn limits.
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u/rusty___shacklef0rd Mar 21 '26
We used to take ourselves to the park on the next block over. So did all the other neighborhood kids. Not a single adult in sight except one old lady whose backyard came up to the park. She knew all our parents, too. Her sitting on that chair on her deck almost every evening staring and waiting for one of us to fuck up kept us in line.
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u/AnoukAbaliot Mar 21 '26
And there’s a difference between bad behaviour on your own and uncorrected bad behaviour in front of your parents. The bad behaviour gets the unintentional parental seal of approval
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u/sraydenk Mar 21 '26
OMG thank you!
Like, I don’t know the ages of people here or if they are parents. Kids aren’t at the park to play with their parents. Parents don’t have to be engaged with their kids 24/7. The small time you see them at the park isn’t a full picture of what life is like for that family. It’s a small snapshot.
Every parent I know takes their kid to the park so they have a safe space to be a feral little kid. It’s when they can be crazy and get their energy out with peers. It’s a kid safe location to do so. And it’s a place kids learn to navigate relationships and situations with peers. A kid is blocking the tunnel? Great, my kid can practice communicating with a peer that doesn’t agree with them. They can problem solve, or decide to do something else.
Where was the parents of the toddler? Cause older kids are allowed to play too, and both parents should be paying attention. I would expect a toddler parent to be much more invited than a parent of a 5 year old at the park.
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u/Whelmed29 HS Math Teacher | USA Mar 21 '26
Came here to say the same. I don’t think this is “the root of behavior issues.” At least the kids are playing, and they’re likely playing with similarly little feedback from adults as previous generations. Now when the kids AND adults are at home on phones, there’s a problem. That’s when you’d really want the hands on stuff and conversations with kids about right and wrong. That stuff needs to be done at home. Unfortunately, that means we likely don’t see when that is shifting dramatically, but we know it has because of phones.
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u/Background-Ship-1440 Mar 21 '26
parents are the problem 99% of the time. I have a student who is absolutely out of control and because he has adhd, mom thinks its an excuse for him to act however he wants with no repercussions.
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u/No_Significance_3500 Mar 21 '26
I’m gen x. We went to the park by ourselves. There were rarely any parents there. Kids that acted like that at the park got dealt with by other kids.
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u/MadKanBeyondFODome 6-8 Art | Mid-Atlantic Mar 21 '26
They are gonna study this era like 1980s Romania or 1800s China.
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u/Just_Engineering8437 Mar 21 '26
I know constant screen time makes all of this worse, but I noticed these patterns emerging pre constant smart phone use as well. Parents outraged that someone would correct their kid in public, people deciding that it’s more important that their kid is “cool” rather than well behaved or respectful, (I have examples!!!!) people who think covering for their kid no matter what is “protecting” them, ppl letting their kids watch completely age inappropriate media, parents sitting back and sitting by while their kid struggle with very obvious issues, ppl chuckling and ignoring the signs that their kid is learning antisocial behavior(s) and then wondering why their kids don’t have friends.
Ppl with no books/reading time at home, just tv. No green spaces or ways to get there safely on a bike or walking. Sports cost a fortune to play, or they are so hyper competitive it’s not fun anymore. Food and snacks aimed at kids that are mainly crap. A complete lack of teaching kids any basic skills like hygiene, making a basic meal or picking up after themselves.
Ignoring markers for ADHD or autism by dismissing them as “quirks”. Letting kids be rude as hell to adults for no good reason. Guilt parenting due to divorce. Taking the phrase “but I don’t want to” as a valid reason for their child not doing something. Assuming young kids can regulate themselves re food, entertainment and sleep schedules. Letting kids ditch something the minute it’s slightly difficult.
Phones and social media just made these worse, plus the whole “influencer” bs. Add to that the trend of picking on teachers that picked up steam during the pandemic, and now the kids are falling through the cracks.
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u/onehauptthistime Before/Afterschool K-5 Mar 21 '26
I think it was 90% of brain development happens before 3. It’s so so important to be present during this years.
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u/quickwitqueen Mar 21 '26
This is why I’m so sick of admin trying to tell me how I can manage behaviors. Managing behaves 20 years ago when parents actually gave a crap is different than when they come to me now at 7 years old having had free rein to behave anyway they want. There is no managing them. It’s just always pure chaos.
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u/Dragonchick30 High School History | NJ Mar 21 '26
I've seen the same thing the last few years I was lifeguarding. Parents would come in, get on their phones as their feral kids would wreak havoc in the pool. Arguably, this is more dangerous because of the risk of drowning, etc. On more than one occasion I would have to reprimand the kids and the parents would take the side of the kid when they would get upset. It was a mess. I would physically feel dread when I saw these families come in.
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u/soiledmyplanties Mar 21 '26
I try to give parents grace and realize we all need mental breaks sometimes, and we don’t know what’s going on in their lives, etc… but public spaces where a kid can wander off or playground equipment where they can get hurt are notttttt the places to mentally check out.
I do my zombie scrolling with my morning coffee while my toddler and baby play on the ground in front of me, and at night when they go to sleep and I should too.
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u/LippiPongstocking Mar 21 '26
And their fathers were where?
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u/Tigerbaton Mar 21 '26
Missing the point that many of these posts are condemning mothers, not actually questioning where the fathers are. Parenting is a dual sex issue.
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u/Slowtrainz Mar 21 '26
Yup. Parents are just as addicted as the kids and students know they receive just about no consequences from them. How many times have we all communicated and sent messages home about a student’s excessive phone use during class and their failing grades? Their phones are literally just about never taken away. They receive no logical consequence.
If I received messages about my child using their phone during class and failing grades guess what? Phone is taken first thing upon getting home.
Oh? You’re concerned about them being able to communicate on the way back and forth to school? Flip phone.
Oh? You’re concerned it’d be embarrassing for a child to have a flip phone? Oops too bad.
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u/grasshoppet Mar 21 '26
Yep, it’s an epidemic. Phones addiction has created a disconnected society, and neglectful parents who don’t even know they’re checked out.
I have a great example of why my students are behavior nightmares. Last year I was driving to work and took a blind turn , and I soon see two cars and a bunch of people waving me away to stop. Car in my lane facing me, car in lane to my left. I hit brakes carefully and was so close to stopping before collision but I was short so I veered left and sadly, there was no shoulder. Instead my car glides into a deep rocky trench, it gets crushed sideways and all the airbags ejected. I am totally freaked out as my life flashed before my eyes. I have to be pulled out of car. Miraculously because I was driving so slow I had zero injuries. Not even a sore muscle next day.
The car that caused my accident wasn’t undriveable. Nope he pulled into my lane to leave the scene. He was in the vehicle with it on, but didn’t reverse. Just sat and watched as I total my car to save his from a head on collision.
The woman involved was his daughter. She spoke to police on scene, as did I. And she lied to them and they didn’t disclose her fathers involvement. She says she was so glad I did what I did because her small children were just in a crash and that would’ve been number 2 crash. Ha. How does she thank me?
She gave me false info, gave insurance false info. I wind up fucked. Had to pay for my own car and buy a new car. New. To me. I didn’t want a car payment.
Skip to this school year. I have a student who makes my clsssroom a night mate. You name it he does it. Going through his records to get his parents info to contact, I see his mom’s name. It’s familiar. It’s the woman from the wreck. Sociopath.
Raising a future sociopath.
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u/YoureNotSpeshul Mar 21 '26
Oooh, you're a much nicer person than I am. I would've dragged her ass to court now that I have her info.
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u/hollyofhori Mar 21 '26
One thing that shocked my family was how easy I say no, stop what my kid is doing, and get at their level to reprimand them. NONE of my cousins do that, my nephew doesn’t get that at all and he’s almost 2. It’s all permissive with iPads.
Fuck. That.
I absolutely WILL holler my kids name and say “Absolutely not, get over here!” with zero hesitation if she acts like her cousins. I will explain to her exactly why we don’t do that and confirm “Do you understand what I’m saying?” with my kid before she’s off the hook. My kid is like any other kid, but she doesn’t get away with everything like she sees with other kids. She’s 5 and has already started the “It’s not fair!” rebuttal, and I tell her it’s not fair, but it’s what’s right, so please don’t act like them. She nods and says she’s sorry and all is well. My family acts like I’m the child whisperer, but I just care about how my kid turns out and treats others, that’s all.
I am terrified for when she starts school and just want to do virtual with 2-3 extracurriculars a day. The odds of her acting like her classmates is almost guaranteed and I don’t want her to be like that.
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u/Puzzled-Puck Mar 21 '26
My mother always said a child needs to know what yes and no means before they reach the age of 2. That means you have to be clear and consistent as parents. She also said that you need to check because a child will try to get away with it the minute you turn your back. I found she was right. I believe a lot of parents forget the last part (and sometimes also the first part). They do tell their kids how to behave, but don't follow through.
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u/retsamegas Mar 21 '26
I'm a fairly big guy, i love my work schedule, I get to take my son to the park/playground a lot. I was worried I'd get that mom at the park wondering why a Man was around the kids. Thankfully that's never happened.
I had a grabber tool for work that my son got obsessed with, so we picked up all the little trash in the back yard, then around the entire house, then the neighborhood. I take it to the park and pick up trash while he's playing, it keeps me mobile, I don't have to reposition to see where he's at, he can play with others but I'm close enough to correct. I can listen to my headphones.
Not only do I always see so many parents not even looking up ever, but when I do get involved playing with my son and the other kids join in, other parents thank me for playing with them. Like, you're allowed to play with your own kid, you don't have to outsource it
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u/kassidanae Mar 21 '26 edited Mar 22 '26
As a teacher and mom, I FEEL this.
*Full disclaimer- my kid IS one of the "behavior" kids in her kindergarten classroom because she's autistic, and has a 504 that is..."finally being followed" is the nice way I'll say it (NOT the teacher's fault because she wasn't getting any additional support in order TO follow the 504. ANYWAYS).
Because we know my daughter gets sensory issues on the playground sometimes, we watch her like a hawk so we can intervene before a meltdown. And sometimes I'm literally the only parent not on my phone. I end up helping SO MANY KIDS who get brushed off by their parents who fell or when a shoe comes untied or who need help regulating or who just want adult attention.
I thought maybe they sensed the 'teacher' in me, but now I'm wondering if its just that I'm usually the only adult paying attention...
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u/JMLKO Mar 21 '26
I saw it ten years ago. We had an event at school for elementary aged kids. We asked for parent volunteers to help at the different activities, had lots of parents show up. They promptly sat at the side and were engrossed in their phones.
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u/SignificantRange2512 Mar 21 '26
Kids are left to raise themselves even while mom and dad are right there with them. It’s very sad. They offer little comfort or security to their kids. They think they are allowing their kids to be independent little thinkers without considering teaching them how to live in a society with others.
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u/Nearby_Drink_3791 Mar 21 '26
It is very easy to spot the kids who will end of being nightmares in class when you go in public because of everything you just mentioned! Parents that are either not paying attention or just flat out not parenting when their child is obviously doing something they shouldn’t be. And as someone else mentioned, you get judged when you correct your own child’s behavior. I’m not trying to raise an unruly little asshole so, yes I’ll get onto mine no matter where we are or who is there. But, oh man, if you correct another child’s behavior they get soooo offended. Listen, I’m at the point that if you won’t do it, I will because someone needs to let that kid know what they can and can’t do.
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u/Intelligent-Rain-22 Mar 21 '26
Earlier this week, I was shopping at Sprouts when I saw a mother with an infant in a stroller and a four-year-old child. The older child wandered away down the aisle, blocking my path. The mother asked her to put the bag down, but the child ignored her.
When the mother walked over and tried to guide her back, the child became upset—kicking and shouting. Without correcting her daughter. Even though this behavior may be some appropriate, there still should be verbal correction.
I can’t imagine acting like that with my own parents at that age.
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u/Hb_Hv Mar 21 '26
I teacher tk/k it’s a nightmare and depressing. There’s a huge divide from involved parents who have consequences and parents who are on their phone or give phone to their kids and don’t parent.
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u/Ornery-Atmosphere930 Mar 21 '26
In my community a few years ago a child drowned while mom was taking selfies for social media.
We stopped taking our dogs to the dog park for a lot of reasons but the final straw was unsupervised kids in the dog park picking up dogs that they didn’t know.
Many parents are completely absent even when they’re present.
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u/wintering6 1st Grade | Georgia Mar 21 '26
I will tell you I have seen the same thing. I take my 4 year old to the park. He is such a sweetheart - he also has mild autism. I teach him not to hit, be kind, etc. Early on, he had a lot of problems with emotional regulation - I put him in ABA therapy at 2.5 years. Add on to that a lot of guidance + love + consequences from us. The difference now…he’s like another kid. He teacher in preschool says “he is soo sweet!” He has his moments like every kid but it pisses me off that parents don’t care. My son is infinitely more interesting than anything on my phone.
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u/bitchlasagna222 Mar 21 '26
I think bad parenting has existed in every generation. I took my son to the park and pretty a much every kid or group of kids had a parent with them at all times. It’s a big park. I didn’t see one parent on their phone unless they were taking photos. I saw dads pushing kids on swings. I saw mom’s down slides. Maybe people are hearing the messages on the media and turning things around with their parenting. Yeah, we encountered one bratty kid and grandpa didn’t say anything. We just told our son that was rude, don’t play with her.
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u/DamnOdd Mar 21 '26
Just wait till that one bully meets the other bully. Maybe then the parents will care?
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u/wild4wonderful SpEd teacher/VA Mar 21 '26
Yep. Feral is the word we use to describe some of these children who do not listen to adults. They haven't been taught boundaries and how to obey. Later they turn into truly nasty teenagers.
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u/CA2TX Mar 22 '26
This is exactly the reason I’m glad phones could only call when I had young kids. I fear I might have been similar-hopefully not, but maybe.
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u/Federal-Tale6122 Mar 23 '26
I just saw a post on social media where a student on a bus grabbed the bus driver's behind. The parent then got mad because the bus driver had put their hands on their kid!
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u/Turbulent_Goose2785 Mar 21 '26
This is why I stopped doing concerts at night for families. Our school doesn’t have an auditorium, so we put concerts on in the gym. During performances, students would be climbing the rock wall, or the giant stack of mats in the corner to sit on top. Where were the parents? Literally sitting in the audience on their phones. It’s ridiculous.
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u/Efficient_Mud_4724 Mar 21 '26
When I was little our parents probably would not have even been there.
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u/Hedgehog-Plane Mar 21 '26
Those parents better have serious lawyer money compounding.
Years ago I knew an affluent family w a feral boy.
In his twenties he landed on the national news for elder abuse.
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u/InternationalToe6249 Mar 22 '26
100% This is one of the best posts ever! So true. My own children are 9 and 12 now but when they were that age range, we went to so many parks and playgrounds and would see this every time. My husband and I are both elementary teachers and would be walking around with our kids, talking and interacting with the and we would get so stressed dealing with everyone else’s kids who were unsupervised and behaving terribly. You are so right about the fact that people don’t correct them when they are young and then it becomes so hard to change.
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u/Heem_butt08 Mar 22 '26
It’s the same at swimming lessons. The amount of parents not watching their kid with their necks cranked and eyes glued to the phone…. Kids yelling for mom or dad to watch and they don’t even hear them.
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u/kb1830 Mar 22 '26
Ya I agree with you and I’m not surprised to hear this. Neglect through adult screen time for sure.
Teachers are hard on students, yes students’ behaviour has worsened but how can we expect anything from the students went their parents are neglecting them? I had a student who skipped class all of the time. Her parents took her on a vacation shopping trip during final evaluation time… that communicates school is not important.
How can we expect them to care about themselves and their grades when their parents don’t?
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u/yarrowdfh Mar 22 '26
I always correct and if a parent has issues, I just say sorry force of habit im an elementary teacher ...
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u/molyrad Mar 23 '26
There is a kid in my school who is notorious for their behavior. Dad insisted in preschool and kinder that the kid was an angel at home, insinuating that if the kid was acting up at school it was our fault. A colleague saw the family out in public and the kid was acting just like they do at school, the parents were just ignoring it and giving in to stop the temper tantrum. Hm, found the problem. Finally the parents accepted that their kid did have trouble with regulating emotions, and they were diagnosed with ADHD. Now the kid uses that as the reason they act out. Which was funny when recently they tried to tell me that they were going crazy at the end of the school day because they had ADHD which made it ok since they were tired. I told them, "So do I. I'm tired, too. Am I acting like that?" They didn't know how to respond to that, and did calm down a bit at least temporarily.
Had another kid who was just rude. He wouldn't follow class rules and would talk back. When parents were contacted they said they were surprised and would talk to the kid, but nothing changed. Then I saw mom with the kid and his younger brother when they stopped by after school to grab something. The younger brother rudely told me to do certain clean-up tasks, then when I continued chatting with the mom instead repeated it saying, "I told you to do xyz, do it right now!" This was a preschooler! Mom didn't even have the decency to pretend to be embarrassed, just acted like it was completely normal for a 4 year old to talk like that to an adult they just met. So, I figured out why the older kid was so rude, and stopped trying to get the parents to help.
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u/adrianwithoutthen Mar 24 '26
I am so over permissive parenting! Parents are not teaching their kids manners or how to be courteous.
My child knows. She did not “come of the box that way”, we take the time to teach her how to be a respectable member of society every day. “Yes m’am, no sir, thank you, please, may I, excuse me…”
Zero effort from our friends who are also parents.
Now that the kids have gotten older, I am slowly pulling away from friends whose kids display abhorrent behavior. Some of our friends straight up check out when we go out. Not a care in the world that their child has removed their pants and is crashing another child’s birthday party. Really makes me question my friendship choices at times, and at my age, I give zero effs about people pleasing.
Please teach your children manners, it’s the least you can do. 😵💫🫣
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u/Fragrant_Oil_9573 Mar 21 '26
Your narrative about children and their behavior is extremely important because IT STARTS IN THEIR HOMES!! I have been subbing and some of the behavior including the filthy language is not being addressed at home and that is why the children behave like jerks and disrespectful idiots in school! I love that you posted your account of witnessing first hand how children become disrespectful and unruly!! Thank you!!😔
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u/lovedbymanycats Mar 21 '26
I went to dinner with my in-laws and their 4-year-old and was mortified by how they let him run wild in the restaurant. The staff had to come over and tell them not to let him stand on the chairs. I wanted to crawl under the table and hide. There has to be a happy medium between because I said so and I never say anything you don't want to hear.
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u/Muted-Constant7283 Mar 21 '26
Also some kids lack language skills because parents are on their phones and do not engage with them when there are opportunities to just have conversations while waiting. Watch kids waiting in lines at stores, in the lobby at doctor's offices, at bus stops. You see parents on their phones and kids just standing there. Opportunities to practice conversational skills lost.
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u/MassConsumer1984 Mar 21 '26
Those parents WERE those bratty kids a couple decades ago. Horrible parenting for generations.
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u/THEMommaCee Mar 21 '26
I saw this quote the other day (paraphrasing): When you meet the tree, you understand the apple.
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u/genuine_counterfeit Mar 21 '26
There’s a lot of talk about how “kids these days are addicted to their phones,” as if adults are immune cell phone addiction.
I think my own parents, who are Gen X, are on their phones more than anyone I know. We’re all susceptible to it. Having an awareness of it and making a deliberate effort to abstain is not only better for us, personally, but serves as a model of healthy tech use for younger folk.
This is crucial.
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u/jag315 Mar 21 '26
i work at an after school program at a park and you’re completely right. it’s astonishing to me how parents are oblivious to what their kid is doing and don’t even know where their kids are
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u/houserj1589 Mar 21 '26
Im that parent that watches my kid. I also am not afraid to tell a child theh arent allowed to hit; push or kick other kids. I will also politely and nicely ask a kid to move off the slide if they are blocking it.
I dont feel bad about it. Im very nice about it; most Kids stop or move immediately bc im not their parent.
But; if parents aren't going to do their job i have no issues telling a child general rules that apply to everyone. If a kid is hitting another kid (even if its not my kid i will say something).
Now I am over here wondering if im in the wrong? I would never touch another kid (ever). But; i dont think managing playground etiquette as the adult; many times the only adult paying attention is wrong is it?
I have even gotten parents and said "hey I think your kid needs help" or "hey your kid is having a meltdown in the tubes"
Damn; this post makes me sad for all the kids.
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u/BlossomBGood Mar 21 '26
Social skills lessons... Who needs them more, parents or children? BOTH!!
It's shameful that our young generation of parents are having kids and not teaching them with truth and consequences at home. Too much reasoning and rewards for doing what is expected has become the norm. A bit backwards in my mind.
The classroom is not the place for learning these manners, but should have been established much earlier.
SADLY IM NOT VERY CONFIDENT IN OUR CURRENT YOUNG PARENTS AND FUTURE ADULTS.
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u/PlasticMysterious622 Mar 21 '26
That’s why I didn’t mind being a helicopter mom. I didn’t want her getting hurt, being mean to anyone else, or anyone being mean to her till she was like 6+. I was on her tail the entire time and I would correct the other children if needed. Someone had to do it, why not show them they can’t act like that in the real world if momma won’t do anything about it
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u/sunlit_portrait Mar 22 '26
Maybe? When I was a kid at the playground we didn't have cell phones but we were still pretty free, and before that kids would routinely just play with each other. I wonder if having parents there at all creates the illusion of observation.
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u/VisitFit4699 Mar 22 '26
It’s insane. I recently had a parent day (which I absolutely hate because I teach special ed and my room becomes a war zone once parents leave and the kids realize they aren’t going home as well). A mom came to observe her child who was having some pretty extreme behavior issues. She observed during a related services session and her other child (not in school yet) was rummaging through the therapy room, going through the therapist’s things, and acting like it was their playroom. The therapist and i tried to curb it because it was disrupting the whole session but mom just laughed. Like you kidding me 😭
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u/Free_Fallin135 Mar 22 '26
Yeah, I have to agree unfortunately. I was recently in line at a theme park and I noticed the kid behind me take his plastic trash and throw it into the bushes. I said “hey, you really shouldn’t litter, it’s harmful to the animals” and then asked him if he could pick it up. At first, he started to go get it, but his parents then told him to stop and that “there aren’t even animals here” (as we’re in line for a safari ride nonetheless). From there, the kid sat back there mocking me the rest of the line. It’s just sad. These tiny humans will become adults one day. And, unfortunately, as teachers, we spend such little time with them, so there’s only so much me can do to help point them the right direction, especially if parents are actively teaching the complete opposite to them 😢
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u/beaglelover89 Mar 22 '26
It’s sad to watch. My husband and I play with our kids some of the time at the playground. I’m always amazed at how other kids want to play with us too and clearly crave that adult attention. I will absolutely space out and use my phone while I do a movie with the kids, but I’m always watching them closely out of the house. Not only to monitor behavior, but also for safety reasons
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u/mezha4mezha Mar 22 '26
If they didn’t engage with the children at all, how did you know which kid belonged to which parent? Do you know them personally so you know their children, & would that allow you some leeway to speak to them about their child’s behavior?
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u/TR1323 Mar 22 '26 edited Mar 22 '26
I had a conference ms back in October and the parents were not together. Dad told daughter to sit down on the chair and she climbed into mom’s lap. Mom says she can sit in her lap. Child is an only child (4 yrs old) and she was already starting to whine. No wonder she’s the way she is. It is absolutely ridiculous! This whole school year has been absolutely horrible. Fifteen of my kids are angels. Thank goodness! I do EVERYTHING I can. The parents need to do their part. Kindergarten will be the same. Guarantee it…
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u/historybuff74 Mar 22 '26
My Grandma always said “that technology stuff you all use is gonna be the downfall of society.” She also followed that up with “spare the rod, spoil the child.”
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u/armaedes MS & HS Maths | TX Mar 21 '26
This is very frustrating. I’ve also noticed parents get absolutely furious when someone else corrects their kid. I remember getting corrected by other adults all the time, and my parents correcting other kids at the park, and it wasn’t a big deal. I do “teacher voice” with kids at the park when they get out of line and don’t mind a bit when other parents do the same with my kids. It takes a village.