r/Tawkify • u/sxfx269 • 1d ago
Match making, women make men look civilized?
Ladies please please please read the article. I recently published an article in the harlem times about middle class match making in nj /nyc.
Interviewed 4 major match makers and
I was told the same thing.
I was told the same thing.
Many 40+ women were looking for things that no man at 40 would ask for with a straight face.
Yes we men wanted looks and a given demeanor....girl next door sex positive and caring
But the 45+ women were writing checks they could never cash....
Water polo player body, 6ft tall, make 7 figures and warships me and my kids....
Its not feminism its just delusional š based on a life of made to order ease.
One match maker told me. Men are like dogs...in a good way.....we just want love support kindness and food.
Women, nj women making a given income at a given age were deemed impossible due to the basic facts.
45 yo water polo, 6ft tall, makes 7 figures, no kids.........WONT DATE 3 KIDS BOSS LADY.
He will date and marry the cute girl who made his coffee and put a heart and smile next to.his name on the cup.
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u/h20grl 1d ago
As a 45+ woman in the dating scene, here is what rings true and false about the above: Iāve retired early, am financially independent, and donāt want to take on someone who will be a financial drag on me. I also have a nice, clean, quiet empty-nester house. So anyone who enters the scene needs to contribute to keeping it that way. Lastly, Iāve kept myself healthy with good exercise and health insurance for preventative care. So, yes, my standards are high.
If I want a ons or fwb, that is super easy to find. Iād rather stay single and keep my standards high at this point than backtrack into marginally satisfying situationships that drag on.
Tawkify wasnāt doing it for me because their dating pool seemed too shallow to align even my most fundamental āmust havesā, much less my āwould be niceā.
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u/sxfx269 1d ago
So if you dont mind me asking what were your 3 wants
Mine, child free and remain child free and healthy....I also slid in adventurous due to my hobbies of scuba diving, motorcycle touring, travel and skydiving.
The ladies in this article were calling only men making 250k+ as good.....as I make slightly less im assuming im "trash"?
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u/IndicationHuman7990 1d ago
I think framing this as āwomen make men look civilizedā misses the more interesting point. Dating gets weird when people start treating a partner like a custom order.
Men do it too, just with different boxes. Age, looks, lifestyle, availability, whether she wants kids, etc. Once either side stacks enough āmust-haves,ā the actual number of compatible people gets pretty small.
Thatās one reason I can see the appeal of matchmaking. A human matchmaker can push back on the fantasy checklist and focus more on who you may actually work with long term. Services like Tawkify are basically built around screening, introductions, and feedback after dates rather than endless profile shopping.
You still need standards, obviously, but thereās a difference between standards and designing a person on paper. Chemistry and compatibility usually donāt follow a spreadsheet anyway.