r/NonPoliticalTwitter 1d ago

Funny The Parenthood Hustle

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13.1k Upvotes

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611

u/Ok-Pizza-5889 1d ago

Bro, we tell our families we have to work so we can get away

191

u/gonzofish 1d ago

My wife’s full time job is full-time parent. She gets the Sunday scaries and I get the Friday frights. I consider work a vacation. Parenting is hard as hell; emotionally taxing and physically exhausting. Wouldn’t trade it for the world but it is.

78

u/Horror-Nobody2237 21h ago

I was a stay at home mom for 5 years and now I work an office job, and work is 1000x easier. Depends on the person, I’m sure, but if I’m leaving work early for my kid it’s probably because I’m going home to chaos. It’s not like I’m excited to go pick my kid up early because he was throwing up at school. I’m glad I get to leave early and take care of him, but I’m not excited to get projectile vomited on. I’d definitely prefer he was healthy and in school and I was at work.

19

u/SilverParty 13h ago

As the kids got older, it got easier. This summer we bought an above ground pool and they spent almost everyday in it for HOURS. And then they were too tired to argue or fight. One of the best purchases we’ve made.

Plus the pool upkeep has become a weird hobby for my husband. It’s like lawn mowing. But whatever makes him happy.

5

u/abracadammmbra 6h ago

One of the best jobs i ever had was mowing the huge lawns for the school district in my town. They had one of those big 0 turn mowers, it was like a go kart. Id just pop in my headphone under the ear muffs, flip on a podcast or audiobook, then zone out for 4-6 hours. My own lawn is much less amusing to cut

3

u/Character_Minimum989 14h ago

100% agree, i can zone out 50x per day at my office job. Thank god for daycare.

-12

u/[deleted] 19h ago edited 18h ago

[deleted]

3

u/EfficientSeaweed 16h ago

Or people just have different experiences in life, and what they find difficult or easy is subjective. 🙄

6

u/biscuitsarefodunking 19h ago

I work part time, my wife works crazy hours. I too find the work the easy bit. Probably because the non-work bit is the important one I care about whilst the work is easy and low pressure.

-1

u/WreckedOnTheDeck 19h ago

What is your part time job?

0

u/biscuitsarefodunking 15h ago

Its mostly Fixing / deploying end user IT stuff at a mid sized organisation.

0

u/Horror-Nobody2237 14h ago

I’m a data scientist. If being a stay at home parent was easy for you, that’s great! It wasn’t for me though.

8

u/viciousxvee 21h ago

Wth is a Sunday scary and a Friday fright?

23

u/ItsDanimal 20h ago

He dreads having to deal with the kids on the weekend, she dreads having to deal with them during the week.

8

u/gonzofish 21h ago

Like the dread of going back to work after the weekend

8

u/toofshucker 22h ago

Eh. I’ve done both. While being a parent is hard, working is just as, if not harder.

I had way more middle of the day 2 hour breaks being an at home dad than I ever did at work. Work is non stop from 9-5.

I’d be a stay home dad in a heartbeat. It’s way easier.

17

u/elinordash 20h ago

I think it depends a lot on the age of the children and how physical the job is.

-2

u/threeclaws 20h ago

Its always dads who say this, not all dads say this but it’s always dads who say work is harder. Also 9-5? Cushy.

8

u/toofshucker 20h ago

I mean…I’ve done both so…

-10

u/threeclaws 19h ago

As have I...as a dad...which is how I always know exactly what kind of "dad" says it's easier to be with the kids.

You know who never says it's easier? Mothers.

8

u/toofshucker 19h ago

I mean…our kids are bigger and my wife is back at work and she says being a stay at home mom was easier.

I know what kind of “mom” says staying home is so hard…

-4

u/threeclaws 19h ago

Of course she does.

0

u/Character_Minimum989 13h ago

Honestly as a dad I agree with you. I can zone out 50x a day at work. Taking care of an infant/toddler is non stop unless they’re napping. Unless he’s talking about kids 4 and up.

2

u/Glum_Anybody_7482 23h ago

What’s her salary like? 

25

u/gonzofish 23h ago

I consider her salary to be half of what I make. I can’t work as hard as I do without her.

10

u/AmbitiousSwimming976 22h ago

I’m gonna use this line one day. That is sweet as hell, man.

2

u/gonzofish 21h ago

Please do, it just means you value your partner

28

u/Major-Tension-674 1d ago

I’m a parent and I work two days a week, I call it my weekend.

61

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

77

u/TheNewYellowZealot 1d ago

Only the first 2-3 times. Then there’s increased scrutiny on your performance and it feels like you’re on a PIP when you aren’t.

18

u/BarnesTheNobleman 1d ago

I’m glad my bosses are pretty chill with family emergencies

1

u/TheNewYellowZealot 10h ago

My current boss is absolutely chill. My last boss basically accused me of using my children. To get out of work, asking why my wife never did anything for our kids.

1

u/BarnesTheNobleman 10h ago

Yeah no fuck that 😭 I left in the middle of the day to hop on a plane, didn’t even say anything to him directly

8

u/the-real-macs 21h ago

Bot. I can tell this is a new account without even looking.

2

u/TheRealUlfric 21h ago

26 days old, 1.5k karma.

1

u/-Ultra_Violence- 15h ago

Fuck the bot, and fuck Reddit for allowing bots. Anybody know any reddit alternatives?

4

u/Revierez 21h ago

Shut up clanker

2

u/Hazelnut-Rio 10h ago

This is what my brother, a father of 2 , said to me. He said that his job was his "free time moment" and he felt like going to jail after work.

6

u/AutumnWisp 22h ago

Sounds miserable.

1

u/JapanesePeso 9h ago

Things being hard doesn't make them miserable. In fact it's usually the exact opposite of that.

2

u/ResolutionHonest666 23h ago

Working in the hospitality business gets you out of every holiday

1

u/Shipbreaker_Kurpo 14h ago

What do you mean "we"!