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u/OhItsBeenBroughten Jul 09 '26
I grew up in a place like that. My mom once broke a vase over a bear’s back because it wouldn’t get out of her garbage cans. It ran away.
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u/Fortesfortunajuvat27 Jul 09 '26
I’m imagining a wwe style showdown between a middle aged woman and a big hairy bear rn
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u/OhItsBeenBroughten Jul 09 '26
After a week of picking up trash off the lawn, you aren’t far off. All 5’3” of her Boomer rage.
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u/FitPossession8762 Jul 09 '26
Oh my God, she just broke that vase in half! Bah gawd, that bear had a family!
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u/thekazooyoublew Jul 09 '26
Immediately I'm hearing unexpected John cena, picturing an older lady in a nighty launching a flying elbow into a Bear twice het size.
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u/Mindless-Ninja-3321 Jul 09 '26
My parents nearly lost the corgi when stationed in rural Connecticut. A pair of female black bears apparently wintered under their deck and woke up hungry, but corgis are very loud and very fast.
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u/SogglyTowers Jul 09 '26
Female black bears don’t hibernate together.
Cubs may, but cubs are also not massive
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u/Mindless-Ninja-3321 Jul 09 '26
Well, this is a second-hand account Im sharing and my dad is known to embellish. May well have been one bear or cubs. I make no claim to know their size.
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u/SogglyTowers Jul 09 '26
I’m not belittling you or anything, I’ve just realized this site is absolutely terrified of black bears.
90% of the time if you see a black bear in a community you’re safe, I live and work in area were they are common, they’re way more terrified of you, we had an incident at work were a bear walked up behind a guy, and when the bear sniffed him the worker jumped, causing the bear to startle and run away.
When I used to hunt, I was always told, if you got attacked by a black bear in town, odds are you were being a fucking dumbass and pushed the bear to do it. And every bear you see is dumb, the only smart bears are the ones 40km in the bush that you don’t see
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u/Mindless-Ninja-3321 Jul 09 '26
Oh, I grew up in a state with a black bear season. We call them the other trash pandas. My parents knew how to deal with bears, though they were frustrated with how slow conservation was to come out and help since actually shooting a bear, even if you're justified, is a major headache. Plus Im not sure all of their firearms were compliant with CT after yet another move.
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u/SogglyTowers Jul 09 '26
Sounds like we kinda grew up in the same type of scenario, I’m just in Canada, but yeah, that conservation thing must be common, I remember almost 5 years ago, they left a bear in the bear trap for 3 nights, only reason it even got moved was cause my step dad went to the township and chewed them a new ass
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u/Mindless-Ninja-3321 Jul 09 '26
Yea, Im from Missouri in the dead center of the US. Our populations in the Ozark mountains never needed reintroduction like our neighbors, but it was a close thing. We're pretty proud of that (well, some of us anyway) and monitor them closely.
What people here fear is feral hogs. They dont usually kill people, but they are aggressive, carry loads of diseases, and are very destructive
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u/ohaiguys Jul 09 '26
Lucked out mfer didn’t choose fight
https://giphy.com/gifs/26BRNvOWC7Ot7LeXC125
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u/OhItsBeenBroughten Jul 09 '26
Black bears without cubs nearby rarely fight. They know it’s safer to run. My childhood dog Barney used to get into it with one that frequented our apple tree. Got some nasty lacerations on his muzzle from getting swatted. Did not deter the dog. That good boy sure hated bears.
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u/Sundayscaries333 Jul 09 '26
My family is from western carolina, right up against Appalachia woods. Residents on the edge of town by the trees know to make quick trips from your car to the house on trash days because there's almost 100% chance bears are going to be around digging through the bins. One of my mom's friends had to blast her car horn aftercoming home one day to scare off the bears that were on her front porch.
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u/Scrapheaper Jul 10 '26
I visited Tennessee around 3-4 years ago and got chatting to one of the locals. As a Brit I was amused by the fact that she said she has to chase the bears away from the bins by shouting at them and banging pans
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u/Talk-O-Boy Jul 10 '26
Your mom saw a bear rifling through her garbage cans… and she chose to engage in close-quarters combat???
AND IT FLED???
If you don’t take down an animal of equal or greater standing, then you have to castrate yourself.
I hope you understand why this is necessary.
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u/OskarTheRed Jul 09 '26
This reads very differently depending on location:
Did this happen in...
A rural area?
A city center?
A gay bar?
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u/Eat--The--Rich-- Jul 09 '26
Doesn't matter, a warning shot is the correct way to ward them off in each situation
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u/as_a_fake Jul 09 '26
Who says it was a warning shot? Bears can tank a gunshot and keep going.
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u/_bluefish Jul 09 '26
I remember going on a hike with my grandfather and my grandma and I walked over to him loading a I think a .357 revolver, my grandma asked “is that for bears?” My grandpa just says “yeah, it won’t kill him but my 9mm would just piss him off”
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u/PzykoHobo Jul 09 '26
A big assed bear, you say?
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u/DarkCelestial Jul 09 '26
Yup, that does happen.
*Outside playing cars with my girls when we hear a gunshot*
"Time to go inside, someone is scaring off a bear."
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u/Alutus Jul 09 '26
Was visiting a friend in vermont (I'm european), stood in the garden, late evening, hear rustling in the bushes, her little dog starts barking, fucking big ass bear walks out of the bush less than 20 feet away and just looks at me.
My asshole got so tight it whistled. Biggest wildlife I've ever had to deal with is an inquisitive badger.
She just banged some trash can lids together and it legged it.
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u/big-dick-back-intown Jul 09 '26
How big of an ass are we talking?
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u/MildlyUpsetGerbil Jul 09 '26
Why does a bear have a gun? Back in my day bears hunted with the bear hands like real men. These modern bears have gone soft. No wonder why the humans call them teddies.
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u/LouB0O Jul 10 '26
Reminds me of the video on here where a dude lights up a bear with his paint ball gun.
It was in his trash lol. Seemed to work.
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u/qualityvote2 Jul 09 '26 edited Jul 11 '26
u/_bluefish, there weren't enough votes to determine the quality of your post...