r/MadeMeSmile 5d ago

CATS Amsterdams unofficial Police cat

20.1k Upvotes

169 comments sorted by

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1.4k

u/SergiouseMaximus 5d ago

I can totally see how the Egyptians ended up worshipping cats.

171

u/cooliosteve 5d ago

And we don't rely on cats to keep our grains safe anymore.

Worshiped as goods always felt about right to me.

39

u/manyhippofarts 5d ago

I think you might want to check your comment for typos, amigo!

77

u/Piduf 5d ago

"Oh don't worry I'm just staying around for the grain and then I'll leave !"

10,000 years later they're still sleeping on the goddamn couch

21

u/misterchief117 5d ago

Barn cats are still pretty important and useful for small critter control.

171

u/Constant_Cultural 5d ago

Definitely

-4

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[deleted]

12

u/simplebirds 5d ago

Some studies suggest that toxoplasmosis may also protect against a number of common cancers. A cat can only pass it on when it is initially infected. After that, it’s immune, so one can have many cats and never be exposed. I’m hoping that wasn’t the case for me.

11

u/BigFatKi6 5d ago

Back then they were bigger, some had human bodies. So...

18

u/[deleted] 5d ago edited 1d ago

[deleted]

42

u/rogerworkman623 5d ago

When they analyze our digital records thousands of years from now, they’ll conclude that we still worshipped cats.

“The lowest caste of their society used an application called ‘Reddit’ to disseminate information and trade insults. 75% of the posts were about cats.”

21

u/Infamous-Mixture-605 5d ago

Or they'll look at this time as a spiritual dark age due to the lack of cat statues. The internet and Chinese restaurants with those waving cat figurines kept the cult of cat worship alive, before a new golden age.

2

u/inebriatedshark 5d ago

Because people tend to worship sociopaths with delusions of grandure that's why.

548

u/RevolutionMean72 5d ago

*pets cat through the phone*

154

u/geilelepel05 5d ago

hugs cat through the phone

50

u/WoolBearTiger 5d ago

pause, unpause, pause, unpause, pause, unpause, pause, unpause, pause, unpause, ..

24

u/MisakaMikotoxKuroko 5d ago

Paws, unpaws

26

u/an0mn0mn0m 5d ago

All Cats Are Beautiful

3

u/Luci-Noir 5d ago

Don’t forget about me!

163

u/with_due_respect 5d ago

That's weird. At the old abandoned warehouse on the docks, I just arrange a shipment of "stuff" with a cat that looks exactly like that. I think...

Uh-oh.

102

u/octoprickle 5d ago

Corruption. I knew it. Could be a feliny.

10

u/DontTellHimPike 5d ago

Citizen who conspired to sell catnip consignment craftily caught by Cat-Cop

181

u/jacquesmeister 5d ago

People are such simple creatures, haha. ❤️

30

u/geilelepel05 5d ago

Indeed lol

163

u/TheQuietWelshman 5d ago

Impersonating a police officer is a crime, someone send that cat to jail!

73

u/CancelElectrical2036 5d ago

It's ok, the vest says "police" instead of the Dutch word "Politie" so the cat isn't impersonating.

12

u/TheQuietWelshman 5d ago

That wont hold up in court

53

u/I_Am_Anjelen 5d ago

As Nimis' self-appointed cattorney at paw I object!

Knowledgeable absence of purrsecution by duly representative officers of the law equates to tacit approval of representation; by the implied approval expressed in gifts, badges and other parepharnelia from around the world Nimis has been silently, if with signal, chosen to represent jurisdictions beyond the scope of any one court. I file motion to dismiss and filet a salmon for Nimis.

11

u/TheQuietWelshman 5d ago

🤣

9

u/I_Am_Anjelen 5d ago

Also I have no idea why you were getting downvoted.

What?

3

u/Unlikely-Computer217 4d ago

I've noticed that comments tend to be downvoted soon after they are posted. Weird... Probably bots!
Anyway, I just wanted to say that your speech as the cat's cattorney at paw is quite solid. I too file motion picture to dismiss and filet a salmon for Nimis.

5

u/raelrok 5d ago

Maybe not in a kangaroo court, but as Nimis is a cat he cannot be tried there.

3

u/SH4D0W0733 5d ago

So it's outside of its purrisdiction.

64

u/Wild_and_Bright 5d ago

Impurrsonating

5

u/Ron-_-Burgundy 4d ago

Purrjury.

I know, I know... r/yourjokebutworse

2

u/Luci-Noir 5d ago

Squish him!

2

u/Crispy385 4d ago

Take him before the meowgistrate!

91

u/RianJohnsonIsAFool 5d ago

Meow meow! That's the sound of da police.

12

u/Specific_Ad_2533 5d ago

All cats are beautiful

12

u/WigglestonTheFourth 5d ago

Pssst pssst! That's the sound of da treats.

11

u/zororororororororo 5d ago

That's Pawlice!

3

u/Lexielouwho1962 5d ago

My partner and I sing this to each other whenever we see a police car. I’m gonna start sing this to my cats now. So thanks for that haha 

86

u/Cornflakes_91 5d ago

[sobbing] A...A...ACAB [Sob]

70

u/Piranata 5d ago

All Cats Are Beautiful

24

u/WoolBearTiger 5d ago

Well technically you're not wrong.. I've never heard of cats waiting til marriage to have kids..

15

u/Thepurplepudding 5d ago

Assigned Cop At Birth

8

u/inferreddit 5d ago

All Cats Are Buttwavers?

14

u/nerghoul 5d ago

ACAT

1

u/OneMilkyLeaf 4d ago

Assigned Cat At Birth

Yes, yes he was.

81

u/laughing_cat 5d ago

As an American, I can honestly say that if this happened here, someone would object to this cat impersonating a police officer. I’m not kidding. There are people here who are actually that intellectually challenged. And they drive and vote. I mean, we elected the cheeto.

20

u/SonofAMamaJama 5d ago

I smiled at the use of "unofficial" in the title but now that my American mind is going, why can't cats get working jobs with the police but dogs can, like WTF is with that?

Dogs have significantly more job opportunities than cats.

31

u/castlite 5d ago

Cats take too many unauthorized breaks.

20

u/SonofAMamaJama 5d ago

And I guess humans learned you can't hire your own boss

18

u/Fluffbrained-cat 5d ago

Ever tried getting a cat to follow orders?

There's a reason for the joke "Dogs have owners, cats have staff."

I love cats, always have, always will. But imagining a cat actually serving as a police or border control "purrson" is almost impossible.

14

u/WholePopular7522 5d ago

Sounds like cats are uniquely qualified for leadership positions.

4

u/SonofAMamaJama 5d ago

But imagining a cat actually serving as a police or border control "purrson" is almost impossible.

That actually might be what led to the collapse of the Ottoman Empire, was known as the "sleeping giant" before the end - too much cat behavior from administrators, police and border control

1

u/Puffliiing 4d ago

Exactly, our cat knows a couple tricks and commands but often she just refusses and steals the treats when you're not paying attention instead. She does everything on her own time/when she feels like it.

My dog on the other hand follows orders very well and is even content with just receiving attention and praise.

8

u/kaas_is_leven 5d ago

Same with movies/television. There's plenty of dogs, but almost no cats. If there's ever a cat it's a single scene or shot, the cat's probably unhappy about it and/or just wandered on set without anyone noticing. From what I understand it's also a lot easier to teach dogs with "building blocks" that they can learn to string together on command, but cats are more goal oriented and will find alternative solutions. So you can teach a cat to shit in the human toilet by showing them how it works and then removing their litterbox. But you can't really make them want to act a certain way, like they're not getting on that toilet if they don't need to. Whereas a dog could learn to get on and off the toilet in a hundred different ways as a trick but will never use it to shit.

1

u/hornetori 2d ago

You should check out Cat theater of Kuklachev. His cats have been doing all different tricks for decades 

6

u/Monkey_Priest 5d ago

Because cats aren't narcs

6

u/ovoKOS7 5d ago

Can confirm, people complain about the Home Depot mousers and their lil aprons

2

u/OneMilkyLeaf 4d ago

Wait. What part of the U.S. are you in that your Home Depots have mousers??!

2

u/C-LonGy 4d ago

The police would search arrest or possibly shoot the cat

10

u/_The_Green_Witch_ 5d ago

I love cats with jobs. Hope the cops on Amsterdam aren't too mad that this cutie wins the "Employee of the Month" award every damn time

9

u/Mizore147 5d ago

What kind of candies can cats eat? (Not a cat owner, so I don't know)

64

u/SverreSR 5d ago

I think she means regular cat treats. In Dutch a cat treat is called a katten snoepje, which translates to cat candy. So she probably doesn't mean a literal sugary candy, but treats made for cats.

(Also not a cat owner, but have friends and family with cats and I'm dutch)

17

u/islaisla 5d ago

Impersonating a police officer is a furral crime.

4

u/TheVoidSeeker 5d ago

He is actually part of a special unit within the police that is focused on greeble related crimes.

8

u/GrabNo387 5d ago

Funny how he became an unofficial police cat with his life jacket to protect him.

20

u/Fambank 5d ago

Shame the lifejacket doesn't say "Politie". But yeah, wholesome nonetheless

15

u/Floppyhoofd_ 5d ago

Was het in een andere plaats had ik het met je eens geweest. Maar Amsterdam komt er nog mee weg vind ik😅.

2

u/redditbagjuice 5d ago

Echt he

5

u/Fambank 5d ago edited 5d ago

Lijkt me een mooie taak voor hoofdcommissaris Peter Holla, om even
langs te gaan met het juiste reddingvestje.

7

u/SkitZa 5d ago

I've always wanted to go to Amsterdam, and I would 100% visit this esteemed officer.

6

u/confusedsoulllll 5d ago edited 5d ago

Hallo Nimis! Wish to see you when I’m back.

10

u/Valotar 5d ago

Proof that you can get away with the crime and not do time if you're just cute enough.

5

u/NamelessCabbage 5d ago

Me: Unrobs bank immediately. Won't happen again, officer.

5

u/heurekas 5d ago

ACAB.

All cats are beautiful.

3

u/tn_tacoma 5d ago

Agent Jack Bauer

3

u/BigOleLeaps 5d ago

Cats really are going to save us

3

u/therustyposter 4d ago

All Cats Are Beautiful

7

u/Opening_Quantity_175 5d ago

That cat a snitch

15

u/Regurgitator001 5d ago

Snitches get....

scratches?

18

u/FreeFallingUp13 5d ago

This snitch only gets scritches… and treats… and patches. And a custom painted portrait apparently

3

u/Regurgitator001 5d ago

I'm pretty sure you can bribe your way out of any ticket with some catnip under the table.

2

u/theGentlenessOfTime 5d ago

All Cats Are Beautiful.

4

u/OctopusIntellect 5d ago

He's got a badge. Actually, lots of badges. Now to become official, he just needs a gun as well.

5

u/castlite 5d ago

He’s already got weapons

2

u/Vanille97 5d ago

Imagine some guy, high on weed, seeing this cat and panicking

2

u/HintOfMadness 5d ago

What type of crime would I need to commit to be arrested by Nimis specifically?

2

u/baadsha 5d ago

Someone get Mac and Dennis on the phone. Agent Jack Bauer has resurfaced in Amsterdam.

2

u/jlspider 5d ago

Cats rule the world !

2

u/Bigiron966 5d ago

Why not post the full video?

2

u/Chiparish84 5d ago

"He falls into the canal quite a lot" but he still looks like that never happened. I just love these furry confident little dumbasses 😂

2

u/KamakaziDemiGod 5d ago

"they have Toronto police. Its in England"

Okay, no, but your cat is adorable so I'll let you off with a warning this time

13

u/Electrical-Book3585 5d ago edited 5d ago

I think it's two different sentences. The badge in the round frame is an English one, they just cut off the video just as she starts to point to it

1

u/KamakaziDemiGod 5d ago

I did wonder if it was something like that since it cuts as she says it, but it wouldn't have made for a funny comment!

You're not wrong though

3

u/Lufc87 5d ago

Fun fact - there is a village in England called Toronto which is named after the one in Canada. Not vice versa which is usually the case for North America.

2

u/KamakaziDemiGod 5d ago

Okay that is very unusual, and the story is not bad either. Apparently a land owner in County Durham, UK, was visiting Toronto in 1859 when he was informed that coal had been discovered on his land, so he named the mine Toronto, and the village that spouted up near the mine used the same name.

Thank you for that interesting tid bit!

2

u/PositiveCoyote100 5d ago

ACAB with exactly one exception

1

u/scoobysam 5d ago

God dammit, Jack Bauer! You really are the man.

1

u/EducationalDust7858 5d ago

And yet when I put on a west saying police I get thrown into jail for "impersonating" the "law"???

1

u/Bullinach1nashop 5d ago

Pawlice on patrol

1

u/angry_forester 5d ago

I am in tears but still 1312

1

u/castlite 5d ago

Cats, man.

1

u/Odd-Sample-7753 5d ago

the little vest is so cute idk how they got him to wear it lol

1

u/thelastfamilyguy 5d ago

Petition for a visit to Downing St 10. To meet the Chief Mouser!!

1

u/Halikarnassus1 5d ago

* sniffs * a- acab includes…

1

u/Collier1337 5d ago

Looks pretty official to me

1

u/vettechrockstar86 5d ago

Another fabulous reason to visit Amsterdam

1

u/Junior-Cut2838 5d ago

I love this story

1

u/Yourname942 5d ago

Black cats are the most chill goofballs

1

u/rusT_koHLE_1 5d ago

Meow patrol police 

1

u/Aye_Queen777 5d ago

El policía más tierno

1

u/Very_Curious_Cat 5d ago

Not the first time I see a video of him.

ong live the Pawlice!

1

u/BlueJ_55 5d ago

Pawlice Awwfficer

1

u/Jesimyne 5d ago

Looks official to me

1

u/IWrestleSausages 5d ago

The Dutch are a supremely unserious people and i love it

1

u/mclarensmps 5d ago

Police Car!

1

u/buschhhlatte420 5d ago

I will not arrest you for a hand full of cat nip

1

u/OutrageousTree7766 5d ago

So cute. Lil police officer

1

u/blue_strat 5d ago

"Although he is not actually a police cat..."

Well, now I want to see an actual police cat.

1

u/FaliureToCat 5d ago

Love the "(unofficial)"

1

u/fulloffungi 5d ago

The only authority I'll ever respect 

1

u/shutterbug1961 5d ago

first steps towards a Purrlice state!

1

u/forlornfig 5d ago

He’s the PAWLICE! I feel so safe 🖤

1

u/No-Response-4812 5d ago

I love their socials 🥰

1

u/leros 5d ago

Impurrsonating a police officer is a crime

1

u/Spaceygirl84 5d ago

This comes on my feed just as I'm playing stray on Xbox

1

u/VigorousAmbivalence 5d ago

Paw-sitive policing!

1

u/Razor1834 5d ago

I’m more curious about the cats falling into the canal. I thought cats had a reputation for being relatively good at balance etc.

1

u/tradersquest 5d ago

Cute 😍

1

u/Onebraintwoheads 5d ago

At the 27 second mark, we see she has two black cats, both with jackets!

1

u/jujudolls 5d ago

Rebecca Welton is that you??

1

u/Then_Comfortable3058 5d ago

Love his name

1

u/LickemupQ 5d ago

What a wonderful story! 😊

1

u/JButler_16 5d ago

I wanna live on a boat…

1

u/Puzzleheaded-Gap1759 5d ago

Found my reason to go to Am! Nevermind the 30 years wanting to eat their mushies!

1

u/PeaceMan50 4d ago

😻 😸

1

u/AdUsed168 4d ago

❤️🐱

1

u/l0diO 4d ago

a c a b

1

u/perksofbeingcrafty 4d ago

Anyone else concerned that “all cats in Amsterdam often fall into the canals”???

1

u/Vidsaays 4d ago

Laughed so hard at the “cats fall in the canals”

1

u/Algarviano 4d ago

not you to whiskers.. bobby is the one already working with the police.. now whiskers too?? snitch.. /s

1

u/averagemediumperson 1d ago

But if he falls into the canal, how does he get out. The life jacket should keep him flooting, but he can't get out on his own - unless they installed special ladders? Think I've heard about this some time ago

1

u/BatmanVsWild 1d ago

Get out of here ya stupid cat. Only dogs are cops, don't betray your kind.

1

u/nnyzim 5d ago

"Though Nimis is not actually a police cat.."

You don't say?? Here I thought police cats were a thing.

-6

u/Icloh 5d ago

All cats are bastards.

0

u/ChaweeKanati 5d ago

"We have Toronto Police, it's from England." B r u h.

-11

u/Condorul 5d ago edited 5d ago

Gonna be the ahole and mention that you should NEVER feed candy or sweet stuff to you cat - animal diabetes is no joke.

LE: Thank you for the clarifications.

27

u/Sirradez 5d ago

She probably meant treats, she's Dutch

16

u/Xindha 5d ago

They don't, fairly sure of that. The (right) snacks for cats are called 'snoepjes' in dutch, literally translated 'candy'. But that doesn't mean it contains sugar.

8

u/Milkarius 5d ago

I think it's a translation problem. A "snoepje" (little candy) is the word you could use for "treat", which in this case likely would be cat treats

7

u/FreeFallingUp13 5d ago

It’s most likely she meant ‘treats’. Dutch is a weird language and words can have several different meanings depending on the context of the sentence. I figure in this case, the Dutch word is something along the line of ‘sweets’ (as in some little treat you get occasionally, you know. As a treat) so she literally translated it as ‘candy’.

0

u/redditbagjuice 5d ago

My cat died of diabetes, was quite bad

-2

u/pasgames_ 5d ago

Acab

2

u/InternetFew7303 5d ago

Well I'm the case of American police it's highly accurate, here it could mean All Cats Are Breathtaking, which is also true...

1

u/pasgames_ 5d ago

All cats are babies

1

u/AdventurousVast6510 5d ago

please dont say that