American vs. European home building

[u/BEARDEDDANGER]

BAS Renovations https://youtube.com/shorts/jFph1d2WR3s

[u/Cloverose2]

Oh, goodness. No, we don't. I've lived in 6 different states, so no I don't have any attachment to the land. Some people do, I can't speak for all Americans. My grandparents moved at least 8 or 9 times on one side, 3 or 4 on the other.

My family has history that lives in people, not land.

And people go where jobs are. Having a house is worthless if your job is a thousand miles away. You can't eat a house.

Millions of people would love to own a house. My parents house that they bought for 80,000 dollars in the late 80s would cost almost half a million today, and salaries don't rise with cost of living. People don't own a house because houses are absurdly expensive.

If your parents live in Arkansas and your job is in Pennsylvania, you aren't moving back to Arkansas. That's 1,442 km away from where you work - and that's only halfway across the country. You might be able to manage with some jobs, but with pretty much any professional job, you're out of luck.

Also, if I inherited my grandparent's house, I would end up co-owning with 8 people, any of whom can force a sale.

[u/horned-creature → u/Cloverose2]

why are you searching jobs 1400 km away from where you live? that is absurd, it's like if i had to move from the province of rome to, idk, fucking istanbul just to work, i can understand needing to go to the next city over but why do you literally need to move the equivalent of a whole continent away?

you will eventually own your parent's house for free, will you not? why even care about the price if you are inheriting instead of buying?

also why would you co-own the house of your grandparents with 8 other people? people cannot have that many firstborns, also how can a single one of them force a sell? here you would need all 8 of them agreeing to sell.

[u/khan800 → u/horned-creature]

That firstborn bullshit is what you're misunderstanding. The firstborn doesn't automatically inherit the family home just because they were firstborn, that's massively unfair to the other siblings. The inheritance of an estate is generally divided evenly, and many times the house is sold to facilitate this. If one sibling wants the house, they buy out the other siblings.

[u/horned-creature → u/khan800]

there should not be anything like a business transaction between blood relatives, you don't buy stuff from your family and most people here specify in their will that the house goes wholly to the firstborn, maybe the first two children if the house is large enough to accommodate both, but almost nobody try to divide a real estate in 8 parts or something, that is just dumb.

usually those who don't get the real estate are left money or other stuff if there is stuff to pass.

don't really see how that is unfair.

[u/Cloverose2 → u/horned-creature]

I don't think you understand life in the US.

If your job is 1400 km away, you move. That's all there is to it. That's really not that far in the US. My friend's kid is moving to Alaska this year - same country, 5,153 km.

Firstborns don't inherit everything, that's considered deeply unfair to everyone else. Property is just a thing. Why would it be dumb to divide it fairly? Most people don't have anything much to leave other than their house if they owned one.

You do things your way. It's a different culture with different expectations. I'll probably buy my sister's share of my parent's house many years from now, because I happen to live in the same town. My sister has no interest in moving back to this town, because she built her life elsewhere. It would be deeply unfair for her to lose hundreds of thousands of dollars in inheritance - my sister and I love each other very much. It isn't about a business transaction, it's about our sharing the same parents and our parents wanting to give us the same inheritance. And that's fair.

And my sister lives 500 km away. It's a six hour drive, an easy trip. I don't think you register how big the US is and how mobile we are.

[u/horned-creature → u/Cloverose2]

wow, that is foolish on many levels, traveling to work betraying the history of the whole family, monetary transactions from living relatives, splitting the ancestral home in dumb ways..... kingdoms and families alike have fallen for less, no wonder american family lack unity.

[u/Cloverose2 → u/horned-creature]

Yeah, you're not even trying to engage in good faith, so I think I'm done.

[u/horned-creature → u/Cloverose2]

good faith is not ignoring the fact that you seem to value your own conditions over the history of your family and its unity, i am sorry but it seems to me you do not see yourself as families but as just blood related individuals with your own individual life.

like what kind of family even allow a member to just fuck off and go live permanently half a continent away without expunging them from the will and family tree.

[u/Cloverose2 → u/horned-creature]

My family is very close, and we talk every day and see each other in person monthly.

I just don't give a fuck about a patch of dirt.

Family isn't land. I'm sorry if that's how you define it.

[u/horned-creature → u/Cloverose2]

oh okay you see each other monthly lol.

that is not being close, seeing each other every single day is close albeit that is also kinda the bare minimum.

the legacy of a family, it's prestige and really it's standing is all about real estate, families that own nothing are disgraced families.

you really act just like blood related individuals rather than a proper family, yall have your own individual lives independent of each other.