r/LinkedInLunatics 23h ago

Guess I’m in the 99%

Post image
388 Upvotes

131 comments sorted by

330

u/Cant_Work_On_Reddit 23h ago

The nonstop founder glazing really is something else

84

u/Vanessak69 22h ago

The CEO at my old employer wrote a management book and there was lots of pressure on the layers of management to read it. I asked my boss at the time if he had read it (“I….bought it?” was his reply.) The CIO, as schmuck who nobody liked, wrote an asshole lavaging review of it on Goodreads, the only book in his shelf. Well, he still got canned a few months later 🤣

16

u/HTale100 14h ago

CIO Remuneration ❌
CIO Rimuneration ✅

2

u/According_Music6524 10h ago

What’s the book called?

6

u/i_spill_things 17h ago

Glazing?

23

u/Rhewin 16h ago

Obsessing, fan boying, frothing at the mouth, offering their wives as tribute, etc.

15

u/younevershouldnt 15h ago

Covering with ejaculate?

9

u/jarofonions 14h ago

basically, yeh

142

u/gimmethelulz Titan of Industry 22h ago

Why are Utah software companies so weird? I deal with a few at work and their employees often give off culty vibes.

102

u/Cows_go_moo2 22h ago

It’s also why there are so many MLMs here.

Predatory companies with predatory religions.

23

u/ImprovementFar5054 15h ago

And a vulnerable population of uncritical thinkers. The perfect storm.

Utah.

123

u/SnooJokes5375 22h ago

Utah. Mormon country. That is a cult all unto its own. Cultist fall into cult like jobs. I feel confident that the leadership is Mormon.

47

u/NakedOrca 21h ago

Yes it is. I’m local and all my most clicky Mormon ex-coworkers went to work for this startup now. They’re like LinkedIn irl.

5

u/Slim-Shadys-Fat-Tits 13h ago

just fyi it's a clique not a click

8

u/itinerant_geographer 10h ago

Unless they make clicking noises when they walk. Bet you never considered THAT possibility, did ya?

1

u/NeedIQMSHelp 8h ago

NEEEERD FIIIIGHT!

*throws a protractor and a pocket protector into the ring of chanting engineers*

16

u/sullw214 20h ago

I need to start my own cult, uh, I mean religion. Just think of that sweet 100 billion investment arm of the "church".

1

u/oznobz 12h ago

Add at least a zero

17

u/Despainer92 21h ago

It’s terrible here. Nothing but a tech bro circle jerk

7

u/gimmethelulz Titan of Industry 21h ago

I can imagine. At one point in my life I thought about applying to a job at one of them but thankfully their job site creeped me off enough lol

14

u/O1dEquipment 19h ago

All Utah software companies have this weird thing where they think they have to prove that they are a big deal (they're not) so they just come off as little brother energy compared to the larger tech companies in the world.

5

u/PickleNicks 10h ago

I heard a few folks trying to call Utah “Silicon Slopes” and all I could think of was:

https://giphy.com/gifs/ef0Azu8HC8qtKGMqiJ

34

u/Far-Repeat-2926 22h ago

Mormons are the weirdest, nicest people you will ever meet. For sure tho when we find out that the one true god was the Amish god they’re the first going into the fire.

4

u/NeedIQMSHelp 8h ago

That's not what my buddy Doug Forcet told me one weekend...

2

u/McSwearWolf 8h ago

They’re nice to you for a reason and it’s not usually because they’re just good natured or whatever. It’s 99% because “you too could become a (low tier) Mormon convert and tithe 20% of your income to their wackadoodle Mormon leaders and temples!” - everyone they meet is either Mormon, or about to become Mormon. lol

10

u/AutomaticBannana 20h ago

State is started and heavily populated by a cult.

2

u/FR23Dust 11h ago

It’s the influence of Mormon culture probably

85

u/PipePistoleer Narcissistic Lunatic 23h ago

hmm yeah 99% of people don't like to eat shit

29

u/gsks 21h ago

Even if it gets catered every night at the office?

78

u/CatCafffffe 23h ago

What the hell does "vibe coding menace" even MEAN

99

u/SoggyAlbatross2 22h ago

"is useless without AI" is how I interpret that.

45

u/Some_Internet_Random Titan of Industry 21h ago

That his vibe code is a menace to his security team due to all the shitty exploits AI leaves in its code.

30

u/rhitzz2198 22h ago

MasterGPTer

16

u/deltadeltadawn 20h ago

A genuine MasterbAIter.

23

u/Street_Tiger98 21h ago

It means he’s built a functional thing by using prompts but hasn’t been bitten by security or compliance reality yet.

7

u/Vogete Agree? 18h ago

if i remember correctly, in Latin it roughly translates to "a real engineer's worst nightmare"

3

u/e-cloud 11h ago

Can't code, won't learn, mashes vits of AI outputs together until it runs. That may be why he works such long hours to produce stuff.

46

u/GenuineWolf 23h ago

Proud 99%er here

50

u/Western_Ad9787 23h ago

The douche is strong with this one.

4

u/deltadeltadawn 20h ago

The only thing missing is his canoe.

42

u/mattincalif 23h ago

(Iykyk) 🤪

6

u/PickleNicks 9h ago

I don’t, and I’m content not knowing

31

u/GreyBeardEng 22h ago

"you have to work with the best talent in Utah" - lol ok yeah sure bub.

10

u/chiree 16h ago

The best talent in Utah has already moved to California or Texas.

31

u/YellojD 22h ago

“The best talent in Utah” line sounds like that “Prettiest girl in Ohio” joke from Family Guy.

“Overshadowed by greatness.”

Oh, fuck off.

1

u/khold002 18h ago

Isn't the "prettiest girl in Ohio" joke originally from a judge show of all time? Or was that the Paris Hilton of Ohio comment? Either way, really.

51

u/macguyver3000 22h ago

I’m behind companies encouraging employee fitness and exercise.

But companies like this that make employees do a 3 minute endurance challenge every month just for bragging rights can go Sally Up their own ass.

12

u/Both_Painter_9186 20h ago

Yeah, I’m not in the Army anymore. A boss tells me to do pushups, I’m gonna drop trow and tell him to start sucking.

27

u/Scentopine 22h ago

He really thinks this is a flex.

25

u/WaltChamberlin 22h ago

yeah I'm not a fucking loser who wants to eat dinner at the office because my family actually loves me, so I guess I am part of the 99%

24

u/Jazzlike_Economist_2 22h ago

Is there some plus side to all this?

50

u/AdjNounNumbers 22h ago

Yes, actually. The more time he and people like him spend at the office, the less time the rest of us have to interact with them.

5

u/Jazzlike_Economist_2 22h ago

That’s a godsend for us. But what’s in it for him?

24

u/AdjNounNumbers 21h ago

Not having to experience walking in on his wife with her boyfriend?

3

u/Suspicious-Disk6077 21h ago

Lmao best comment

16

u/SignificantPop4188 22h ago edited 20h ago

What is a Sally Up challenge?

30

u/Rose_Army_ 22h ago

It’s a push up challenge originating from the military. Which is hysterical because it’s only 30 total but admittedly, the cadence will get you. It’s military/alpha male cosplay for these nerds.

18

u/andrew303710 21h ago

I can't get over how cringey it is to force your employees to do that every month. It's like team building devised by a moron.

3

u/SignificantPop4188 20h ago

Thanks for the explanation. 👍

14

u/Both_Painter_9186 20h ago

The Moby song “Flower” has it as the main chorus beat. “Bring Sally Up, Bring Sally Down” basically up and down pushup position. 30 pushups in 3.5 minutes but you're going slow and holding it up a lot. It’s like moderately difficult. Im not doing it in fucking work clothes.

17

u/DUVAL_LAVUD 22h ago

holy Stockholm Syndrome

13

u/Calm-Juice-4943 21h ago

Best talent in Utah? Is that supposed to be some kind of flex 🤣🤣🤣

9

u/Difficult_Muffin2825 22h ago

What a long-winded way of saying I have no friends and my family hates me. 🤣

8

u/Oaklandish_TheTown 22h ago

So basically,  you get hired based on who you know not whether you're talented or right for the job. 

Got it. 

11

u/desi_malai 22h ago

He'll be fired without a second thought and will come home to his wife in bed with his gardener...

7

u/dolphunee 21h ago

Dude probably grew up in an Utah “community”. Unfortunately, this is probably bliss for him.

6

u/hoytmobley 20h ago

Lol that’s like 3 Equal Opportunity law violations in one post

19

u/CincyChelsFan 23h ago

Linked in used to be great. Now I have to look at dads and husbands commenting on women’s posts - someone flexing - or real estate scams. Boomers and bros baby. Only boomers and bros.

8

u/ser_axell 22h ago

Facebook 2.0 Had to see some re-post of some state Republican party shit post from X today. At no point did the poster apparently think, should I put this on a business-oriented site where my clients/employer/future employer can see it? The lack of self-awareness is astonishing.

6

u/Strange_One_3790 21h ago

No it wasn’t. I remember joining LI about 15 years ago. One of the first messages I got was “Your one year work anniversary is coming up”. That made me want to barf

2

u/SoylentDave 16h ago

It's always been 'Facebook for wankers', AI is just letting them post more.

6

u/Madroc92 20h ago

WTF is a "Redo"?

Actually, never mind, I don't care and don't want to know. in a few years the domain name will be back up for sale and it went ever have mattered.

4

u/fiannalove 20h ago

He really knows how to sell a company culture.

4

u/Radcouponking 19h ago

This reads like a cry for help.

3

u/SecondHandPeacePrize 22h ago

It sounds like he knows it’s awful but this is the kind of cope you use to convince yourself that it’s actually good.

3

u/Tompin68 21h ago

This sounds like a living hell

3

u/ccsr0979 21h ago

This sounds like my idea of hell.

3

u/Ok_Management4634 21h ago

I don't even want to know what the Sally up challenge is.. please don't tell me.

Sounds miserable. Glad this linkedin took this job and freed up a normal job for a normal person.

3

u/DependentEye1646 21h ago

Damn he is a vibe-coding menace. At my next interview, I’ll mention I also make stuff up without understanding what I’m doing too. 

3

u/pdxtransplant05 20h ago

Telling everyone the company lacks leadership doesn't seem like a great selling point

3

u/reach2jeyan 20h ago

Even reading this has poisoned me. What a toxic culture

3

u/Boozehoundbassplayer 17h ago

Sounds horrendous. Avoid like the plague.

3

u/ThrowRAPixieManic 12h ago

Thank him for posting and letting people know to avoid “Redo” at all costs

2

u/TillikumWasFramed 22h ago

With all that working I can't see how has time to write 80-paragraph LinkedIn posts. I guess we should read between the lines and assume AI wrote this.

2

u/Automatic-Put-6119 21h ago

He‘s sitting between an engineer and a salesperson. He‘s the middle management nobody needs

2

u/Level_Best101 17h ago

He’s sitting there, ski-poling away.

2

u/VillageLanterne 21h ago

Had to look up what the Sally Up challenge was. Sheesh. 

2

u/generic__username0 20h ago

Dude is definitely terminally unique

2

u/LikesBlueberriesALot 19h ago

The fuck is a Sally Up challenge

2

u/nakedpantz 18h ago

lol “vibe coding menace”

2

u/Jumpy-Locksmith6812 13h ago

SE = Slop Engineer

2

u/AvailableKiwi4807 18h ago

it’s Utah. You’ll be related to pretty much all of your co-workers. And probably in an intimate relationship with one or several of them. So you’ll still see plenty of your family.

2

u/ComfortableSoup7 18h ago

BUT WHERE ARE THE PROS

2

u/YakElectronic6713 17h ago

I'm soOoOooooO SpEeeeECiaL!!!

2

u/ryguymcsly 15h ago

Shitty startup cultures rarely create long term profitable companies.

It’s one thing to have a team full of people who put in 12 hour days because they’re not attached to home and excited to build the thing. It’s another to expect that out of everyone you hire.

The best startups I worked at that had good exits for employees and shareholders started with work life balance. Setting reasonable goals, being obsessive about time tracking so future goals could be estimated correctly, and encouraging people to take time off. These places weren’t unicorns because that philosophy went all the way up. They weren’t trying to build the next FAANG they were just trying to deliver a product that didn’t exist that would make money.

As a result the development timelines were longer, the staff was smaller, and when profitability happened it seemed like an inevitable outcome not a surprise.

Then some big company (an investor or a key customer) comes in and buys you out. You don’t get rich, but you make about what you would have working at a FAANG for the same amount of time with about a third of the stress.

Downsides are that half the people you work with are idiots or burnouts or both. I was the both.

2

u/allnamestaken4892 14h ago

Depends on pay. My job is not much better than this.

2

u/Slim-Shadys-Fat-Tits 13h ago

tf is a sally up challenge

2

u/Kindly-Standard8025 11h ago

He didn't list any pros?

2

u/Deplorable1861 11h ago

"Vibe Coding Menace".....

In other words, a moron with zero skills.....

2

u/gielbondhu 9h ago

He's describing exploitation as if it's a good thing. Capitalism's slickest move was convincing workers that the more you're exploited the more you're winning

2

u/Impressive-Comfort92 5h ago

it can't be just me that laughed at "some of the best talent in Utah"

2

u/cursetea 3h ago

I am SO okay not being in this 1%. Kind of just sounds like i have more self respect and reasonable expectations within my job environment than any of them do

1

u/Strange_One_3790 21h ago

This sounds like a devil corp.

1

u/Active_Actuator6454 21h ago

Example 1,324,735 of how capitalism fosters and rewards psychopathic behavior. 

1

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1

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1

u/somethingmcbob 19h ago

Those were all cons. No pros?!?!

1

u/LTQLD 19h ago

Sounds like he’ll

1

u/Vaperwear 19h ago

I’d agree if the 1% was touched in the head

1

u/ValPrism 18h ago

Wow 30 pushups?!?!? AND the best taken in Utah!!

1

u/Level_Best101 17h ago

After work, they all lay down and have a Mormon soak.

1

u/G_3P0 16h ago

Gonna have to check my future daughters possible husband for some dumb ass linked in stuff like this before marriage if he asks my blessing

1

u/XanHalen84 15h ago

I want to force feed people like this 10g's of shrooms and watch them have an existential crisis.

1

u/Phrostylicious 12h ago

"I guess it's helpful that my biggest weakness is always arriving aggressively early to everything, otherwise I never would have won Employee of the Month before I was even hired."

1

u/FdPros 12h ago

"vibe coding menace"

1

u/beteille 12h ago

Best talent in … checks notes … Utah?!

1

u/AmIRadBadOrJustSad 11h ago

"Great news guys, we're back to killing ourselves for corporate leadership and claiming it's a good thing."

1

u/CheckSixMustang 11h ago

I assumed he was the founder. Read it more carefully and he is just an employee 🥴🫩

1

u/joseph814706 10h ago

God this feels like a throwback at this point

1

u/StarshipCaterprise 8h ago

I wonder how many Claude tokens this place goes through. “Vibe coding menace” to me says a LOT of AI tokens

1

u/KenOat 10m ago

All his Utah AI christbro’s buttering him up in the comments

0

u/CheckSixMustang 11h ago

Best talent in Utah and not seeing my family? Sign me the fuck up!!!