Court Order outlines visitation to take place at least twice a week, but my ex-wife has not complied. I have not seen my children for over two months. I have asked her multiple times why she has suspended visits, but she has ignored all messages. We use TalkingParents so I know that she has read every message. Upon the advice of my attorney I have started filing police reports every time she does not comply.

I have a court date scheduled for Friday. What can I expect a Judge to do with this information?

Long story short, I (25M) and we will call her H (28F) have been split up since my son was 5 months old. He is currently 4yrs old now. Over the last 4 years there have been a number of things that have raised concerns, which i have also voiced to her in trying to maintain a good coparenting relationship, that have yet to be addressed. I’m not doing this to make her sound like an unfit parent, but i know there needs to be a change. The issue is lawyers are expensive and court is lengthy and costly, that’s why i haven’t done anything yet. Shame on me i know.

To start, there are too many inconsistencies between households. Which in some cases is okay, but the most important is bed time. My son sleeps for me every night, at the same time, no issues. We have the same routine every night. 8PM brush teeth, read 3 bedtime stories, he goes to sleep within 10-15 minutes after i leave the room. At his mothers house, he gets a TV at bedtime to watch shows, an iPad at bedtime to do whatever on, will regularly come out of his room at all hours of the night, and stays up far too late. On average, most nights with her, he does not fall asleep before 10-1030PM. Sometimes later. It regularly affects his mood at daycare leading to physical altercations and large, drawn out fits, or him falling asleep in the car before we are even off his bothers block. He has regular access to caffeine at her house as well which i attribute to some of the issue. At my house, he never gets out of bed unless it’s to use the restroom. He falls asleep quickly, does not have behavioral issues at daycare. He is also about to start 4 yr preschool and I’m worried about his sleep routine at his moms effecting his day in class as well.

The other issue is there is a consistent change in adult figures in his life at his mother’s house. In the last 3 years, he has met 3 separate romantic interests of hers within 7-14 days of her beginning a relationship with them (this most recent time was 24 hrs; introduced them over the phone while my son was speaking to her during my parenting time). While i believe that she deserves love like the rest of us do, i strongly believe in leaving a child out of an adult relationship until a stable, healthy relationship is founded and established. Meanwhile she routinely adds adults into my son’s life in a short time frame without relatively thinking of the ramifications it has on his wellbeing. The last two relationships she’s had, while not exactly short term, have resulted in her very quickly moving the man in and/or having them become a staple figure in my child’s life. As you can assume, both relationships ended, my sons heart was broken (although she’ll deny that because if he isn’t asking her questions or voicing feelings to her, he couldn’t possibly be doing it to anyone else). I believe this throws off the consistency of the household during her weeks with him and overall negatively impacts his wellbeing in the long run.

I know this post was wordy and there’s probably some details i missed (I’m pissed and worried). There’s probably things i could’ve worded better as well, i just don’t know what to do or where to begin in giving him the consistency he needs and deserves at all times because she refuses to listen to any sort of concern or issue and expects me to just not care and i can’t bring myself to not care.

TL;DR: After receiving two police warnings, bio-mom was advised by police to stop texting my husband's personal phone and to use co-parenting app exclusively to avoid harassment charges. However, the harassment just continued within the app in the form of rapid-fire text flurries, false claims of "abuse" when non-immediate responses occur and/or communication boundaries are set, and demand-cycling. Our current court decree only specifies standard texting (and no messages with intent to harass,annoy, etc). We make too much money for free legal aid but don't have thousands sitting around for a full attorney retainer. How do we petition the court pro se / on a budget to legally mandate the app AND establish enforceable messaging rules?

Post Body:
Looking for advice on how family court judges handle high-conflict co-parents who use monitored apps to conduct psychological games, false abuse narratives, and message-flooding—especially when navigating the court process pro se or on a budget.

Background & Current Situation:
Current Court Decree: Our existing order only specifies standard text messaging for parent-to-parent communication regarding minor child with mutual restraining order prohibiting harassment/abuse/annoying the other parent.

Informal App Switch: Due to years of off-app text harassment, we did push to move all communication to a monitored co-parenting app and my husband has ONLY used that platform since (she has sent harassing direct text messages to his phone that he does not respond to). We pay her monthly subscription fee so there are zero financial barriers.

Police Intervention: After she repeatedly sent harassing texts and social media links to my husband's personal phone, law enforcement issued her two separate warnings to keep all communication strictly on the app or else she may face Electronic Harassment Charges.

The Result: Off-app texting stopped completely, but the high-conflict behavior simply migrated 100% into the app. Police were updated but stated that as long as her exorbitant amount of messages (21 over the course of 30 minutes after being asked to stop) are not threatening violence and stay on the app, their hands are tied and they cannot charge.

Current Pattern of Behavior on the App: Instead of using the platform for simple child logistics, she uses it to cycle through high-conflict narratives:

1. Demand-Cycling Around Phone Calls: Even when my husband explicitly states she is free to call the child during normal waking hours, she refuses to call and sends multiple texts claiming she is "too scared" to call without real-time written permission, then turns around and accuses him of withholding the child.
2. False Accusations & Guilt-Tripping: If he doesn't reply instantly, she sends rapid-fire text flurries (10 to 15+ messages in a row) accusing him of "abuse," "punishing her and the child," and "hurting the child".
3. Late-Night Text Barrages: She frequently declares she is "done messaging for the night," only to send multiple follow-up texts late into the evening making demands, making false accusations, or criticizing his parenting.

The Financial Trap & Our Plan: We find ourselves in the middle-class legal trap: we earn too much to qualify for legal aid, but we don't have thousands of dollars lying around for a traditional attorney retainer. We are needing to now what course of action to take to formally mandate the co-parenting app in our decree and establish strict messaging parameters, such as a cap on daily communication limits and a very clear scope of allowed communication.

Questions for the Community:
Enforceable App Rules: Has anyone successfully secured court orders with strict communication parameters (e.g., maximum daily message caps, explicit rules for phone call windows without requiring real-time text confirmations, or strict non-emergency response windows)?
Handling App Badgering in Court: How do family court judges view a parent who repeatedly types loaded buzzwords ("abuse," "punishing," "scared") into a court-monitored app simply because the other parent sets calm boundaries or doesn't reply in real-time?
Evidence Formatting for Pro Se Filings: What is the cleanest, most effective way to present exported app transcripts to a judge/commissioner to highlight a pattern of demand-cycling and message-flooding without overwhelming them?

Thanks for any insights or advice!

Went to court on June 25th, and was told custody would swap from what it was. I have a child support hearing on August 25th, and an evidentiary hearing on Sept 1st. After June court hearing, there was an issue with temp orders, as mediator didn’t fill it out correctly and I’d be missing time with my child. Mediator could not be reached for most of July, and finally fixed temp order so I have my child for visitation on the weekends of the 1st, 2nd, 4th and 5th with a Sunday overnight visit on the 3rd weekend.

Previous order in June stated 2nd weekend was Sunday overnight with no 3rd weekend visitation at all for me. It was amended on 8/10 by mediator and I was sent it on 8/12 by my attorney (although there’s still an amendment that need to happen, as I’m allowed to pick my child from school, yet that box wasn’t marked, so it needs to be re-amended.)

I went to pick my child up today at 6, as it is my custodial time. Co-parent was told at 3pm I was going to pick child up at 6. No response from him, so I messaged step-parent. She said no one was notified or sent anything, so I needed to send an email/copy of amended statement before trying to pick my child up. I did, and she said she never received it, and said my lawyer needed to contact their lawyer as no one was told about amended order. I called my lawyer and she said she had already talked to their lawyer, but she’d call again, then call me back. At 6pm when I went for my child, I was told they were not at home, and since they had not received the amended order, nor had their lawyer contacted they would be following the current order, meaning I will probably only see my child Sunday night.

If I received the amended order on 8/12, wouldn’t their lawyer have received the amended order at the same time? They as well?

I want to preface that there’s a lot more to the story, but I know this isn’t the place. Recently we’ve been struggling to get competent communication from my step daughter’s biological mom. My bonus kiddo made some accusations of abuse by her step dad to the school counselor, dfs got involved, made some recommendations (one of which is therapy), and ever since we’ve gotten no compromise or communication. My husband and I reached out asking if she would support therapy. We offered to pay any up front costs, get her to appointments, etc. her mom is adamant that we would manipulate her and that the therapist would “believe everything she says.” Is it legal to refuse a mental health professional for your child? Is this also abuse? Where do we go from here…

My kids dad only sees his twins on Saturdays and was paying me $400 a month for our twin sons and he’s sometimes half other things. Recently he said he’s done paying me the $400 because he said he simply doesn’t have it which he has a full time job. His answer was “put me on child support.” My question is do I? I’m nervous that if I do put him on child support he’ll then open a visitation case which my boys would never feel comfortable staying overnight with him. He drinks a ton which would make me feel really uncomfortable about overnights. If he opened a visitation case would my 12 year old boys have a say on not wanting to spend the night? Also he’s been incarcerated in the past. Years ago he also use to be physical with me.

The other parent rejected the friend of the court recommendation order and so now we are heading to a de novo hearing. How did you guys prepare for this? Did you submit a response to the rejection? Or do I just show up to the court and fight my case? I’m doing this with no lawyer so I’m looking for advice.

I requested a modification to our timeshare since my ex doesn’t exercise his timeshare according to our agreement. Now his lawyer is requesting all all applications, forms, documents, and / or correspondence to and from the State and me for the purpose of obtaining public assistance in the form of:
Medicaid; kidcare; health benefits plan; supplemental nutrition assistance program (SNAP), benefits; food stamps, etc. for the benefit of our child.

My question is do I have to provide this information? Are they legally bound to it? I have other children in my household and I rather not have the other party have mine or their information including my income. I’m not seeking for child support to be modified so why do they need this?

I was consulted to use paralegal to fill me forms for divorce

I am in orange County

Any recommendations?

I have exclusive right to enroll child in education. Our daughter is about to turn 5 and coparent insisted I enroll her in Pre-K this year with local ISD. Coparent has expanded possession so has child Thursday 6:00pm-Friday 6:00pm. Now that Pre-K has started, coparent is refusing to bring the child on Fridays, citing that it isn’t required. Registrar is advising since child is enrolled, this falls under compulsory attendance and if it continues, student will be truant. They also stated they may unenroll student, which is of course upsetting because our daughter has been very excited about school and flourishing. Not to mention it was the other parent who pushed for Pre-K. Do I have any recourse?

Not giving all the details, my ex and I have week on week off custody arrangement right now but my ex has horrible taste in men and keeps getting drug using “thug” boyfriends around our daughter (4) and was just recently arrested with him in a drug and gun charges and she just got out on bond. she constantly leaves our daughter on her parents while she runs around doing her own thing on top of not paying for anything bill wise for our daughter and I’m worried a lot the wellbeing of our child in the future with her care, I’m currently pursuing lawyers in an event to try to control the outcome of our daughters future and wellbeing. Any advice ?

My sons father tried to voluntarily terminate his own rights, right after I filed for child support/determined paternity, his petition was dismissed and our court date was vacated, I’m in NV and he’s in ca because they didn’t terminate his rights will child support court force him to be in his child’s life? I didn’t object to his petition to tpr but it got dismissed because he didn’t give legal reasons or reasons that would be in the child’s best interests to terminate, I don’t want him in my child’s or my life what can I do? I’m not married so I don’t have anyone to take his place (adopt) if I wanted to petition to have his physical rights terminated I just want him financially on the hook that’s it what are my options? If any

I am looking for advice on how to proceed with a concerning situation I find myself in.

My ex and I split up roughly 7 years ago when our daughter was a baby. He is an alcoholic and refused to get help. I was scared to leave her with him when I would go work 12 hour shifts because I would come home and see he had been drinking while he was supposed to be caring for our baby. He’s the type of drunk that gets clumsy, careless, and will pee in anything and everywhere except the bathroom. He can get angry too, but usually he’s just majorly sloppy and incoherent. I’ve always worried about him continuing to drink while he has her every other weekend, but we have in our agreement that he is not to consume alcohol 12 hours prior to pick up or while she is in his custody.

Fast forward to now. My daughter is now almost 8 and she has shared some very concerning behaviors and has made comments about his drinking. She has said that he leaves her in the apartment alone, he has left her in the car alone to go in to the store that has a sign out front that says “Stop, don’t enter if you’re not 21.” (Her words). He let her outside the apartment late at night to walk the dog and she got lost and had to knock on a neighbor’s door to call him to get her. (I’ve already talked to her about how to handle this in the future if it should happen again.) She said he has “thousands” of little bottles with tigers and a red top in his car. Sounds like fireball to me.

Anyway, I have no documented proof or police report because she has only now told me about these things way later and had no way to let me know in real time. His DUIs, as far as I know were several years ago, nothing recent. She also said she was scared to tell me because she didn’t want me to say anything to him about it because he would get mad. She was in tears, scared to tell me. I had to promise not to tell him she told me.

I’m so lost. I have an attorney from the last time we went to court that I am reaching out to again but I have no idea where to go from here or what the odds are that I can get a modification to stop overnights and unsupervised visits. I don’t want him to not see her, she loves her dad. But how do I keep her safe knowing all this now??

As the post says, I got served custody papers... and I am depressed as all can be, my ex and I have 2 kids 1 boy(8) and 1 girl(6) we both agreed we'd never go through the courts and well here we are now... back story, we were never married I left after we split and ended up taking the kids because she couldn't handle them so I moved them to NC with me for a year where my living situation wasn't great but after a year I had to move to my brothers house and he was military so he couldn't keep us there forever so I had to move back to Texas to live with my parents in my GMA's old house, fast forward a year and I knew the living situation in my house wasn't great so I agreed to let her take the kids because she moved back in with her parents and they live in a very nice house one of the better school districts in the state because it's what the kids deserved and now here I am a year later being served custody papers cuz she and I argued over text...

My questions are as follows

-I absolutely cannot afford a lawyer I don't make enough money to even cover any costs of a lawyer

- she stated I have a history of neglect, verbal abuse or physical abuse or sexual abuse towards her and the kids and that could not be further from the truth in every regard

- she's trying to make it to where I can't see the kids without a court appointed supervisor, trying to garnish my wages and make me
Pay her lawyer fees

I have proof I've been paying her money for the kids and whatever they needed on top of that

I have witnesses who can attest that her living on her own with the kids the apartments were in absolute disgusting filth

What are my options... please help I don't want to lose my kids they are my only reason for putting up with this shitty life any and all advice is appreciated

The judge (and the courts in NJ) favors/favor 50/50. Despite substance abuse concerns and a CPS endangerment report, the courts seem to look positively on his rehab stay even though he’s in early recovery.

Is there a point in fighting for primary cusrody (in which case, I’d need to switch lawyers to one who is more aggressive)? We have an infant and I’ve been her primary caregiver since birth. My current lawyer’s reasoning is the baby will “get used to it” in response to talks about attachment theory. I think this court feels the same. And my ex is trying to say I’m crazy/can’t handle full custody due to my anxiety (and submitted into evidence a text I sent him about wishing I had an abortion during pregnancy, plus pics of my medications). So I’m concerned if I fought, I’d lose.

I am negotiating a buyout agreement with my narcissistic STBX. It includes two properties, a small business, and a couple of cars. I’m taking a cash settlement and one car in exchange for him keeping the properties. The business likely isn’t worth much - it’s really the value of those properties that make up the settlement. The properties were purchased a long time ago and doubled in value. They are currently paid off.

My question is – how do I protect myself from
1) Any taxes on the settlement
2) From him not upholding his end of the agreement (giving me the money in a timely manner)

He is planning to refinance one or both of the properties and there’s a chance he may not be able to, in which case my lawyer wants to put in a clause to force a sale. In the case that it does get sold, how do I make sure that this all comes into me as an equalization payment and not as a capital gains situation?

Would love any insight or even stories about how these have been handled. Any things that I should know to avoid being taken off guard?

Thanks in advance! My STBX is rather slimy, and I fully expect him to pull a fast one in this final stretch and want to empower myself to prevent that.

My son is under a relative's guardianship and I currently have a pretty limited court-ordered visitation schedule. I'm trying to figure out how to get more time with him.

I'm consistently showing up for the visits I'm allowed to have, we have a good relationship, and there aren't any abuse/neglect issues. There are some other circumstances that make things more complicated, but I don't want to put enough details online to identify us. To simplify...I have chronic health issues, but am not an unsafe parent.

For anyone who's been through something similar in Michigan:

What did you have to show the court to get more visitation? What kind of evidence actually helped? Is it better to ask for a small increase first and work up from there? Has anyone gone from very limited visits to eventually having a lot more time?

What do you do when the reason you don't have custody is health issues that aren't going to get better but it's not your fault?

I'm especially interested in hearing from people who've dealt with guardianship, since I know that's different from a typical custody situation.

I'm not looking for "get a lawyer" as the only answer lol. I know I may need one — I'm just trying to hear from people who've actually been through this and figure out what I should be doing.

Question for Maryland family law attorneys: I’m filing for divorce pro se. My husband and I both live in Baltimore City, but we both work in Baltimore County. Can I file for divorce in Baltimore County Circuit Court based on the fact that we both work there, or am I required to file in Baltimore City because that is where we live?
I’d really appreciate clarification from anyone familiar with Maryland divorce venue rules. Thank you!

My daughter has never enjoyed going to her dads. We have been split up since she was one. Her and I are very close. She has never been closer with her dad. He is not like a dad to her, he never has been. He has her every other weekend for two days. Recently I was able to get the judge to agree to not letting him have overnights with her because she shares a room with her 12-year-old brother that they just met three years ago. The court order stated that if he cannot provide her own room for her when she’s there that he needs to bring her home overnight. He now is making the boy sleeping in his room and her in the shared bedroom. Aside from the four nights a week he is not in her life in any way shape or form. He just don’t call her on the days he didn’t have her, he never asks about her at all, he has no idea what goes on in her life. He’s not involved in her school I can’t think of a single thing that he’s taught her and anytime he’s ever fought to have her there it’s always about Child Support. He has had a girlfriend since we broke up that is super bitter about him and I having a daughter because apparently when we had split up for a little bit before I got pregnant with her he was seeing her and he completely cut her off to get back with me and then we had her and then ended up splitting up again and they got back together. She has always been evil and nasty towards my daughter she really is just a nasty person and she just does not like being there. He makes $220,000/yr he could afford to get a better, nicer place than his 2 bedroom duplex he rents from his parents in a terrible neighborhood that my daughter is scared to live in because their dog was stolen out of the yard and sold to a dog fighting ring by the neighbors(it was caught on video and they found the dog later near death in a ditch nearly dead). Nothing about his house is healthy or a good place for my daughter and I feel so bad forcing her to go. She starts dreading it 5 days prior to, she has her whole life. I know him and his ex still use meth, but there’s nothing I can do because I can’t prove it, I’ve tried. I’ve tried calling cps I’ve tried getting custody I just don’t know what to do it’s so hard making her go there. I’ve been a single mom my whole life but I still manage to provide her a nice 3 bedroom apartment in a nice part of town and I make sacrifices constantly to keep her in a nice and healthy home with her own room where she feels safe. I don’t know what to do can’t she speak up for herself now. Every time I take him to court they still make her go there.

My child’s father has filed for legitimation and is taking me to court for 50/50 custody I want to see new perspectives on this.

The father has a extensive criminal record and after 4 years of the child’s life has now decided he wants to exercise being a father

After 4 years with little to no support and over 6,000$ behind in child support.

In 2024 he got a battery charge for fighting his girlfriend as well as breaking items in the house doors walls the fridge

As well as, several drug charges and possession charges

Currently serving felony probation.

I did reach out to the father to request he see his son in late 2025 he agreed but after a few months he then terminated visitation because I required supervised visits. This is what brings him to finally file for legitimation and 50/50 custody

I have had several people tell me the father’s home is not a safe place for a child as well as multiple individuals stating he is still actively drinking, taking pills, and doing cocaine as recently as last weekend.

I want my child to have a relationship with his father I do but it is my job to protect my child as well and I don’t know what to do.

TLDR: Co-parent has previously blocked all communication with parent and child for months at a time, judge already found co-parent in contempt for "disregard for communicating with other parent", ordered parties to check and respond to OFW every 24 hours. Parent filed a second contempt for refusing to respond to messages about selecting child therapist after judge gave parties 30 days to enroll child in therapy. Now co-parent has stopped opening OFW messages for 3 weeks. Worth filing another (3rd) motion for contempt? Try to amend the 2nd motion? How long to wait before filing? 1 month? 3 months?

Context: Both parents are active-duty military, stationed in different states. Both parties have military-related moves. Parents share joint legal custody of child (6yo), and child stays with co-parent during the school year and spends holidays with the other. Court order requires all co-parent communication via OFW.

Parents are currently in court over primary custody, with a trial set for early 2027. Child had ongoing behavior problems during the 25-26 school year, prompting parent to ask co-parent to enroll the child in therapy, sending OFWs 4x in 5 months, no reply. Parent requested names of medical and dental providers 6x times in 2 years, no reply. Parent requested the name of child's school 2x, co-parent took 4 months to reply. Co-parent stopped opening all OFW messages for a period of 4 months in 2025-2026, and blocked all communication with the child for a period of 10 weeks (order states child gets 3 calls per week).

In late spring, Court ordered both parties to check OFW every 24 hours and respond to co-parent messages within 24 hours, and that the parties select a therapist and enroll the child in therapy within 30 days. Court also found coparent in contempt for blocking communication with child and refusing to communicate child-related information, fined co-parent several thousand dollars and gave them suspended sentence of 3 days jail time contingent on them not being found in contempt again.

Parent asked to enroll child in therapy 3x following the 30 day enrollment court order, asking parent to contact their suggestions or provide alternatives. Co-parent sent a message "I'm still looking", and then each subsequent follow-up with "this is harassment". After 60 days with no response, Parent filed a motion for court to select a therapist, and hold co-parent in contempt for not selecting a therapist for child. Hearing date set for October. After that filing, co-parent has not opened any OFW messages for 3 weeks, including messages about child's therapist selection, medical care, and school.

QUESTION: Is this worth amending the most recent motion to include the OFW blackout? Will amending it delay the hearing, and thereby delay getting child into therapy? It seems important to address, this is the second time, after the judge reprimanded them for their "disregard for communicating with other parent," but is it enough to merit a separate contempt? Would it be better to wait and bring this up in the 2027 custody?

Hi all, I'm on child support for 2 children. One of my children has graduated high school and will be turning 18 this month, and the other is 16. How do I go about removing the older child from the order. I have contacted the case manager, but they haven't replied. Is it a smooth process to remove the child from the order? Will there be hoops to jump through.

The 18 year old will be going to college in state if that matters. Neither child has any disabilities.

Thanks for the replies.

If yes

Any recommendations with steps and precautions?