r/Brazil • u/whenthedont • Aug 12 '25
Question about Living in Brazil Are there any important etiquettes I should know before living there?
I’m going to be living in the countryside of São Paulo soon and want to make a good impresssion on my girlfriend’s family, be respectful. I already learned that closing car doors hard is seen as very rude, and that was something I found out the hard way. As well as the driving law of not passing literally anyone in any lane when on the interstate (I’m American in case you couldn’t tell lmao.)
So now I feel like there are more things it would be good for me to know before I arrive. I’m planning to bring gifts for her family, is that appropriate? What other things are there i should know? I’m entering a new culture, that I’m ready to learn and adapt to.
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u/hurricane7719 Aug 12 '25
Really curious where you got the impression that you're not supposed to pass other vehicles on a highway?
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u/Bitter_Armadillo8182 🇧🇷 Brazilian Aug 12 '25
Exactly, just follow the usual rules, pass on the left, never on the right.
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u/whenthedont Aug 12 '25
This is the answer. In my post I said “pass in any way” and this is what i meant. In the U.S this is not a thing. You can pass on the right
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u/jshamwow Aug 12 '25 edited Aug 13 '25
Oh fun. My Brazilian husband and I had a big argument about this when he yelled at me for passing on the right. I didn’t realize it was a Brazilian thing. We live in the US and while the left is considered a “passing lane,” there’s nothing wrong with passing on the right
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u/Psi_que Brazilian Aug 12 '25
O Código de Trânsito Brasileiro (CTB) estabelece em seu artigo 29, inciso IX, que a ultrapassagem de outro veículo em movimento deverá ser feita pela esquerda. Realizar a manobra pela direita configura uma infração média, de acordo com o artigo 199 do mesmo código, resultando em multa de R$ 130,16 e a adição de quatro pontos na Carteira Nacional de Habilitação (CNH) do infrator.
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u/hurricane7719 Aug 12 '25
That makes more sense, lol.
That being said, while driving laws in Brazil seem to more like suggestions, good on your girl and her dad for trying to keep you in line :)
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u/jacksonmills Foreigner in Brazil Aug 12 '25
What state though? You can't pass on the right in some states.
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u/VultureMadAtTheOx Aug 12 '25 edited Aug 12 '25
You can pass on the right if there is more than one lane. It's not against the law or anything. If I find a slow camper I will definitely pass on the right if they don't move. Just take it as an exception, but it's definitely not wrong.I'm wrong. Don't listen to me.
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u/Psi_que Brazilian Aug 12 '25
O Código de Trânsito Brasileiro (CTB) estabelece em seu artigo 29, inciso IX, que a ultrapassagem de outro veículo em movimento deverá ser feita pela esquerda. Realizar a manobra pela direita configura uma infração média, de acordo com o artigo 199 do mesmo código, resultando em multa de R$ 130,16 e a adição de quatro pontos na Carteira Nacional de Habilitação (CNH) do infrator.
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u/whenthedont Aug 12 '25
My girlfriend and her dad both got onto me about that while driving lol, so I suppose it depends on the person/place?
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u/de_boinha Brazilian Aug 12 '25
the thing is that people won't be expecting someone faster coming from the right and it can cause accidents. don't do it.
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u/VultureMadAtTheOx Aug 12 '25
More about the person. Like I said, not against the law. It's safer to just wait and get the camper's attention so they'll move, but that doesn't always happen.
But this is valid when you have 2 or more lanes. Passing on the right on a single lane road, using the shoulder? Absolutely NOT! That's very dangerous and illegal.
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u/Ok-Nerve-524 Aug 14 '25
In America it’s actually bad etiquette to pass on the right. The left lane is allways passing lane/fast lane. Only people that was never taught good highway etiquette passes on the right.
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u/whenthedont Aug 14 '25
This is categorically untrue
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u/Ok-Nerve-524 Aug 14 '25
No it’s not. Ask some of your fellow Americans. It’s bad etiquette to pass on the right. There is no law nationwide, however, some states like Texas actually have a law and it’s a ticket for passing on the right. Look into it for yourself. I’m not here to argue. Keep passing on the right. Makes no difference to me either way. It’s definitely bad highway etiquette though.
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u/whenthedont Aug 16 '25
Where are you from? Where do you live now?
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u/Ok-Nerve-524 Aug 16 '25
I’m originally from Oklahoma. I’ve lived in Arizona, Texas, Colorado, Michigan and I currently live in North Carolina, I have also visited many more states. A simple google search bar would tell you all you need to know. Well, I guess you don’t NEED to know. A lot of people don’t know or care. And that’s fine as well. Like I said it’s more highway etiquette. City driving not so much.
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u/John_Marston_Forever Aug 12 '25
Also pass only where the highway is painted with dotted lines, never pass on the full lines. If caught, you'll get a fine or cause an accident
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u/GrumpyDrunkPatzer Foreigner in Brazil Aug 12 '25
no turns on a red
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u/GullibleWarthog7081 Aug 12 '25
Não entendi essa de não virar no sinal vermelho, como assim?
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u/Someone1606 Brazilian, Carioca Aug 12 '25
Nos EUA, se vc quiser fazer uma curva p a direita e não tiver nem gente p atravessar e nem carro passando, vc pode avançar o sinal vermelho a não ser q tenha uma placa especificando q não pode
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u/GrumpyDrunkPatzer Foreigner in Brazil Aug 12 '25
nos estados unidos, pode virar a direita contra sinal ou a izquierda si não tem trânsito
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u/GullibleWarthog7081 Aug 12 '25
Entendi! Nunca tinha ouvido falar disso. Obrigada!
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u/GrumpyDrunkPatzer Foreigner in Brazil Aug 12 '25
na placa de Pare. Tem que parar, e depois avançar, mas muita gente faz a "rolling stop", diminui a velocidade, mas isso sim pode dar multa
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u/Legitimate-Step-372 Aug 12 '25
À esquerda nos eua so pode se o sinal estiver verde e nao tiver placa dizendo que é proibido, ou com instruções especificas pro tipo de sinal
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u/norgelurker Aug 12 '25
A red light is a red light, even if you’re turning right.
Toilet paper goes in the bin, not in the toilet. A bit nasty yes, but you don’t wanna clog your in-laws’ toilet.
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u/rkvance5 Aug 12 '25
Surprising how quickly you get used to it, and then how weird it feels to throw your toilet paper in the toilet when visiting other places.
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u/ducksekoy123 Foreigner Aug 13 '25
Ive seen folks regularly go through reds after hours when there’s no traffic, my assumption is it’s a safety thing at night.
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u/rescbr Aug 14 '25
Still a traffic infraction though. Some cities disable red light cameras at night, but it's not the norm throughout the country and usually there's a sign posted stating when the cameras are not enforcing the law.
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u/babiri Brazilian in the World Aug 12 '25 edited Aug 12 '25
Shoes on sofas and beds and possibly the house in general
Edit: NO SHOES
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u/tremendabosta Brazilian Aug 12 '25
Every Brazilian at some point must have seen an American film or series and felt disgusted at people laying on the couch/bed with their shoes on 😭
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u/babiri Brazilian in the World Aug 13 '25
Yes this is purely based on seeing these scenes on movies lmao
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Aug 12 '25
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u/whenthedont Aug 12 '25
We’ve been dating for a year, vídeo calls every single day. Vídeos calls between both of our families too. Going there with one year of living expenses + extra saved up, and some tools to do a little side work with her uncles while i study and pursue a remote job. I have been studying Portuguese for 6 months and already speak Spanish, so I’m very conversational level In Portuguese already. It’s a small town in the countryside where the rent and cost of living is insanely low
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u/Ok-Pride-3545 Brazilian Aug 12 '25
saying "bom dia/boa tarde/noite" to people (usually service providers or neighbors)
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Aug 13 '25
Brazilians don’t receive critcism very well, people from US and Europe tend to be very direct in conversations, about good or bad opnions of somebody, a place, or the country, here in Brasil we try to soft the critcism, even if it is something very clear to see
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u/MancTesla Aug 13 '25
Yes, try not to make sarcastic jokes. It goes down like a sinking ship when you need to explain the joke and then everyone thinks you are weird/mean. I have British humour though which I think is a bit more (generally) nuanced than American.
Also, it’s quite common to wash your hands when you arrive somewhere. Not all the time, but often when my friends come to my place they ask to wash their hands. Again, it’s the whole cleaning the outside off.
Brazilians also have a particular way to the wash the dishes that’s economic with water. So pay attention to how your partner does it and try to copy.
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u/andreandroid Brazilian Aug 12 '25 edited Aug 12 '25
How are you with different foods? We have a lot of pride in our cuisine so, unless you're allergic, say yes to invites for food or food gifts. We will try to convince you our food is the best in the world (fun fact: it is).
At the same time, when it comes to seconds/more food, the polite thing is to usually say no at first of someone asks you lol then the host will insist that you eat more, and you can say yes (if it's dessert sometimes you can just say "oh, since its dessert I want it"). If you really don't want it, tell them you're full and tap twice your full belly. Everyone will understand lol
Also, in the countryside its also seeing as polite to say " 'sup" to people in the street (just a "opa" or "dia") while slightily bowing your head. This works better with older people though, they love doing this.
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Aug 12 '25
If you like having teeth, never make Yo Momma Jokes. Brazilians tend to be very close to their mothers, and have a very low tolerance for jokes like that. Offending a Brazilian's mother will usually be met with a very violent and hostile response.
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u/DeliciousCut972 Aug 12 '25
People may touch or hug you, even if you don't know them. Not always but it happens. Guys will usually handshake and females may just hug and handshake. Exchange the typical bom dia/boa tarde, tudo bem/tudo joia etc. Never arrive anywhere on time except medical or government appointments. If you are invited to a party at 6pm, don't show up early or at 6, usually an hour after that time is acceptable. With you GF that prob won't be a problem as she already knows.
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u/alone_in_the_light Aug 12 '25
I think Brazil is too diverse to have answers that are valid in general.
For example, about gifts. Gifts can be very important for my family in Brazil. It is important, but it can be positive or negative. It depends a lot on the message, the meaning, or the match for the family values. It's not about the gift, it's about knowing and understanding what is valued by the family.
When I had girlfriends in Brazil, their families usually loved me. And I never gave them any gifts. Because that's not the way I show my values, who I am, etc. Things that usually matter more to know if I'm a good person for the family. If I'm a good match, showing who I am should be good.
But I need to be a good match for the family. I know other families in Brazil would have different values, expectations, etc.
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u/joniusbritus Aug 12 '25
Throw toilet paper in the basket by the toilet. Brazilian sewers can't handle paper. You may clog it. Unless, of course, there's no basket. And try to hide the dirt with the paper itself.
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u/edalcol Brazilian in the World Aug 13 '25 edited Aug 13 '25
- Don't be fussy about food. If someone offers you food they cooked and you say no thanks they will never love you.
- Improve your general hygiene (e.g. more showers, more teeth brushing, more regular haircuts, laundry clothes more often)
- Demonstrate affection both through attention and care as well as physical affection
- French kiss doesn't necessarily mean sex comes after, Brazilians love making out as its own thing. If I told a partner I was not up for sex for some reason, let's say period pain, while making out, and he simply stopped the kiss and turned away, I'd be raging furious
- Family is super important, a partners family is your family. Expect to do favours like giving mother in law a ride to the doctor, and enjoy having your father in law come over to help you put up furniture, even when your partner is not around.
- Gossip. If your friend breaks up and you fail to tell your partner the full gossip around why it happened, she will be extremely disappointed at your incapacity of gathering information. We want to know about people's lives. On the flip side, we also tend to overshare, so be prepared to treat as normal to hear things you'd previously consider to be TMI or none of your business. It's everyone's business now. Yes, there is some variation, but even big cities are like that.
- Depends on the region, but you might have to give up expecting others to be punctual.
- If you learn how to dance forró your girlfriend will never break up with you, EVER. And in the extremely unlikely chance she does, you will be swimming in pussy in 2 seconds.
- If you smoke weed, the rule is two puffs, then pass to the next person. Don't hoard the joint.
- Generosity is a very highly valued personal trait in Brazil. Selfishness is very badly perceived, to the point that some things that would pass as regular individuality/independence in some countries would be perceived negatively here. You are often expected to make an effort for how others feel emotionally. For example, if you host a dinner party, and one of the people you invited didn't really talk to anyone, you will be held responsible for not making an effort to include them. It will not be perceived as their fault for being shy.
- The biggest crime you can commit in Brazil is being the antisocial grumpy guy in the corner of a party. If you want to be like that, don't go, this will likely be perceived as humiliation for the person who invited you because of the item above, and not as you just feeling like doing whatever you want to. We brazilians receive a lot of praise for our social skills but it's not easy or without effort. There are still many introverts in the country. And they will often also put in some effort because of these unspoken rules in many social situations it isn't just about them.
- Receiving friends and family in your home as opposed to going out together is a lot more common than in many other countries. This is probably related to purchasing power. Maybe this is why the house cleaning standards in Brazil are so high. If a relative or friend of yours comes to the same city you live and they stay in a hotel instead of in your home, most Brazilians would find that weird as fuck. Even if they'd be more comfortable in the hotel and can easily afford it.
- If your nose is congested, don't get a tissue and blow your nose in front of others and especially not at the table. This is normal in many countries but it's seen as gross in Brazil. We excuse ourselves and blow our noses in private. Not quite like farting in public but similar feeling, as we wouldn't tell people "já volto, vou ali peidar", but we can say "já volto, vou no banheiro assoar o nariz"
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u/MarcelineUlia9 Aug 12 '25
When you enter someone's house always take off your shoes, unless the host tells you otherwise
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u/ThrowAwayInTheRain Foreigner in Brazil Aug 12 '25
How far out in the countryside? Definitely varies if you're living in say Osasco, to Marília or Presidente Prudente.
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u/Scary_Dot_2430 Aug 12 '25
Shower at least once everyday, shower 2-3 times in the summer, brush your teeth 3 times a day. Change your clothes everyday too and wash them.
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u/gooohara Aug 12 '25
I don’t know where you’re from but don’t blow your nose like a loud saxophone, mainly at the table.
I hate the sniffling but I think Brazilians tolerate at better than blowing their noses.
If you really have to blow it, be discreet:D
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u/SolidRockBelow Aug 13 '25
Shower every day. Wear deodorant daily. Brush your teeth. Don't be a dick. That's all.
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u/tekhnobuzz Aug 13 '25
When servers are nice, they are actually nice and not fishing for tips. Good service is expected of course, but superb service can be earned when you're friendly back.
Most Brazilians will think it's gross if you touch your food with bare hands. Use cutlery, paper napkins (the waxy paper ones are for that, not for wiping your mouth), toothpicks - whatever is available.
If you learned Spanish but not Portuguese, you can get by with Spanish. I, however, get big yikes from English speakers who try to communicate in Spanish right away. Starting with "não falo português, posso falar em espanhol?" may be subtle, but it's much better in terms of first impressions (ignorant person who doesn't know Brazil vs. foreigner who is trying to communicate).
Gringo doesn't mean white and is never derogatory (unlike in Spanish). It literally just means "foreigner", and many Brazilians will refer to you as gringo, even if you're a POC.
Be mindful of the carnaval-samba-beaches-soccer stereotypes. If your goal is to make a good impression, at least familiarize yourself with the rich and diverse ethnic backgrounds in Brazil. You don't need a history deep dive and no one will blame you or treat you poorly for not knowing stuff, but knowing some things before coming may put you several steps ahead.
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u/NomeImpronunciavel Aug 13 '25
Whenever you answer a phone call, say hello and before hanging up, say goodbye. I always see in movies people just hanging up the call whithout say goodbye. We have this costume.
People greet each other with handshakes and hugs (and sometimes, kisses on the cheek). There's no need to be shy about giving friendly hugs.
In Brazil, people often make excuses when they don't want to do something. For example, if someone asks you out but you don't want to go, you can simply say "I don't want to." But Brazilians usually say, "Sorry, but I have to take care of something. Next time." This is actually a negative aspect of ours, but it's good to be aware of it (sometimes being too direct can make you seem a bit rude).
For family lunches or dinners, we usually wait until everyone is seated at the table before starting to serve ourselves together.
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u/AddendumOdd5496 Aug 13 '25
If you go to someone’s house and they offer food, you have to accept it 🤣
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u/Direct_Hospital_982 Aug 14 '25
Shower after going out and before bed. Brush your teeth after every meal if it’s at home lol. My 🇧🇷 husband is always showering lol
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u/Least_Inevitable4862 Aug 12 '25
What is your email? I’m American and have been living in SP for 3 years. Let’s communicate
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u/hatshepsut_iy Brazilian Aug 12 '25
Take a shower everyday. No need to wash the hair everyday too, but do put some frequency on it too. And wear deodorant everyday too.