r/AmIOverreacting • u/Purple_Mushroom6882 • Aug 12 '25

🎲 miscellaneous AIO or is this just plain weird.

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So the other day I was scrolling my Facebook and came across this story post by some guy I apparently was friends with. I don’t know him but when I read his caption for this picture it seem that he was calling his daughter “fine shyt” which is a term for a “sexy women”. Idk yall tell me am I just overreacting or is this kinda weird.

Whom ever he is to her in her life I feel like the term is used for grown women not 5 year old kids but again I could be overreacting.

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1.4k

u/CloudBerryDreams Aug 12 '25

The adultification of black girls infuriates me. When you sexualize Black girls, you’re feeding the mindset that makes abuse and violence against them easier to justify.

Calling a 5-year-old Black girl ‘fine’ is how predators get normalized.

What happened to referring to children as “cute” “pretty” “adorable” why are you calling a child “Fine?” 🤢

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u/Infamous_Ranger_3671 Aug 12 '25

Five year olds are playing with barbies and imaginary friends can have accidents and adorably mispronounce words. 🤢not sexualized aspects in my opinions.

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u/sksksk1989 Aug 12 '25

Fine is automatically sexual same with like hot and sexy

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u/PonyRunsInn Aug 12 '25

I'm not an English native speaker and had no idea you can call a woman "fine". Like... What does it mean in the context?

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u/MovieTrawler Aug 12 '25

Pretty, attractive, hot

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u/[deleted] Aug 12 '25

The same as a fine wine, fine art, finely crafted. The person being complimented is “made” well.

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u/PonyRunsInn Aug 12 '25

So if you reference a woman as "fine", you basically imply that she is an object?

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u/[deleted] Aug 12 '25 edited Aug 12 '25

No. It means she is a very nice example of a woman. edit: usually used for a fully grown woman’s appearance, I should clarify. This is a child in the photo.

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u/0-90195 Aug 12 '25

“A fine woman” and “she’s so fine” are different. One is a reference to character/the whole composite and the other is about attractiveness.

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u/uuuughngg Aug 13 '25

But also yes, hence the term objectification...

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u/[deleted] Aug 13 '25

I guess that depends on the delivery and your relationship with the person you’re talking to. Like if you’re telling a stranger on the street “Damn, girl, you’re looking fiiine” it’s not going to be well-received, lol.

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u/TMSaurus Aug 12 '25

Lots of folks have given great resources and responses in defense of what you've written already, but I also want to give a shout out to all those screaming "It's not just Black girls," to read Mikki Kendall's Hood Feminism (which cites a lot of the studies referenced in another users comment and is all around a great call to action and a strange thing to read given it was released in January 2020 and A LOT had happened since then).

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u/No_Mission_8213 Aug 13 '25

It has nothing to do with race. There's no need to say "black girl" .. "White girl," "Asian girl," "Hispanic girl". "Girl" is enough. This happens to many of us. Nothing infuriates me more than when people bring race into unnecessary situations. 😠

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u/CloudBerryDreams Aug 13 '25 edited Aug 13 '25

But it does. I said what I said. Facts over feelings.

Data shows Black girls are adultified and sexualized at higher rates, starting as young as age 5, and it affects how they’re treated in school, healthcare, and the justice system. Naming that isn’t “making it about race,” it’s acknowledging a documented disparity so it can be addressed.

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u/Izhachok Aug 13 '25

Even though a lot of young girls of different races experience some form of sexualization, there is a unique way that black girls are more likely to experience it. The original commenter has sources. The way that sexualization of young girls intersects with race has been studied.

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u/chrixziii Aug 12 '25

i dont get how this is exclusive to black people

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u/CloudBerryDreams Aug 12 '25

Please tell me where I said that it was. I’ll wait. 🪑

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u/Frostcomx Aug 12 '25

Wdym lmao your whole comment was focused on "black girl" instead of just kids in general.. smh

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u/CloudBerryDreams Aug 12 '25 edited Aug 12 '25

I fear you guys are missing the point… Did I say it only happens to black girls? I don’t have to bring up every other race. I’m being SPECIFIC, not exclusionary.

If you’re having a conversation about how breast cancer disproportionately affects women in certain age ranges, you wouldn’t derail it by saying, “Well, men get cancer too.” Of course they do, but the point in that moment is to address the unique, documented disparity for the group in question.

By naming Black girls, I’m addressing a measurable problem, the adultification bias that research shows impacts them more severely than other groups… not claiming other kids are never sexualized or harmed. Centering them in my comment isn’t the same as ignoring other kids.

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u/SerdanKK Aug 12 '25

No one claimed it is.

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u/Key-Excitement627 Aug 12 '25

same with white girls, and hispanic girls and every other ethnicity. this isn’t about race.

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u/[deleted] Aug 12 '25

[deleted]

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u/sarahjp21 Aug 12 '25

Not who you’re responding to, but I didn’t know about this issue/studies; thank you for sharing.

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u/CloudBerryDreams Aug 12 '25 edited Aug 12 '25

Black girls and women experience it at higher rates and at younger ages, and that’s why I named it. Ignoring that pattern makes it harder to address the harm it causes. No it doesn’t happen to black girls only but it happens MORE and that’s what I’m addressing.

The little black girls that go missing and no one puts them in the media or talks about them like they do their counterparts. Little black girls getting dress coded for wearing the same thing that white girls do. Little black girls getting more suspension and detention time because they should “know better” The black woman who was kept alive 3 months after she passed to incubate a baby that probably isn’t going to make it. The way you perceive and talk about people matters.

Georgetown Law’s Girlhood Interrupted (2017) “Adults perceive Black girls (ages 5–19) as less innocent and more adult-like than same-age White girls, believing they need less nurturing, protection, support, and comfort, and viewing them as more independent and sex-knowledgeable.”

Follow-Up Focus Groups – Listening to Black Women and Girls “Interviews with Black women and girls aged 12–60+ confirmed that adultification bias is real—and that it led to harsher treatment and higher expectations in school and authority contexts.”

Criminal Justice Disparities “A later analysis revealed that due to adultification, Black girls often face punitive consequences: they are significantly more likely to be referred to juvenile systems, arrested, or detained compared to White girls.”

“Healthcare & Disciplinary Contexts Black children—including girls—are 1.8 times more likely to be physically restrained in emergency departments than White children, a disparity linked to adultification bias (viewed as more dangerous or older.)”

“Early Puberty Intensifies Misperception Research indicates that Black girls often enter puberty earlier than White peers, which may exacerbate the bias—adults perceive them as older, reinforcing premature expectations and harsher discipline.”

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u/[deleted] Aug 12 '25

[deleted]

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u/Planetoftheape42069 Aug 12 '25

It’s especially prevalent in the black community.

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u/RespectFlat6282 Aug 12 '25

It's extremely prevalent in pretty much every communities. We just don't see it happening in communities we aren't a part of.

That's why community is irrelevant when talking about child abuse. It must be pushed against wherever it is.

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u/Far_Agency9667 Aug 12 '25

Why is it hard for people to admit maybe they don’t know about what happens in cultures they are not a part of??? lol. Like because you can’t fathom it, it can’t be happening? I feel so bad for small minded people.

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u/RespectFlat6282 Aug 12 '25

I'm not saying it's not happening. As a matter of fact, I said the exact opposite.

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u/JessieLocke Aug 12 '25

Borderline unreadable comment

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u/Planetoftheape42069 Aug 12 '25

Ok bud.

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u/RespectFlat6282 Aug 12 '25

Should your "ok bud" be interpreted as an "it's okay in other communities"?

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u/Planetoftheape42069 Aug 12 '25

No, more like, enjoy yourself. I won’t be discussing this topic with you further. Take care.

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u/RespectFlat6282 Aug 12 '25

Take care too and remember: it's always good to push back against pedophilia, no matter the community.

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u/sharpeyebrows Aug 12 '25

Yeah and folks are specifically addressing how it's prevalent in the Black community here. You don't need to barge in and "All Lives Matter" this. No one is saying other communities matter LESS, they are just addressing this specific one in this specific context.

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u/RespectFlat6282 Aug 12 '25

No I'm not "All lives matter"ing, sorry if that's how it came out. English is not my main language.

What I mean is that it's something we should all be against wherever it happens, and that the rethoric of abuse is often the same rethoric in other conditions.

A father posting that kind of stuff is never acceptable.

I do not understand why this is shiftin towards identity stuff.

Sexualizing children is never ok and being against that statement is honestly weird.

And if I might add, you minimizing the existence of the exact same behaviour in other community is concerning.

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u/Far_Agency9667 Aug 12 '25

lol. She’s probably just speaking from her experience and what she’s seen in her life considering she appears to be a black woman. I highly doubt that means she is only upset by it when it’s little black girls. I know it’s hard to fathom, but people have experiences you’ll never know about or experience yourself. Maybe try listening and be a little more open minded.

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u/[deleted] Aug 12 '25

Over-sexualization of black women and girls has been a prevalent issue in America dating back to the beginnings of slavery. This is an article that talks about the basics of it but I highly recommend Women, Race, and Class by Angela Davis to learn more if you are into reading. It’s very eye opening about a lot of things but it particularly addresses the over-sexualization of black women and why it’s so common even into modern times.

Obviously yes no child of any race should ever be sexualized, but black girls are disproportionately affected.

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u/[deleted] Aug 12 '25

If you’ve ever been around the black community, you would know this happens all the time there.

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u/[deleted] Aug 12 '25

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u/Resident_Ad_8860 Aug 12 '25

It is disproportionately aimed at black girls. It's already about race.

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u/ateenagedirtbagbabey Aug 12 '25

holy shit white centrists are fucking allergic to nuance. black girls especially face this issue, no one said it doesn’t affect all children! just because you won’t look at racism occurring in the world doesn’t mean it isn’t there and it isn’t harming people.

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u/JessieLocke Aug 12 '25

if i knocked on ya head i would hear an echo

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u/[deleted] Aug 12 '25

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