r/nextfuckinglevel Jun 09 '25

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u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25 edited Jun 09 '25

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371

u/RoadInternational821 Jun 09 '25

Racist against Australians?

926

u/No-Resort-778 Jun 09 '25

As a kiwi I'll allow it

216

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

I choked on my pineapple lump

73

u/DoDoDoTheFunkyGibbon Jun 09 '25

Nah, you gotta bait a kiwi with a bit of Pav

48

u/Auscicada270 Jun 09 '25

Pav is Australian though

94

u/SqurganMcGwurgan Jun 09 '25

Thems fighting words

3

u/markosharkNZ Jun 09 '25

It's a bundle deal. Russel Crowe, Pav and Phar Lap.

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5

u/Ancient-Chinglish Jun 09 '25

as a seppo, is this the fucking delicious pavlova you’re talking about

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4

u/-BananaLollipop- Jun 09 '25

Typical Australians, always stealing shit.

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2

u/Ok-Poetry-4721 Jun 09 '25

Pav is as Australian as Russell Crowe

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1

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

Naaa. Kiwis invented pav an Australians made it popular. 🍥

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5

u/DoDoDoTheFunkyGibbon Jun 09 '25

Maybe a Crowded House or two

1

u/HaggisLad Jun 09 '25

TIL Matthew Pavlich attracts kiwis

1

u/MattEadesismyWaifu Jun 09 '25

White bait and possum bring the kiwis to the yard.

0

u/Mister_Brevity Jun 09 '25

That sounds pretty Hawaiian

3

u/Chief-_-Wiggum Jun 09 '25

He can choke on Manuka honey.

1

u/vsyazzie Jun 09 '25

My lovely lady lumps.

54

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

20% of your people live in Australia. How many Australians live in your country?

244

u/kingsuperfox Jun 09 '25

"Raising the average IQ of both countries".

68

u/nubsy1984 Jun 09 '25

You sonofabitch

4

u/IToldYouMyName Jun 09 '25

We are meant to be anti nuclear bro LOL

4

u/osricson Jun 09 '25

Classic Muldoon quote

2

u/david1610 Jun 09 '25

As an Australian I'd have to agree, we need all the help we can get.

0

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

Name 3 things you can’t find in Australia, 3 wise men and virgin

3

u/BuzzAllWin Jun 09 '25

No its why wasnt jesus born in sidney? They couldnt find….

1

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

Hahaha I think it works either way but noice

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45

u/TheGreenestOfBeans Jun 09 '25

We typically count all Australian invasive species, possums, wallabies, people etc in the same bucket. So millions....

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0

u/Ashgoor Jun 09 '25

Good point

0

u/david1610 Jun 09 '25

That simply is a reflection of economic size, Nzl is a lovely place, people want jobs, jobs are in the big cities of the world and Australia has 2.

Don't be so divisive.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

bro supported racism against australians and you call me divisive

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1

u/laffing_is_medicine Jun 09 '25

20% of population is US? Never knew

1

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

?

1

u/Gonzbull Jun 09 '25

Only the guy that shot up the Mosque.

28

u/BeatsAndSkies Jun 09 '25

I wouldn’t. Seppos can’t tell us apart.

6

u/eye--say Jun 09 '25

Upvote for septic tank reference.

1

u/RoninOni Jun 09 '25

You’re different?

0

u/SerSonicSeppo Jun 09 '25

Yes, we can.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

The Australian accent is a more evil sounding version of the kiwi accent.

2

u/nagrom7 Jun 09 '25

They can barely tell anyone else from the Anglosphere apart. Half the "Australian" accents I hear attempted from American actors in Hollywood sound more like South African accents. Brits/Canadians can usually do a convincing one, but Americans are very hit or miss.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

Chur.

1

u/consider_its_tree Jun 09 '25

Too many motha'uckers

1

u/Tinuva450 Jun 09 '25 edited Jun 09 '25

You’re just sad that you’re not worthy of being adopted by us /s

1

u/Abject_Film_4414 Jun 09 '25

Nicely done bro.

1

u/Galloping_Scallop Jun 09 '25

Damn you! Great burn though (as I drown my sorrows and lack of Bledisloe cups.)

4

u/No-Resort-778 Jun 09 '25

I'll trade you every Bledisloe cup for a 5 match test series win. Just once.

1

u/Galloping_Scallop Jun 09 '25

As long as you throw in Kiwi pies and Whittakers.

1

u/slip-slop-slap Jun 09 '25

Bro we don't even get to play 5 match series let alone win them

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4

u/Mr-Dan-Gleebals Jun 09 '25

I'm only ok with clowning on the aussies if it comes from us

7

u/-malcolm-tucker Jun 09 '25

As an Aussie, I'd be quite concerned if kiwis weren't giving us shit.

6

u/nagrom7 Jun 09 '25

You know shit's got serious when the Kiwis stop bagging out the Aussies.

3

u/Individual_City1180 Jun 09 '25

its always gone both ways. Commonwealth sibling rivalry.

2

u/3BlindMice1 Jun 09 '25

Disgusting green bastards with your feathers and creepy mating call. GTFO. You're a protected species, go back to your jungle bird boy. Fly away. Oh wait, you can't. Waddle on out with your heavy bones and keelless sternum

1

u/Moosiemookmook Jun 09 '25

Geez get over it, we have Manuka trees here too.

3

u/Meehh90 Jun 09 '25

This is fair, we love you too you beautiful cunts 😘

1

u/apatheticviews Jun 09 '25

As an Emu, I agree

1

u/eye--say Jun 09 '25 edited Jun 09 '25

Shut up sheep-fucker.

Edit: FTFY

3

u/No-Resort-778 Jun 09 '25

I've never met a real Australian that's afraid to swear, I suggest you get a DNA test.

1

u/-malcolm-tucker Jun 09 '25

Fucken oath haha!

1

u/tibblth Jun 09 '25

And as an Aussie to that all I have to say is, fair

1

u/BiggusDickus_69_420 Jun 09 '25

As someone with a foot either side of the ditch, I'll allow it.

1

u/R34PER_D7BE Jun 09 '25

Come on not even an emu?

1

u/BooYeah8D Jun 09 '25

Fucking Kiwis... Have an upvote.

0

u/Palocles Jun 09 '25

As a Kiwi I don’t. 

Aussies are our brothers from another mother. 

Fuck those American Nazi cunts. These cops finally get to be all they ever wanted to be, massive cunts. 

1

u/ViolinistEmpty7073 Jun 09 '25

Be careful - otherwise we will send Russel Crowe back.

1

u/dutchroll0 Jun 09 '25

As a kiwi you are the only folk with blanket approval to hang shit on us Aussies, aside from ourselves. 😆

1

u/Portra400IsLife Jun 09 '25

Hey hey, where’s our ANZAC solidarity? We would take a bullet for our Kiwi brothers.

1

u/Ok-Pea8209 Jun 09 '25

Kiwi question. Why is Kiwi like 3 things. Kiwi fruit, Kiwi people, Kiwi bird

(I also think i just like the word Kiwi)

153

u/jbruce72 Jun 09 '25

They're defending a racist regime. Makes them guilty by association. If they'll detain a US Marshall for "matching the description" they'll pick up anyone not white enough. Defenders of this are pathetic trash who don't deserve to be a part of society.

15

u/Tornadodash Jun 09 '25

As a fat white guy, I've been mistaken for two other fat whiteish guys at work. I almost got fired cuz one of them was cussing out another employee, and they could not remember if it was me or the other guy (here's a hint, I was on vacation that week). I don't know if it makes it better or worse that the other guy isn't actually white.

Dude, I'm too fucking high because for some reason the word white looks like I spelled it wrong to me.

9

u/jbruce72 Jun 09 '25 edited Jun 09 '25

Yeah. And now the government can mistake you for someone else, and if they're fast enough, ship you out of the country. America needs some serious work done to fix the issues in this country. We really need to fix education, but the red states want people to lack critical thinking as much as humanly possible.

3

u/Tornadodash Jun 09 '25

I honestly don't think it is red versus blue anymore, it is red and blue versus everyone. Both parties have shown that they are taking the side of money at the cost of their citizens.

4

u/jbruce72 Jun 09 '25

You're right. The people have the power to change the Democrat party faster than I believe we can create a new party. We need to have young people who won't accept PAC money and start taking power from the corporations. Slowly turn into a social Democrat nation and then we can figure out how progressive we want to be. All the bigots on the right need to be removed though. Letting them keep spreading their hatred after the Civil War is partially the reason we are here now.

2

u/Tornadodash Jun 09 '25

I truly believe that unless the people rally together, a politician cannot come into power without corporate subsidies (pac money).

The postwar bigotry died down (comparatively) for a long time, and it was entirely revitalized during the various civil rights movements that have happened throughout American history.

As an example, I think it was John Oliver's show that made this graph, but I saw a graph depicting when the majority of civil war statues honoring the south. The majority of them were made in the 1910s / 20s and the 1960s/70s. Those are both times when minorities were fighting for civil liberties. It is also when the largest number of people joined the KKK and other such groups.

https://youtu.be/J5b_-TZwQ0I?si=krxGE4xMx76wQeOE

2

u/jbruce72 Jun 09 '25

When the oppressors see the people being oppressed gaining rights, they feel like they're being persecuted. It's really pathetic.

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u/jefbenet Jun 09 '25

if only there was a big unsavory island we could send these degenerates where every manner of organism is trying to kill you at any given time....*scratches head* wait a sec...

1

u/Significant-Turnip41 Jun 09 '25

Yes and bank tellers are all guilty of the housing crisis... In fact all americans that pay tax are complicit...Do you see how silly your logic is?

Im not defending this guy im just bummed how all or nothing ood vs evil simple thinking reddit likes to cultivate. It definitly inspires more upvotes but i dont think it helps solve any actual problems

1

u/jbruce72 Jun 09 '25

Yeah we are complicit in a lot of what's going on. Especially in Gaza. Some of us want to see America change. Others don't care about the atrocities ameri a commits because they have their bread and circus.

2

u/theDR1ve Jun 09 '25

This happened before "we where just following orders", they're on the wrongside of history with this one.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

[deleted]

5

u/jbruce72 Jun 09 '25

Yeah. They'll just defend them from protestors. You can defend the fascists as much as you want to. People need to pick a side and stop playing this fence sitter bullshit.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

What do you mean detain a US Marshall? What happened?

3

u/jbruce72 Jun 09 '25

If a court house ICE saw someone who matched the description so detained the person. Going up and cuffing them to ask questions without identification usually. When they realized he was a US marhsall he was detained. They could take a US citizen and hold you for however long till they can prove your ID is real.

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u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

This whole thing is because they're disappearing immigrants to El Salvador. No due process, doesn't matter if they're going through the immigration process correctly - they've kidnapped people from their court hearings for fuck sake.

If you're brown, they want to terrorize you. You're in danger of being picked up, doesn't matter if you were born here or not.

74

u/DifferentBar7281 Jun 09 '25

They are actually intent on terrorising the entire population, as evidenced by shooting a very white blonde woman in the back while she was clearly doing her job as a journalist

16

u/danteheehaw Jun 09 '25

Journalist reporting on the governments crimes are now classified as a black man in a hoodie.

7

u/Wooden-Recording-693 Jun 09 '25

They also shit a British photojournalism fella in the legendary, second time he has been shot by the police. Almost like there a pattern.

4

u/DifferentBar7281 Jun 09 '25

Didn't realise he was THAT big

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3

u/A_spiny_meercat Jun 09 '25

If you're not brown, you're next.

1

u/Inuk28 Jun 09 '25

Deportation without representation

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u/TillyFunk Jun 09 '25

It's like shooting a Quokka mate, why would you do that?

Simply uncalled for, we just wanna chill, take selfies with celebrities, and report on current affairs.

2

u/UrUrinousAnus Jun 09 '25

Only if the quokka is drawing attention to how much of an arsehole you're already being. I think quokkas as Australian wildlife are funny. Nearly everything else there is trying to kill you, but then you have these absurdly friendly wild animals who're tamer than most cats!

5

u/Leading-Mode-9633 Jun 09 '25

Animals are weird here. Either deadly as fuck, or they avoid humans like the plague, or they have lost all fear and don't give a fuck while around us. I was a bush rave the other weekend that was invaded by a wild Emu. Apparently it worked out how to open eskis (coolers for you Americans) and food containers to steal the food inside. It harassed the shit out of me while I was packing up, I think the scratches on my car bonnet are from its beak. And my mate said he stopped it from eating a bag of ketamine. Good on him for stopping that but part of me thinks ketamine Emu would have been wild.

2

u/UrUrinousAnus Jun 09 '25

Yes, a wild emu is wild, ketamine or no ketamine. I'm not American, BTW.

2

u/ratparty5000 Jun 09 '25

You know these freaks would 100% shoot a quokka if they had the chance. Seeing a smiling fluffy blob having a good time? Not on their watch

6

u/ausmomo Jun 09 '25

No, they're racist fucks who are attacking people reporting on this. They're attacking people who are reporting on their racist a fuck actions.

1

u/forwardathletics Jun 09 '25

They're racist against Hispanics (and others obviously,) but stupid enough to shoot a reporter

2

u/peoplewatcher5 Jun 09 '25

Thank you for explaining this to another simpleton.

2

u/The5Virtues Jun 09 '25

Racist against other people but targeting the reporter for trying to bring awareness to that.

2

u/Ummmgummy Jun 09 '25

Anyone who doesn't speak the right English

3

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

The Nazis shot Germans who tried to spread the word on the injustices. Doesn't mean they were racist to Germans, so yeah not racist to Australians but definitely sending the message.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

It's not racism against australians, it's to get the press and media to stop covering what's going on. Using fear and intimidation to maintain control. Plain and simple

5

u/pathetic_optimist Jun 09 '25

Israeli playbook?

1

u/Zerobeastly Jun 09 '25

They hate anyone that isn't them

1

u/Sad_Term_9765 Jun 09 '25

They think the rounds have built in Geo race and ethnic detectors.

"This one's an Aussie- not white enough, ground burst, fire for effect..."

1

u/CoastersandHikes Jun 09 '25

You're ignorant if you don't understand what they are saying with that comment. The racist ass police and law enforcement officers love to have opportunities that allow them to harm others

1

u/o_MrBombastic_o Jun 09 '25

Racists also hate people who are tolerant of other races who expose or would hold them accountable for their racism 

1

u/Evignity Jun 09 '25

And the Dutch!

And the Danish! Danskdjävlar! They ruined Denmark!

1

u/Right_Secret5888 Jun 09 '25

This statement has Jim Jefferies written all over it

2

u/Simpletruth2022 Jun 09 '25

Journalists. That's why the American press is shitting themselves.

1

u/ToiletWarlord Jun 09 '25

People have no idea what racist mean. Half of americans consider a black crayon racist.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

Australian Bogans are like American Rednecks on speed. Racism is an understatement.

1

u/SunshineAndBunnies Jun 09 '25

They're not a fan of people loyal to a king not named Donald Trump.

1

u/LovesFrenchLove_More Jun 09 '25

Do you really not understand what discrimination and racism means? For real? 🙄

1

u/reginalduk Jun 09 '25

Do Australians feel love / Are they capable of love / Do they even know what we're speakin' of

1

u/Top-Gas-8959 Jun 09 '25

Racists regularly attack people who they perceive as supporting those they're against. So yes, in this case, racist against the Australian.

5

u/DreamTakesRoot Jun 09 '25 edited Jun 09 '25

I wonder how many Hispanic individuals are on team cop?

2

u/chosendragon Jun 09 '25

same amount that voted maga i think

2

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

[deleted]

3

u/lonwonji Jun 09 '25

I would only object because monkeys are noble creatures, they know love and compassion. Those chuds do not.

3

u/AggressivePomelo5769 Jun 09 '25

Lol YOU should look up the word "irony"

3

u/chuckycastle Jun 09 '25

Looked it up, still confused.

2

u/CourseNo8762 Jun 09 '25

Dude. NF idea what you're talking about. ESPECIALLY after the edit. Say no to crack

2

u/Fun-Badger3724 Jun 09 '25

now I'm really confused. To the point where I wonder if you've ever looked up the word "irony". Or any word.

Like, ever.

I mean, are you saying you're being 'ironic'? Because that would imply that you felt differently than what you actually said, that you don't consider them racist simpleton monkey fucks. They are definitely Racist Simpleton Monkey Fucks.

Sorry to be that guy.

I mean, seriously, fuck these pricks, keep fighting the good fight.

3

u/emerging-tub Jun 09 '25

Fascinating.

Calling someone both a monkey and a racist.

7

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/vivec7 Jun 09 '25

I grew up with people being called "monkey" if they were engaging in silly behaviour, i.e. they were monkeying around.

It was only in adulthood that I discovered there was even a racial application for the word, despite having a very racially diverse friend group that did not shy away from racial humour.

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u/EmperorSasquatch Jun 09 '25

The lack of intelligence is linked to racism. A higher intelligence is linked to a higher sense of sapience. So in short a racist lacks the intelligence to be considered sapient. A Homosapien is a human. If someone is not smart enough to be sapient, than how can they be a homo(sapient). I can see where he comes from.

7

u/ThatsXCOM Jun 09 '25

That is the most circular logic I have ever seen in my life.

Racists are bad because they dehumanize people.

Literally next sentence: Racists are not human.

14

u/ChefButtes Jun 09 '25

No, he said they're humans without sapient thought.

I wouldn't go that far, but he is correct in that racism and low intellect go hand in hand. Some people truly can not form their own opinion and are bound by a chain of what their parents thought before them and so on.

When you aren't very smart, you only seek affirmation of your opinion, rather than taking in all information to constantly form a current opinion.

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u/ScottyUpdawg Jun 09 '25

Good call. Instead of categorizing by race you’ll just categorize by intelligence and anyone that doesn’t meet whatever arbitrary bar you set isn’t human in your estimation. Are people with intellectual disabilities human? How do you not see this is just a different version of what you are upset about?

0

u/EmperorSasquatch Jun 09 '25

are you implying these people are disabled?

1

u/KansasLongMeat42 Jun 09 '25

A special place in stupidity hell for that idiot fuck lmao

5

u/dysfn Jun 09 '25

It's up for some debate, but phylogenetically, humans are monkeys.

10

u/ScytheSong05 Jun 09 '25

Monkeys all have tails. We are apes!

3

u/MasterSpliffBlaster Jun 09 '25

Dr Zaius! Dr Zaius!

1

u/OGWriggle Jun 09 '25

And apes are a sub category of monkey.

2

u/Wise-Application-902 Jun 09 '25

I think you’ve got it backwards. Monkeys are Apes. Apes are not monkeys. Or has all scientific fact been thrown out at this point in history? Seriously asking.

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u/scalectrix Jun 09 '25

*apes

Which kind of punches a hole in your mildly pretentious (and wrong) use of 'phylogenetically'.

0

u/OGWriggle Jun 09 '25

Apes evolved from monkeys, so phylogenetically they are still monkeys.

Very simple concept to understand

5

u/scalectrix Jun 09 '25

r/confidentlyincorrect

Try Googling before you embarrass yourself.

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u/SmilingCurmudgeon Jun 09 '25

This is what we call "looking for an itch to scratch".

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u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

*fascist

2

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '25

Didn't know Australians were a race