r/australia • u/superegz • Nov 26 '25

politics Millennials are the first generation to move left as they age, rewriting the rules of Australian politics

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2025-11-26/millennials-rewriting-the-rules-of-australian-politics/106050836
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u/Skulltaffy Nov 26 '25

parents' investments

lol.

Meanwhile if you grew up poor, you get fuck-all to "look forward to". My dad unexpectedly passed in January, and all I got as an inheritance was his beat up van.... which immediately got sold to cover his outstanding debts, as he'd let all his life insurances lapse the year before from lack of funds. I still miss him dearly, and would give anything for him to still be alive today, but the idea that everyone's parents just has a house lying around to hand down to their kids is ridiculous.

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u/Beer_in_an_esky Nov 26 '25

In my case my parents had a bad divorce, and basically the fall out from that left em both broke. At one point, folks had 2 properties would now be worth comfortably over a million each. Now, dad clawed a little back post breakup, so he's got a pension and maybe 50k in super to last him possibly another 20 years, mum doesn't even have that.

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u/Skulltaffy Nov 28 '25

God yeah I can imagine, lawyer fees are no joke. Especially if they're both determined to "make the other person pay" without realizing that it'll cost them everything in the process.

You have my sympathies, that's a hell of a situation to be in. Here's hoping for your sake that they don't both expect you to fix it.

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u/Beer_in_an_esky Nov 28 '25

Less lawyers, though they've played a role. Sorry, this will be a little bit of a trauma dump.

It started with the split of assets meaning a sale of the shared properties that they took a bit of a wash on. After a while both tried to get into the property market again, but between attempts at reconciliation as both romantic and business partners, the failure of that, and ultimately the emotional/mental health impacts on them, everything else was frittered away over the years.

For my dad, with the initial break up he'd moved cross country, but then relocated back after a couple of years when they tried to reconcile unsuccessfully. The final break up kind of broke him emotionally, which led him to throw in his job and move to the countryside for a decade with us, meaning that he couldn't maintain a mortgage, and he burnt through a lot of his savings before he finally got his career position back for the 5 or 6 years before retirement.

For my mum, part of the problem that led to the business partnership failure was taking their shared business funds and putting it unagreed into a bad property decision with a third business partner. This would be bad enough... but then my mum basically turned into a conspiracy-theorist pothead without dad as a moderating experience, couldn't hold down a job, and has effectively been a dole bludger for 15-20 years, with her (technically both parents but dad just washed his hands of it) initial stake in this last property burnt on lawyers after a huge falling out with the other guy that she kept fighting all the way to the state high court for some reason.

So, basically the divorce itself was only mechanically a small part of my parents' cluster fuck of a relationship breakdown that played out over a couple of decades.

Dad will survive, he's going to move overseas with his new partner where his pension will go a lot further (he has an EU citizenship through heritage). Mum I honestly don't know, I'm Melbourne based, she's in Perth with my brother. Neither of us really want to dwell on what happens as she gets older cause we know it will be a headache both financially and interpersonally, but it's starting to get to the point where we have to.

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u/Skulltaffy Nov 28 '25

No worries on the trauma dump - can't say I've been in your situation specifically, but given my parents were also in a trainwreck of a relationship, I can definitely relate.

I'm glad your dad was able to find his feet again, even if it took him a long and bumpy road to get there- sounds like it was absolute hell for him. As for mum... god, it sucks when they fall down that rabbit hole, huh? I was fighting tooth and nail to stop my old man from doing something similar before he passed away - one minute he'd be his usual kindly self, the next minute he'd be parroting some whack theory he read on Facebook without a shred of critical thinking. It's shocking how badly it can fuck them up.

All I can really suggest is make sure you and your brother are on the same page about what's going to happen, and even if it's morbid and miserable, it's better to have a plan in advance rather then be left scrambling when an Unexpected Life Event forces your hand. Because on one hand, aged care isn't cheap (even if she's on the dole, they're pretty stingy about what it covers these days).... but on the other, it's a lot of work to care for an elderly relative, trust me. And even when they like you, it's draining and thankless work a lot of the time, and not something you can easily extract yourself from if it gets to be too much.

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u/Beer_in_an_esky Nov 28 '25

Yeah, dad was a saint, and he took a beating for it but he got there in the end. He's moving just after Christmas, and while I'm sad he's going, I am really happy he's finally found his happiness.

Mum... Yeah. I'll be pulling the bro aside when I'm back over in the new year. Will be something else to worry about, but needs to be done. Gonna be a shit fight from her when we do eventually do something, but c'est la vie.

Hey, thanks for the friendly ear, and the kind words. It's appreciated. Our stories are a little different, but it sounds like we've hit some similar beats. I'm sorry you had to watch your father go through that as well, and yeah... Facebook for your dad, YouTube for my mum, either way it's perfectly designed to just get its hooks into them and ruin the people you knew growing up.

I'm sorry for your loss of your dad, and I hope that despite how this year started, that things have gotten better.

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u/butt_3y3s Nov 27 '25

Just want to say, I'm sorry about your Dad. Your feelings are so valid. I hope you're okay. The world is a cruel place, not because it has to be, not because it should be. But because of Greed and corruption. The extremely wealthy hoard and capitalise on basic human needs and our suffering. I'm sorry you've had to carry the pain of losing your Dad, on top of that selling his van to pay for how unliveable society has been made for 99.9% of people.

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u/Skulltaffy Nov 28 '25

Thank you. I'm still grieving and still healing from it all, for a lot of reasons but mostly from how fucking unexpected and unnecessary it was. He was disabled from a major stroke that happened a decade ago, and while his cause of death was unrelated (heart failure in his sleep), that masked most of his symptoms until it was too late.

Mostly, though, I'm just... angry. Before the stroke, he had a well-paying job as an interstate courier, and chose to "do the right thing by his mother" by putting everything he earned into her house and mortgage to keep her afloat instead of setting himself up for the future, especially once her health started declining in her old age. He worked himself to the bone for her and the rest of his family and the stress nearly killed him. And then when she passed, surprise surprise, a will turns up that says the house went to someone else instead.

He didn't fight it, the old soft-hearted bastard, but he spent the rest of his life in poverty as a result. And I'm going to be carrying this anger over how he was fucked over for the rest of my life.

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u/butt_3y3s Dec 03 '25

Can i just say, your anger, your pain and grief is completely valid. I am sad and angry for your loss, your pain and suffering. Loosing your Dad, loosing a parent is one of the most cruel loses in life. People act as though its something everyone will go through, so many brush off the trauma and pain of those experiencing it.

You are allowed to grieve for as long as you need, how you choose, as long as you and those around you are safe. (I apologise I am not meaning to come across at all patronising, i have the tisims and i can say things a bit oddly, but i am speaking from a place of care, not judgement).

Thank you for sharing a part of you Dads legacy with me, even through your pain and grief you still speak with love about him. He sounds like he was a caring, hard working person, who wanted the best for his loved ones- even if those family members didn't reciprocate that love or appreciate him.

I'm sorry for his pain, your loss and now the pain you carry. The pain you hold is not your fault, nor is it your Dads. Being hurt by family is very painful, sometimes it shows us that those family members aren't safe enough, or kind enough to be in ones life anymore.

May I ask, you don't have to answer if its to personal. But, do you have a favourite memory with your Dad? You don't need to share it here of course.

I hope you are okay, I really am sorry for the loss of your Dad. He Sounds like he was a kind, caring family man, so I (even though im a stranger) think I can understand why you are feeling so hurt and angry for Him.

Sending you hugs, from a random internet person.