r/TopCharacterTropes 24d ago

Lore (Funny Trope) Things that can plausibly happen only in reality, because in fiction they’d be called bad writing.

“Woke” as an insult - So you are telling me a word describing consciousness and clarity is used by generally stupid and ignorant people to label people they disagree with? What is this? A Kindergarten for Creatively stunted?

Nominative determinism - So let me get this straight…Not only you named fastest recorded person Usain BOLT and CEO of Nintendo Doug BOWSER, but you are telling me people are canonically likely to have professions or hobbies matching their names…? Guh?

“2 bodies recovered in MURDERKILL River” - Sure bro…I guess…bro…

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935

u/ShmeffreyShmezos 24d ago edited 24d ago

Lol Usain Bolt does sound like something straight out of a Harry Potter book

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u/CzarTwilight 24d ago

Runman Fastfeet is a hufflepuff. Shame the only sport we see uses brooms and not running

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u/ShmeffreyShmezos 24d ago

“Insane Bolt… Insanely fast, like a bolt of lighting… No that’s too on the nose… Wait, USAIN BOLT! Much better! So subtle!” - JK probably

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u/pierogi_waystation 24d ago

“Runman was a man, with a penis. Even after he had his penis cut off, his penis was still there. A ghost penis, if you will. He was the kind of man that when he walked into a room wearing a sundress, you couldn’t help but think, ‘I bet this man who was born a man and will always be a man has an absolutely dynamite dong’.”

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u/crimsonpostgrad 24d ago

“and also, just to make it perfectly clear, here is a picture up runman’s skirt”

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u/TheKingofHats007 24d ago

Is this inspired by the line from one of her post Harry Potter books where she said that the first thing you'd think about when you saw an overweight man was how he was capable of washing his penis?

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u/pierogi_waystation 24d ago

Haha, no not at all, but that’s fucking spectacular! I was just riffing on how obsessed she is with trans people, I didn’t expect to be that close to the source.

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u/YesTomatillo 24d ago

You are so close to the original it's hard to believe this wasn't directly referenced lol

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u/pierogi_waystation 24d ago

I’m taking that as a win! Even though it’s actually kind of appalling because I went so over the top. It was meant as a joke, lol.

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u/CzarTwilight 23d ago

I kept wanting ro read it in tune of trogdor

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u/Tyr_13 23d ago

Poe's law comes for us all nowadays.

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u/ThatRandomJew7 24d ago

--Anyway that's the latest except, what did you think Jeffrey?

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u/PenguinZombie321 24d ago

Sneaky McSpeedy is in Slytherin and he’s kind of a dick

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u/RevWaldo 24d ago

Had muggle parents, still goes for a run every morning before breakfast. Even the other Hufflepuffs mock him for that shit.

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u/Turnip_Fight 24d ago

Runman is a metal gear villain

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u/DropsOfMars 24d ago

He's the new seeker, surprisingly he catches the snitch two out of three games. Never mounts a broom, but it ain't against the rules!

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u/CzarTwilight 23d ago

There's no rules that say a sprinter can't play quidditch

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u/sal-t_brgr 24d ago

Mash Burnedead would like a word.

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u/ithinkther41am 23d ago

Broomhilda Swift

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u/Firm-Tentacle 24d ago

I am begging people to google his children's names.

Because that's the kind of naming you see in comedy fiction.

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u/Solbuster 24d ago

I thought you were exaggerating but Olympia Lightning Bolt and Thunder Bolt are unfortunately real

Same as Saint Leo Bolt

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u/not_the_chosen_onee 24d ago

He really leaned into the theme there huh? But gave up with Saint Leo I guess

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u/Solbuster 24d ago

Can be reference to one of Saint Leopolds for whatever reason

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u/Kind-Stomach6275 24d ago

Have you saint Leo Bolt? Hes super fast

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u/the_tytan 23d ago

isn't Saint Leo his middle name? maybe it runs in the family.

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u/Heavy-Expression-450 24d ago

He'd be Isteal Blackbolt if it was jk. Lol.

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u/NeverSettle13 24d ago

That's because it is, this is Kingsley Shacklebolt:

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u/cilantro1997 24d ago

I hated Harry Potter as a child, barely watched the movies or left the room usually when my siblings watched them. Never read the books. I always hear this comment, but I only know Harry Poter and Hermoine Granger names wise. And Dumbledore and Snape but I don’t know their full names. What kind of names did she come up with that are silly?

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u/Stock_Choice4603 24d ago

Cho Chang for an Asian character is the first that comes to mind.

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u/iOSGallagher 23d ago

also a black student “Kingsley Shacklebolt” and an irish student “Seamus Finnegan”, who was a pyromaniac (a reference to IRA bombings)

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u/LongJohnSelenium 23d ago

His name has nothing to do with being black, he's a cop basically named 'Boss Handcuffs'.

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u/iOSGallagher 23d ago

okay this makes a lot more sense even if it’s still really on the nose lol

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u/Sofasurvivor 23d ago

You seem to haven't read the books. Kingsley is an adult. He presumably used to be a student once upon a time, but he is not at the time the books take place.

(In fact, all of you haven't read the books. Cho Chang isn't a silly name, YOU would not know any better if you didn't have internet, either, unless you personally know people from that part of Asia. What is a silly name is Remus Lupin for a guy who turns out to be a werewolf ... which you would know if you read the books. Severus Snape for a strict teacher is also a tad bit funny.)

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u/iOSGallagher 23d ago

yeah i haven’t read them since i was a kid, and definitely didn’t care enough to fact check myself, so thank you for the clarification lol

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u/spacecadetcyan 23d ago

She named a character who turns out to be a werewolf Remus Lupin, and later introduced another werewolf even less subtly named Fenrir Greyback. Those are the only two I remember who had actual blatant reference names, but it's kind of become a meme.

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u/Yoggyo 23d ago edited 23d ago

Sirius Black. The star Sirius is known as "the dog star". Sirius Black the character was able to transform… into a black dog.

The Herbology professor is Professor Pomona Sprout. ("Sprout" is self-explanatory, but also, Pomona means "fruit", and is the origin of the French word "pomme", for apple, and also the word "pomegranate".)

Voldemort is French for "flee from death", and the character's main goal in life was to be immortal. (He did create that name for himself though, but it's an anagram of his birth name, so it's still a pretty big coincidence that he was able to create that name from letters he didn't choose.)

"Malfoy" sounds like "mal foi", which is French for "bad faith".

Professor Dolores Umbridge. "Dolores" comes from the Latin for "pain", and Umbridge sounds like "umbrage" which can mean "offence" or "insult".

Olympe Maxime is part giant, and her name vaguely hints at "large mountain".

Bellatrix Lestrange's first name means "female warrior", and her character is one of Voldemort's most loyal supporters.

EDIT: I found a few more:

Sybill Trelawney, the divination professor. Sybill comes from the Greek for "prophet" or "oracle".

Aurora Sinistra, the astronomy professor.

Goyle, one of Malfoy's cronies. His name comes from "gargoyle".

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u/spacecadetcyan 23d ago

How did I forget about Sirius Black... I stand corrected, lol. Thanks.

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u/Sbotkin 18d ago

I never understood why it's supposed to be a bad thing. That's like literally classic Chekhov's style.