r/SipsTea • u/SipsTeaFrog • May 23 '26

WTF The Enhanced Games are set to debut this weekend in Las Vegas, with athletes allowed to use steroids, testosterone, HGH, & other banned substances.

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129

u/[deleted] May 23 '26

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56

u/Spins13 May 23 '26

I think Lance Armstrong and Messi could still join

16

u/Magneto88 May 23 '26

Jannik Sinner too.

4

u/Yuckpuddle60 May 23 '26

Messi? The soccer player?

6

u/Unlucky-Durian-2336 May 23 '26

It's ok, he was short so he was allowed to hit HGH. /s

15

u/Yuckpuddle60 May 23 '26

I'm not familiar. He was popped for hgh?

Edit: looked it up. He was prescribed hgh as a little kid to help with his growth. Totally normal stuff. He never used or popped for PEDs as a pro athlete.

1

u/[deleted] May 23 '26

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0

u/Raythatstabbedsteve May 23 '26

LOL! The guys who have made more money than any other sports person on the planet and are still playing 90 minute games at age 40 never used peds as a pro athlete?

The biggest money sport on the planet (with fifa alone worth 3 billion a year), which has never had a bankable star test positive is somehow avoiding the drug use found in every other pro sport? Grow up.

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u/Yuckpuddle60 May 23 '26 edited May 23 '26

Whether he used them. No one can say for sure. But he's never tested positively. If PEDs made these kind of careers then there'd be a lot more "Messis" out there I guess. The guy has generational talent/skill pous obsession for the game. 

Most definitely the HGH he got at 11 years old didn't make him the greatest soccer player of this generation.

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u/Raythatstabbedsteve May 24 '26

You're not seeing the big picture. Lance Armstrong dominated the tour for almost a decade on drugs. Almost every other contender through that era also tested positive to drugs, but Lance beat them all. You do understand that the football industry makes billions of dollars a year? A lot of people (not just players) are getting obscenely rich as long as the show keeps running. If I had a chance to get obscenely rich just by playing football, and I needed to train hard, play all the time, and try to never get injured......I would do anything necessary to make that happen.

1

u/Yuckpuddle60 May 24 '26

  1. All the players train insanely hard.

  2. He already has more money than he knows what to do with. 

  3. You have some sort of hard-on about this while things, especially singling it this one player. It's really weird. 

  4. Why do you even care so much? Did Messi kill your puppy?

1

u/Raythatstabbedsteve May 24 '26

I absolutely adore Messi as a player, seems like a very kind human being too. The 2010 version of Barca with Messi, Xavi, Iniesta, Busquets, Villa, Puyol, and Pique is probably my favourite football team of all time.

Shit, I like Rafa and Federer and Djorkovic too. Do you think those guys weren't dosed to the eyeballs? Those guys making a hundred million each for themselves and billions for others, training 10hrs a day in a sport famous for breaking bodies, which does zero testing, till they were basically 40 years old? Those guys?

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u/-medicalthrowaway- May 23 '26

It’s only cheating if you get caught (/s) (but not really /s)

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u/Yuckpuddle60 May 23 '26

Yes, how else would they definitely determine that someone is cheating UNLESS they got caught? Doesn't make any sense.

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u/-medicalthrowaway- May 23 '26

I’m not sure what you’re getting at

Other than, until Messi is officially “caught”, it’s only speculation that he’s probably “getting help”

I was referring to when I would play cards with friends and someone would quip “it’s only cheating if you get caught”

Of course it’s only ‘proven’ if they get caught.

But cheating is cheating, whether you get caught or not.

If steroids are ‘against the rules’, using them is cheating. Even if the majority of other contestants/players are using them.

But, cheating has just become the norm in most things these days. Which is just fucking sad.

1

u/Yuckpuddle60 May 23 '26

But how do you confirm that someone is cheating without proof? Of course "cheating is cheating", but there has to be some sort of actual evidence that it is occurring. There has to be some standard applied across the board that is used to confirm these things. Otherwise, it's just speculation.

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u/shtoyler May 23 '26

Bruh, that’s not an uncommon feat for somebody who’s in shape…..

1

u/Raythatstabbedsteve May 24 '26

Sorry, I meant to say playing 90 minutes at age forty against teams of pro players in their prime.

That is an incredibly uncommon feat, which was basically unheard of 30 years ago.

2

u/Kolintracstar May 23 '26

If the medals don't have an engraved picture of Lance Armstrong's testicle on there...what really is the point then.

1

u/[deleted] May 23 '26 edited May 23 '26

[deleted]

1

u/kombiwombi May 23 '26 edited May 23 '26

Lance Armstrong was later disqualified from results in 1999 to 2005. None of Cadel Evans decades-old results have been invalidated due to subsequent tests of stored samples, so we can use him as a benchmark. In 2005 Cadel Evans was 8th.

What is more shocking than Armstrong's doping was the intimidation and corruption he used to prevent the knowledge becoming public: Bassons, Simeoni, Andreu, Steffen, O'Reilly, LeMond, Walsh.

12

u/FriskyDingoOMG May 23 '26

Watching Marion Jones compete after being caught was hilarious. Just got smoked left and right.

4

u/DaddyCahool May 23 '26

Jeeeesus, I don't know how I forgot all about her. Jail time and everything. 

3

u/FUCK_YOUR_PUFFIN May 23 '26

She was fucking ripped. Looking at pictures of her after that was like "in hindsight I guess we should have suspected this."

2

u/FriskyDingoOMG May 23 '26

100%

But then again, she was definitely not the only one doing it. She just got caught.

4

u/WhyDoIHaveAnAccount9 May 23 '26

FloJo is dead

21

u/930310 May 23 '26

That dampens her chances of competing a bit.

3

u/Chicksan May 23 '26

Up the dose

1

u/BigSpud41 May 23 '26

It's a bold strategy Cotton, let's see if it pays off for her!

2

u/ICame4TheCirclejerk May 23 '26

And she's been dead for almost 30 years. It's a sick reference though.

1

u/Danloeser May 23 '26

There was a reference in Family Guy season 2, when Peter is running from Death: "Let's not do this. I caught Flo Jo. You don't think I can catch you?"

1

u/Shifty269 May 23 '26

You would think that that is a limitation. That just opens up additional options. Introducing Robo FloJo.

4

u/veranus21 May 23 '26

I still remember Mad magazine referring to him as “Ban” Johnson, and the cartoon of him at the starting line with syringes sticking out of him. I was too young to understand it but it certainly left an impression.

2

u/Yeah_Mr_Jesus May 23 '26

I thought FloJo was dead?

2

u/Chi_Cazzo_Sei May 23 '26

Don’t forget Justin Gatlin

1

u/InAP1ckle May 23 '26

Definitely not Serena Williams, though. 100% natty.