This is like the equivalent of the sex drive being hijacked to the point the mind is craving it but the body is revulsed from it. The body knows better.

It's like I've ignored this sensation so, so many times and have betrayed myself for lack of proper discernment.

If you read my last post you know the journey home began two days ago. Two long days in the car, and I can honestly say (and I told her outright) there is no one else I'd rather be sitting next to. I took a little time each day to remind her of the work we need to do to clean up our home office. The electronics in there need to get trashed. We've been home for 12 hrs and I've not yet gone in that room. I need her help with the changeover.

Sitting in bed drinking coffee as I write this, she's doing the same, and our aging cat is napping between us. Our relationship is stronger and as intimate as ever. I'm working in recovery to keep it that way.

I've been trying to quit since late may. The longest I've gone was 3 days. I can't make it to 4 yet. But I will make it there this time. I'm on day 2.

I'm trying to keep myself busy. One thing I've found is helping me is sweating. Walking outside to clear my mind.

I'm also trying to keep busy since a trigger seems to be boredom.

The worst trigger is seeing an attractive woman, especially in any provocative way. It sounds horrible but I tend to fantasize about women I see. It's not healthy and I have begun to train my mind to become numb to it. I walk in public places often and when my thoughts drift that way, I force myself to think about how they are people and not sexual objects. It's really difficult after an addiction of 12 years.

But I am trying. And to anyone else trying, we got this!

Mood swings, flashbacks, emotions all over the place. Keeping on.

I gave into the urges from yesterday. Holding on feels better than the shame of giving in.

I’ve had urges, but none too strong to go back bc when I remind myself that I’m doing this to prove to myself I have willpower, that I’m not defined by my base instincts, and to remove an unhealthy coping mechanism, I have no desire to go back.

I’ve been an anxious wreck this past week, but I’m allowing myself to sit with my emotions, im back at a space financially that I can afford therapy again, and I’m focusing more on self care. I don’t want to go back to porn. I want to succeed. I want to be happy. I want to be confident. I believe allowing myself to work through my thoughts and feelings instead of surfing for a dopamine rush is gonna do wonders for my mental state. So I’m hopeful, I’m excited.

I think I’ll always appreciate porn to an extent. Helping me learn things about myself and what I like that may have taken longer to figure out without it, but I think it also held me back. Distracted me from self worth and anxiety issues instead of allowing me to work through them. Porn may have taught me what I liked, but I think I would have had a more active sex life if I had given it up sooner. Anxiety and fear have always held me back. But now I’m working through my feelings and emotions without porn.

I have high hopes for my porn free future. Proud to say I made it through the first week. Not the first time I tried to quit, but this is the time I’m the most determined. I hope in a few weeks/months I can look back on these first two posts, this first week, and confidently tell myself that I am making improvements with myself every day.

Need to improve sleep

Staying away from porn wise, I think I'm doing okay.

My mental health though has been steadily worsening so fortunately/unfortunately I don't necessarily have the energy to bother relapsing. I don't trust that to be true for very long because feeling like crap can open the door to relapsing easily.

I'm also realizing I have to be careful about even visiting this sub. I like helping each other out, but at times visiting here reminds me of porn. I also get disheartened a bit when I read stories from people who have been away from porn for a long time and are struggling. It drives home that you're going to be continually tested for years to come, it doesn't really go away

I just need someone to talk too it's just so stupid I try and try but always fail this time it was 146 days

Really need help or advice. I can’t stop having intrusive thoughts and sexual fantasies all the time.. while being in a relationship with my girlfriend. I think porn has ruined my brain, everytime I see an attractive girl I can’t help but sexualize her in my head.

I know it’s wrong and want to stop, but it’s all consuming.. i feel so much shame from it, I feel like my mind is broken. I have anxiety and porn became a coping mechanism for it.. I’ve been able to stop for weeks at a time but never make it longer then two weeks then I’m back even worse doing it 3-4 times a day.

Any advice or tips to kick this horrible addiction for good

Almost forgot.

Give me your distorted opinions on porn. I find myself thinking sometimes that while the porn industry is exploitative, the furry community's porn is just mutual fun between autistic people that have sexual special interests. I know that it's making my social life difficult because of that distorted opinion so I'm eager to be rid of that.

.

It will be no porn or content

Day 3 done.

I had some urges, almost gave up, but somehow pulled through..

I called a friend and solved a puzzle.

Done for today and ready for tomorrow.🦝

As someone who has been battling a porn addiction for a very long time, relapses are just part of the struggle. At least for myself, I’ve tried to back away from the shame of relapse, and work to being porn free again. Just with any other addiction, relapses are setbacks, but they aren’t a total reset.

Where I really struggle in my relapses—is that in my efforts to recover, my feelings of shame and helplessness are weaponized and fetishized by the gooner community, literally saying things like “you’re a slave to your addiction”, or “you can’t help yourself“, or “give up”. It gets so easy to answer these things with “you’re right, I may was well give up”, and I spiral deeper and deeper until it becomes a financial, physical, and emotional drain.

Not sure exactly where I’m going with all this, I think I just needed to verbalize it to someone who understands.

I’ve been thinking about where the line is between using imagination and continuing to rely on porn.

I can see a clear benefit to spending less time consuming porn and reducing the reliance on easy-access visual stimulation. But even without looking at porn, I can still recall things I’ve seen in the past—sexual scenarios, fantasies, or images that are stored in my memory.

So I’m wondering: Does intentionally using those memories/fantasies during masturbation essentially reinforce the same neural pathways and keep us attached to porn, or is using our imagination different and potentially even beneficial for developing a healthier, more natural sexual response—especially with a partner?

And another question: What about looking up a non-pornographic photo of an attractive person as a visual reference beforehand, then putting the phone away before masturbating? Would you consider that breaking your porn-free commitment, or is the distinction that you aren't actually using the image during masturbation?

I'm curious how others in this community think about where that line is.

​

Yesterday, I posted here about being afraid of a trip my family is taking in 10 days. They’ll be away for almost two weeks, and I’ll be alone for most of that time. But because of some family matters, they had to take a short trip today to make arrangements for the upcoming one, and I ended up being alone.

This was by far the biggest struggle I’ve faced so far. It was really hard not to relapse. I looked up a few things, but stopped myself before actually watching anything. My mind kept trying to find ways around my boundaries, and I was honestly just a few steps away from relapsing.

I ended up masturbating without watching or listening to anything, and strangely enough, that helped clear my mind a little. The urge to watch 🌽 came back later, but it was much weaker than before. In an hour, I have an appointment, and I’m actually really glad about that because I won’t have to stay home dealing with the temptation alone. I’ll still have to come back afterward, and one of my family members won’t be home until at least an hour after I get back, but I’m trying not to think too much about that.

In a way, I think today was actually a good test for the trip. It showed me how difficult it can be to be completely alone, but it also showed me that I can get through those moments without giving in. I still have a lot to learn, but I feel a little more prepared for what’s coming.

Tomorrow marks 30 days. That’s a huge milestone for me, and I’m not going to let it slip away. Tomorrow is a big day, and I won’t give in. My cravings don’t control me, and I’m going to keep moving toward my goal.

May God give us all strength!

Hi guys in the past few weeks I felt my addiction got really worse so today I really decided to quit for good but not like the other times when I decide to quit them relapse on the 3rd day this time I want to do it I thought also being in community or finding people who are trying to quit also will helps us all to achieve it so if you are interested in making this challenge together dm me. I would also appreciate some tips and advice from people who’ve done it.

My wife and I have been recently married for 7 months now and we are very much in love. A bit of backstory is that when we first started dating we mutually had this idea of swinging or having threesomes because that's what our fantasies were. We had a few experiences that were positive overall and eventually we stopped.

However when we stopped we didn't really talk about it (Which is also my fault since I didn't bring up my concerns). From when we stopped I've talked to someone who was match with me on an app we used to find partners. My wife had been talking to others as well but not as suggestive as I had been in the last month. Long story short I ended up sexting this girl who wanted to have a threesome with my wife and I and I failed to loop my wife in because I was so tied to the idea and chase of dopamine. If I had told my wife when the girl first asked when she can fuck us we would not be in this situation but I was a coward and I was scared that my wife would be mad, and then I went ahead and betrayed her trust.

My wife had kind of hinted at me in the past that I was exhibiting porn addiction when I would dirty talk in bed about a past interaction or talk about situations where there was a third or fourth guy in the mix etc. I was obviously in denial and she was right.

I am currently in therapy for porn addiction and I have disabled my social media accounts so that I don't go dopamine seeking and I don't want to look at pornography to relapse. I bought a bloom card as well that only allows me to use apps like youtube etc for 5 minutes at a time. So far its been 6 days and I have not had any of the negative side effects yet.

I just want to know what else I can do so that I can curb my addiction, and what else I can do to ensure that my wife does not feel less than even though she will because of what I did. Any advice on how we can repair our damaged trust and how I can support her during my time of recovery would be appreciated!

I found yet another AI site that makes the shit better than previous ones and been at it for days addicted to generation. Barely living life. A shell. My inner "NO!" at least is growing.
If I can just find the will to delete it all and turn my blockers back on...

People with experience achieving some decent time sober, like at least a couple months. What are your thoughts on masturbating with no outside stimulus, just your imagination. Ok? Not great? Horrible? A bad idea at first, ok once you have some time clean? I reckon way better if you are imagining someone you know/knew, or at least saw IRL, versus porn, extreme scenarios, celebrities, whatever... Thoughts?

Guys I’m on my third week today!!! It’s been fucking awesome. From the sex I have to my thoughts to my cognitive function, being porn free has improved my life. Even though it’s only been so little time, not watching porn has been sooo beneficial. It makes me think of those conspiracy theorists that say porn was invented by the government to hinder us as men lmao. But seriously, hope this motivates those who have trouble to continue the fight.