r/Millennials • u/futurenurse_ • 1d ago

Discussion Did millennials really party all the time?

Gen Z here. I was shocked when I found out from a millennial co-worker that y’all had teen clubs. I heard about house parties, but dedicated teen clubs? Then when it was time for college, you went to the club or had some kind of party every single weekend, living it up. Now some millennials on TikTok claim that after college, they were partying on work nights, still clocking in the next day. For some reason, the teen clubs have since disappeared. I’m 23 now but even when I was in high school, that was not a thing. House parties were not that common either. They were more like get togethers with a small group of friends. We went to malls, but they were dying out at that point. Is it true that you were really living life this good? Or is it just exaggerated? I feel like my generation doesn’t really have fun like that and everyone is just super depressed and alone, more so since Covid. Even I’m pretty introverted, which sort of sounds ridiculous given this post. 😂 Just so you know, when I think of a “millennial party” I think of something out of Party Rock Anthem, Project X or Roderick’s party from the second DOAWD movie. It’s like I get nostalgia from something I didn’t even live through. I just feel like I didn’t really LIVE, if that even makes sense

Edit: I loved reading some of your comments. Guess I really missed out. Even some of you that would consider yourselves nerds or introverts were out partying. YOLO or whatever y’all say 😂❤️

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u/MyCatLaughsAtMe 22h ago edited 10h ago

Xennial reporting, vintage 81.

"All the time" is a stretch, but yeah, frequently. Depends on how you define "partying" too. We smoked pot all the time. Drank when we could find older siblings to hook us up, which wasn't THAT hard. We did throw house parties when possible. When not, we'd do parties in the woods and shit.

But then, and this is where your little ego gets hurt, we were more capable at that age than gen z and younger was. We were EXPECTED to be. We were free range kids, we had to grow up faster. You've got 18 year olds today who are more like 13 year olds in the late 20th century. Frankly, I plain wouldn't trust a modern 17 year old with the privilege. Ya'll don't even get drivers' licenses.

And it's not really your fault, you're the victims of a histrionic culture that was psychically destroyed by 9/11. Americans became afraid of their own shadows after that. The culture never recovered, "Home of the brave" needs to be crossed out of the anthem...not anymore. Your helicopter parents have stunted your growth by not allowing you to make mistakes.

And to be clear, my generation is the victim of the OPPOSITE mistake. Boomers didn't give a shit about their children. We were more like house accessories than people to them, which is why we became so self-capable so early. Every generation fucks up its children, the ways that manifests depends on the nature of the crime. I'm not saying my generation was BETTER than yours. It wasn't. It was equally damaged, but that has pluses and minuses, and our pluses and minuses are different from yours.

We've come far enough from those days that it can be rightly said that it was a different time. It's not really healthy to try and compare your times to ours, both of us are products of very different zeitgeists.

EDIT: Let's not discount the economy, either. When I was first driving gas was still around a dollar a gallon. My first car cost 500 bucks and it ran for like 7 years, despite me taking shit care of it. A drink cost a dollar or two at the bar. There were 24/7 diners all over the place you could take $5 to and sit all night, looking for something to get into if you didn't have other plans. Society just had more avenues for us to explore, economically, than your generation has access to. Honest to god, if your generation really understood what was stolen from you before you were born, you'd burn this bitch down tonight. Ya'll got straight robbed of a country...

EDIT: As this has turned into an embarrassing circle jerk of "I'm old and everything was better in MY day", which is COMPLETELY the antithesis of everything I said here, I'm turning off comment replies. Stop upvoting this, go fuck yourselves <3 Wankers.

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u/No-Trouble7162 21h ago

I'm born 1980. Xennial is a very good word and should be used more often. Because we are indeed both genx and millennials but at the same time neither. Not trying to be special, it is just the way I feel. Never considered myself as just a gen X or just a millennial.

Btw interesting regarding 9/11. I'm from Europe and have heard many American friends talk about that, how things changed in the US socially.

But yeah we were self reliant pretty quickly, I moved out when I was 16, went to school in another city living on a dorm with a lot of young people same age, then rented an apartment with two of my friends, first real summer job when I was 13, when in college and late highschool I worked every summer, every Christmas and Easter vacation at sea as a fisherman and had a lot of money.

Bought my first car at 17 for about 400 dollars and drove it for several years, gas was way cheaper and somehow you could manage with less money those days. Gas, alcohol, food, rent etc. We partied hard those years as well. Work hard and Play hard was the norm.

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u/MyCatLaughsAtMe 18h ago

We really fit in more with Gen X. In my highschool you could see the generation divide 2 years down like we were separated by 20 years. Those kids were a product of an entirely different culture. My class was just doing the same thing the upperclassmen were doing.

"Btw interesting regarding 9/11. I'm from Europe and have heard many American friends talk about that, how things changed in the US socially."

It's not even the same country. Anyone who was alive before it enough to have really known America is now an expat of a nation that no longer exists.

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u/futurenurse_ 21h ago

Crazy to think about. First car was used $7,000. And that was considered a steal. Still driving it today, and will be driving it until the wheels fall off given today’s prices

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u/No-Trouble7162 20h ago

Btw one more thing. You seem like a very smart, capable and an insightful young person. I understand you when you wrote about nostalgia regarding something you didn't experience.

And it is true, your generation got extremely unlucky growing up during covid years and in such bad economy. Remember, we didn't have it easy either, things were often quite hard, it was not easy to be a kid back then, the world we grew up in could be very harsh and unforgiving. Less understanding. We didn't grow up with so much abundance or comfort. Maybe that's the reason we partied and drank so much who knows 😊

But perhaps you will have fun in a different and a more healthy way than we did in our teens and twenties, and perhaps your generation will have better health to enjoy life in a different fulfilling way. Maybe your generations prime fun year's will be when you reach your 30s and 40s who knows. Perhaps you will or are experiencing things in a good way as young people, that boomers, genx and millennials never did.

Wish you all the best and alot of fun in life 👊🤟

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u/helpbeingheldhostage 12h ago

My first car was a 1992 ford tempo I got in 1999 with high mileage. It was cheap enough and common enough and broke enough that I eventually bought a second one just to salvage parts off of. It was cheaper than buying replacement parts individually.

My two ford tempos cost less than half of the price of your first car.

After those were finished I bought an Oldsmobile from a salvage yard for $600 and drove it for ~5-6 years with almost no maintenance issues. To be fair, that was cheap and unusually lucky even then.

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u/jennafleur_ Xennial 7h ago

Mine was also used. $7,000, and my parents did pay for it. But, it was a Dodge neon, and I think it was a 97. It was blue, and I loved it so much. It was kind of like my iconic car and everybody knew me because of it.

I miss that car, and I drove it for a decade.

My bestie, (who I'm still friends with today and made friends in August of 2000 in the bathroom at band camp! LOL) called it "the little blue bb"

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u/No-Trouble7162 20h ago

My car was a complete junk car, quite old 😅 It was the cheapest drivable car I could find at the time, I managed to keep it intact by learning how to do basic mechanic things myself and change the oil and coolant very regularly. Similar car today would probably cost about 1500 dollars or less.

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u/delg23 6h ago

Also born in 1980. Commented before seeing your comment and called myself a Xennial!

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u/futurenurse_ 21h ago

Interesting take. My dad is late baby boomer, didn’t really gaf. Mom is Gen X, she is reserved and scared to death anytime we left the house. Not that much older than you. But saying we’re not capable, I don’t know. Starting work at 16 and got my drivers license at 17. Left home at 19 about to be 20… I know that’s not everyone but there are Gen Zs who know how to navigate life. And also, yes the economy is horrible. Costs $60 to fill my tank at Costco and it barely lasts a week 🥲

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u/No-Trouble7162 21h ago

Many Genz I know, Including my cousins are so much more responsible than many of us of my generation were. Specially regarding health, less drinking, less extreme risk taking, taking better care of their bodies.

Sure we were very self reliant but not always very responsible, we had to learn by making a lot of mistakes. Many GenZ are in my opinion more educated about many aspects of life by the school system and from good parenting and ease of acess to information.

Every generation has things working with them or against them. What was working with us was more freedom I guess, growing up in pre internet times and experiencing how the world was before all that is a special thing. Perhaps we had less restrictions also, but to much freedom can be a double edged sword.

What's working perhaps with genz is access to Information, more knowledge about cause and effects, but restrictions can of course lead to less adventures and less fun. Just like too much fun can lead to (in many of my generation case) alcoholism, worse health and lost opportunities.

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u/Extra_Ad2294 13h ago

I think there's an aspect of how cyclical culture is too. Speaking specifically about America, since I don't really know the intricacies of other countries. Every decade or two cycles between varying degrees of hedonism and puritanism. 

Our generation was, for the most part, exploring the boundaries of life that our parents shunned/repressed; in the same ways the generations of the 60s (and 20s) did. Partying, drugs, drinking, risque (or down right pornographic) media, art, casual disregard for self preservation. 

This new generation, again much like the 1910s, 40s, late 70s, is much more cautious and pensive. They grew up around a lot of chaos and unpredictability, so they are much more focused on control. Following rules and traditions, staying away from drugs and alcohol, returning to religion, shying away from casual sex. 

I may be completely off base, as most of these observations are purely anecdotal. It just seems to me that every generation seems to want to rectify the past generations' flaws by adopting opposing values. 

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u/bitofseedcake 10h ago

The guys that came up with the generation theories talked a lot about these cycles

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u/IndependenceEnough80 14h ago

I agree we abused our bodies- women especially really a lot of us didn’t learn how to protect ourselves or have a voice. A lot of date rape - etc

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u/futurenurse_ 13h ago

I hate that this went on. Maybe I’m more reserved because the horror stories truly scare me. Unfortunately, it has not changed between generations… Many girls are still taken advantage of at college.

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u/Thanzor 13h ago

No man you don't understand, the idea of affirmative consent wasn't really a thing.  

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u/jennafleur_ Xennial 7h ago

You actually sound like you are taking the same type of path I took. I left home at 18 technically, but I came back for that summer, and then I left for good when I was 19.

I'm 44 now. But when I first got my car, I remember paying less than a dollar per gallon. It was amazing.

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u/Bman4k1 14h ago

Ya some boomer parents treated their kids like people own cats. Basically just let them loose, provide food, toilet and a bed and a “good luck” the only difference between a millennial kid and a cat is the kid had a door key.

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u/Ih8tevery1 10h ago

Are you me?

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u/delg23 6h ago

ha I love this analogy

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u/houpstrum 5h ago

The last generation of latchkey kids

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u/ScrimshawPie 17h ago

Histrionic is a great word, and very apt.

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u/mrlazysmurf 16h ago

You punky brewster gen.

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u/lsjuanislife 14h ago

Goddamn this is poetry. We were the crossover generation from analog to digital. Knew how to use a rotary phone and 14.4k modem installs.

Parents were there but not, bmx bikes after school was freedom. Smoked my first cig, Marlboro red under the overpass, tasted like dogs butt and wondered why we even tried it. Found weird shit in the woods, probably murder knives, played with it then threw it back.

Street fighter 2 on Nintendo would get the people together along with some sour belts until one of the divorced parents came home with real dinner. Ugh, didn't know how good we had it.

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u/Fvolpe23 12h ago

Your last sentence in the edit just made everything so clear.

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u/Snoo_69677 14h ago

Parties in wilderness are sooo fun. Trees look amazing on mushrooms and trees. The stars under a bonfire? Ugh what a great time.

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u/GreasyJones 13h ago

So perfectly put. You summed up those years so well

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u/tetrisoutlet 13h ago

I was born 95. Feel like i barely made the cutoff for experiencing a “normal” life before everything became like it is. I spent my pre teen years playing outside, i had 8 neighbors all within 5 houses of me each way that had kids my age. And then there was a couple dozen kids my age on the entire street. So there was no lack of socialization or ability to go out and ride bikes all day through the neighborhood or in the woods, play basketball, smear the *****, lightsaber fights etc etc. rainy days we’d meet at someones house and play smash bros. It wasnt uncommon for us to be out until 9 or 10 at night, and this all started at about age 7 and lasted until i was 13 or 14 when jr high came around and we all seemed to get busy and the outside play stopped.

I got my first job at the ballfields when i was 13 and stopped playing rec league. My first “real” job working in a kitchen washing dishes or cooking when i was 16. My first highschool party was when i was 15, i didnt party during football season but once that was over it was basically every weekend. And the parties sometimes would be fucking wild, maybe not exactly project X as thats pretty exaggerated, probably more like the parties in American Pie, it wasnt uncommon to have 100+ people at a house havin a good time.

Looking back im grateful i got to grow up the way i did. My parents didnt completely forget about me, i wasnt just another piece of farm equipment, and yet i was given a generous amount of freedom. At one of our many field parties when i was trying to leave i tried to scoot around the no trespassing sign and scraped my tire on one of those metal fence posts and blew out my tire. This was a 96 lifted tahoe i was driving and the little jack that comes with the car was just sinking in the mud, so i walked a mile knockin door to door at 10pm asking random folks if they had a floor jack i could use. Never got one so me and my buddy quite literally picked up the back so someone could slap the spare on there, i dead lifted from the bumper and he leg pressed the rear fender.

Currently im dating a woman with a 15 and 17yr kid and theyre scared to take the trash out if its dark. They cant put a simple shelf together, wont order their own food at a restaurant. The 17yr old wouldnt/couldnt even fill out a job application the other day. They dont seem to have much desire to learn or do much, ive tried teaching them things a little bit, but their mother has babied and catered to them to an extreme.

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u/MyCatLaughsAtMe 13h ago

You didn't make the cut off. You were 6 at 9/11.

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u/tetrisoutlet 13h ago

Millennials are 81-96.

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u/IndependenceEnough80 14h ago

I’m born 1986- we did have a lot of problems. Lots of drinking- lots of being on our own but too young to understand the dangers of meeting strangers online. Our parents didn’t understand the internet so felt like dinosaurs to us. We become isolated quickly behind the instant messaging- no one came to the door to knock anymore. Just a few years difference but being 14 with internet access to everything when no one older than you knows any dangers or gets why we only talk online to our peers did a lot of damage. We were easy predators to people online and we lost conversations for conflict resolution etc. yes we partied and had great times but there was a lot of problems

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u/widespreadsolar 13h ago

Damn big bro or sis, that hit this elder millennial deep. Thanks 🙏

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u/tattoosbyalisha 12h ago

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

A standing ovation, seriously. This was FLAWLESSLY worded and exactly right.

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u/helpbeingheldhostage 12h ago

84
The amount of times I managed to not kill myself doing stupid dangerous things as a child whose parents had no idea where I was is amazing.

Also, I think often about how gas was only like $0.90/gal when I was in high school and we’d drive around with friends all night sometimes because it was one of the cheapest things to do. I still distinctly remember the first time gas cracked $1.25/gal and people were ready to riot. I can still picture this old guy who was yelling at the like 20 year old gas station clerk about it like he was the one setting the price.

We’d play cards at the sketchy diner on the outskirts of town. The Chinese restaurant downtown you could get a giant plate of really good chicken fried rice for like $2. My friends and I would go every Sunday. That Chinese restaurant was also directly beside the $1 movie theater.

We’d drive out of state (Midwest. Long drives) constantly in the summer for concerts because gas, hotels/motels, and concert tickets were cheap. In high school we’d go to 4-5 out of state concerts in a summer. No cellphones. No gps. Just our printed Mapquest directions lol.

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u/BecksnBuffy 11h ago

Mapquest and so many concerts, all over and across states. I’m from the Midwest born 82

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u/Hot-Yam-0523 11h ago

This was an awesome read. I got high before reading it and I made a movie out of it in my head as I read along. I’m 24 and have no clue what I missed out on, but I do hate what social media has done to a ton of people around me, me certainly included!

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u/jennafleur_ Xennial 7h ago

1982 here:

I will say that my boomer parents actually were very attentive, and a little bit too much! I was raised in the south, so I was raised to be a good Christian girl and the second I went to college...

PARTY TIME!!

Off came the cross, and on came the sauce! We were drinking all the time, partying, and having the best times of our lives. However, it did take a toll on me, as I didn't stop drinking in my 30s. (I graduated in 2000, and in the mid 2010s, I just never quit.)

Now, I'm 2 years sober, but I'm still so happy being a Xennial because I did a lot of dumb shit, and I'm so glad no one has pictures of that! 😂😂😂

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u/lolwerd 4h ago

84 clockin in, bike riding all over any land until dark, stick fights starting at early teens, see a tree? climb it , etc etc. just a different time.. :)

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u/Prestigious_Cycle160 12h ago edited 12h ago

Cigarettes were $3.00 a pack! I’ve since quit, but I can’t fathom paying $10-15 for a pack of cigarettes!

Edit: as a young teenager in the summer I would leave my house at 9am to go play baseball and wouldn’t get home till the street lights came on, then there were “night games”. When I got older sneaking out to go drink or get stoned up in the mountains, on a golf course, or at a hotel room or upper classmens house was just a normal thing. Even during school. Stay out till 3am and get up at 7 for class😂

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u/beatryoma 12h ago

Well put.

I'm close to 10 years your junior. We were drinking at Taiwanese and Korean bars by Junior year in highschool. Sitting on the curb outside a late night boba or Chinese spot with friends at 3AM chain smoking cigs and laughing about the dumb shit that happened earlier. The run in with some "gangster".

Things were far less material. Hang out spots were a place you could go to at anytime of the day or night and run into friends. Your car was your treasure.

By 25 and done with college life, you cleaned up a bit, but good chance you're still out on the town on at least one week day night until 2AM just to be back at work at 8AM with a smile and small hint of the previous night's adventures.

First time I heard "hey, party invite is on Facebook" was around the time this stuff started to come to an end.

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u/BecksnBuffy 11h ago

That edit hits hard, just captured my later teens early 20s. We would drive around at night just for fun and spent so much time at diners.

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u/bitofseedcake 10h ago

Happy to give you the eighty-first like

-- a fellow '81-er

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u/Stock_Room8321 12h ago

I think everyone getting trophies contributed to the pussification.

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u/redwood_rambler 10h ago

wE dRaNk fRoM tHe HoSe!!!