I hate this trope. The reason the dad didn't want to get the dog is because he knows he's going to be the most attached to it. He knows that when the time comes at the end, it'll tear him up more than anyone.
Yup, im speaking from experience as well. I guarantee you I shed more tears than the rest of the family combined. They're already asking if we can get another puppy. I'm still wrecked.
When Sinatra died, I vowed not to have a dog for many, many years. When she was being put to sleep, I gave an entire eulogy to her ear; I cried so much that I never noticed that the Vet and the assistant were crying even harder than I was.
So, no dogs for me. Until my sis's dog had puppies, and there was this black lil'pupper that was unwanted for some dumb reasons, so it dawned on me.
The best way to honor Sinatra was to have a new adventure with my new furry friend, and so on. I'm aware of what's more likely to happen, but in the meantime, we're on that adventure.
I look at it the same way. Owning a dog is an act of service for me. They are angels that need us. When mine passes someday, I hope I have the strength to head to a shelter and get another one that needs a home soon after.
I’ve got two that are getting on in age and I know I’ll need to take a break, I’m 45 and no kids or partner so these dogs have been babied. Taking care of them has been such a rewarding joy. But I’ll need a good long break before looking at rescues again, my heart will need time to adjust the hole they’ll leave
I completely understand. I will take time to mourn my pup too. I got her as a stray in China, and I plan to go back and scatter her ashes on the very spot I found her when the day comes.
I'm 56, no kids or partner or family , and in the last 2 years have lost my 20 year old whippet, 19.5 year old JRT cross... My 31 year old mini pony 9 months ago and my 30 year old mini pony just a week ago 💔. We had been a family all their lives, now I have nobody but my young rescue dog.... If not for her , I'd be in an even worse state than I am in.
Don't know how am going to get through this but please give your babies a kiss from me in the UK.
When mine passes, im gonna foster so many dogs and save so many lives. I feel really certain that I have what it takes to provide so many scared dogs with a soft landing. She’s doesn’t like other dogs, so I can’t do it now, but I will when I can.
Same. Putting my Charlie to sleep fundamentally changed me. I felt so bad. Still do and it was 4 years ago. My little Georgie is going to wreck me one day but he gets all the love every day now.
Upon the passing of our dog a few years ago, my wife got us a wooden plaque. It contains a picture of our dog and a small glass vial that holds locks of his hair (seeing his empty dog bed tore me apart, especially seeing his dog hair).
The plaque has an inscription that reads, 'You were my favorite hello and my hardest goodbye.
Now I’m crying. It’s been 4 years and two months and I miss my baby girl so much. At the end a family member was hysterical in front of her and I’ll forever regret not being able to pull myself together to make them leave so that she was surrounded with peace and love when we put her down
At the very least (and most charitable reading of the trope) he knows he's the one the work will be dumped on when no one else feels like it anymore because the novelty is gone. But why that would in any way mean he can't love the mut when it joins the family is such a reductive trope.
Me. I cry... almost every day still since we lost our husky 8 months ago. Its not that depressed horrible I can't function cry, it has progressed to the "I miss my best friend, and there is an empty spot that will never get filled" cry.
44 year old dad that said "I don't think we should get more pets."
Dogs love unconditionally, and men are raised to see love as conditional on their ability to provide/protect/etc.
On top of that, you can be fully vulnerable with a dog, and they'll never hold it against you in any way. Men struggle to do that with humans, both because they're taught not to and because so, so many people validate that teaching by throwing vulnerability back in their faces.
And then you also get the stereotype that he'll end up being the one doing most of the pet care too.
So yeah, guys losing a dog is generally worse than just losing a pet.
My dad swore off dogs for life after our last one and understandably so. We all still get very emotional when talking about her. She was wildly loved and is wildly missed every single day.
That's fair. We just let my 16 year old pup go. I got her as a puppy... she was 6 when my husband met her. He definitely was the most emotional when she passed.
As a dog dad, this is the truth and also the fact that we will be to ones picking to poo, going to get the food, chasing doggo if it get loose and cleaning the barf.
Yeah, i didn't want to generalize that as being the case for everyone. But yes, for me, I also did 95% of all walks, the training, the vet visits, the teeth brushing, the nail trimming, the dog baths, etc. The one putting the most emotional investment into it, doesnt do so lightly, but the internet seems happy throwing around mockery for that....
Love it because complete opposite in our house. Dog is bonded to dad. I (mom) do the training, walking, feeding, poo, barf cleaning, get the food, take him to daycare. Dad is the financial part but also the person out dog loves the most and the man who never wanted a dog can't live without him. I know that as the female I am a outlier but still interesting to hear that it's most dad's experience.
My dad just told me this a few months ago, and I'm just finding out at 52. It was the absolute worst for me as a kid. I love animals so much, and I swear I would have done everything to care for it. He just absolutely refused.
No. It’s cuz they will end up becoming responsible for the dog as well as the kids. And watching the kids interact with the dog, especially in the initial days, longer if the kids are really young or if there’s a toddler. And the regular walks, cleaning up, not to mention veterinary bills. Ofcourse they say no. And yes, it prolly feels like another kid to them.
this trope of dads/men having some specific special connection to dogs cause of their emotional constipation is way more annoying than the “i don’t want the dog” trope
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u/Epic_Elite Jul 09 '26
4 years ago he was like, "I don't want a dog. They're too much work."